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Alejo Lopez pitched.

Alejo Lopez is not a pitcher.

Milwaukee Brewers v Cincinnati Reds Photo by Andy Lyons/Getty Images

The Cincinnati Reds hit a trio of 5th inning homers on Monday.

A trio! Of homers!

Said action was the high point of what was ultimately another throttling at the hands of an opponent, however, as the St. Louis Cardinals laid waste to the Reds in a 13-4 game that never had much of a chance in Reds-land. St. Louis raced out to an 8-0 lead after ‘starter’ Chase Anderson managed just 4 recorded outs, and the division leaders never truly looked back.

The Cincinnati Reds, oft mighty in years of yore and hardly relevant since, fell to 50-77 on their season with the loss. If it is optimism you seek in this recap, well, maybe they’ll find it in their hearts to re-sign Donovan Solano, as the cornerstone of this Reds lineup had yet another hit and walk on the evening.

Alejo Lopez pitched the 9th, for the record.

For the record, Alejo Lopez is not a pitcher. He did fare rather well comparatively speaking, however.

Nothing is coming up Milhouse for these Reds. Nothing tonight came up Milhouse, either.

The Reds and Cardinals will do this thing called ‘baseball’ again tomorrow, with Justin Dunn on the bump for the Reds once again. The Cardinals will, at least.