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Good Morning, Charlie - Weekend High

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Here’s some things to read about this morning

MLB: MAY 15 Reds at Rockies
Let’s. Fucking. Go.
Photo by Dustin Bradford/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images

A Good Thing - Nick Castellanos is so good. He is hitting everything and he is hitting everything hard and he is hitting everything when the game is on the line and he his hitting everything off starters in the first inning and it is such a delight to watch.

I always got the vibe that he was kind of intense and latently aggressive back when he was with the Tigers. He kinda looks like my ex-brother-in-law, so maybe I’m projecting. It seems like he’s pretty genuine though. The way he handled the farce of his suspension situation was more mature than I would have, but this passive-aggressive fuck off to Rob Manfred is enough to rocket him into the inner circles of the Red Reporter Dudes That Jam Club.

*********************SPECIAL BULLETIN*****************************

We interrupt this blogcast to report that Nick Castellanos is way too jam right now and that the blog’s circuits have been jammed up too much so we’re gonna have to go live to Rob Manfred to get his response:

We’re sorry, we were unable to reach Commissioner Manfred for comment. It seems his mouth is full of uncooked oats at the moment.

A Sucks Thing - Luis Castillo got his ass waxed again this weekend. My friend and yours Tone-Diggity takes a look at why. The not-as-sucks thing is that maybe the problem is something like tipping pitches and not, you know, full-blown Buttassington’s Disease.

A Way Jam Thing - The Marlins showed off their new City Connect jerseys and hachi-jumachi these shirts are neat.

The sleeve crest is particularly jam.

Another Jam Thing - Hunter Greene’s slider

The Kind of Brain-Melting Thing that Can Really Make Monday Worth Doing -

See, it isn’t that the fungus is smarter than you. I’m not saying that.