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The Daily Stupid - It’s Friggin’ Friday, y’all

The day after Thursday! Hooray!

Woodcut showing Freya or Frigg goddess of love in Scandinavian mythology, wife of Odin Photo by: Photo12/Universal Images Group via Getty Images

That picture up yonder is of the Norse goddess Frigg, often referred to as Frigga or Freya, chief deity of knowledge and foresight of our old northern brethren. She was the wife of Odin, and in case you haven’t noticed, from hump day through the end of the work week is named after those two and their son, Thor. Wodensday, Thorsday, Frigedaeg (thanks, Old English adaptation).

If you’re an Avengers fan, that means that today is Rene Russo Day, the day after Chris Hemsworth Day, which follows Anthony Hopkins Day. Hooray!

This all got me thinking, however. Since the seven-day week is all named after a mix of Greek and Norse gods and goddesses, what if they’d chosen some of their other deities after whom to name the days of the week? How rad would that have been?

We could have had Zooday after our buddy Zeus. Imagine the marketability.

Scouts from all facets of sport would have a much easier time seeing the players they were trying to scout if instead of one arbitrary day a year, there was a Proday every week in honor of Prometheus, Titan and godamm father of humankind.

Aphrodayte! Sorry.

Hermday, which is both in honor of dear Hermes and the day when all sports are played, the day you play to win the game.

Dayonysus! Sorry again.

Janusday, only there are two of them back to back to signal both the end of last week and the start of the new.

Maybe we could even mix in some Roman gods and goddesses to the mix just to spice things up. Y’know, a more modern refresher than the Helenes.

Cupiday! The day you shoot your loved one in the ass with an arrow!

Junoday, the day of the week where the only person on the planet allowed to say it out loud is Eugenio Suarez.

Apolloday! Wait, I said Roman gods here, not Greek gods. Damn it, why’s it always so complicated...

Plutoday! Or is that not really a day and actually just 24 consecutive hours lumped consecutively together that looks kind of day-like?

See, despite all the massive amounts of stupid out there, sometimes we manage to create plenty of it all by our lonesomes. Happy Friggin’ Friday, y’all, and cheers to the Friggin’ weekend.