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An incomplete list of baseball names you can sing to Van Halen’s “Panama”

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A second Friday List.

2020 Billboard Music Awards - Show Photo by Kevin Winter/BBMA2020/Getty Images for dcp

The world of Rock & Roll lost a titan earlier this month when Eddie Van Halen passed away. The guitar virtuoso was part maestro, part illuminator, pushing the genre forward in ways few had ever even begun to conjure.

Fuck cancer. Eddie was 65.

I have zero musical talent, and can give no audio homage to Eddie’s greatness. What I can do, in a very minuscule way, is do my bit part in keeping their music alive and rockin’, something I’m sure it will easily do whether I try or not.

Anyhoo, few jams get my skin crawling and my fist pumping like Panama, and in honor of that jam, here is an incomplete list of names you can sing to Van Halen’s Panama.

Adam Dunn

Tug McGraw

Gerrit Cole

Arky Vaughan

Travis Shaw!

Barry Bonds

Buddy Bell

Warren Spahn

Ryan Braun

Randy Wolf

Albert Belle

Tommy Bond

Rusty Staub

Whitey Ford

Tony Clark

Robin Yount

Noodles Hahn

Gene Tenace

Aaron Hill

Tommy John

David Cone

Jonny Gomes

Corey Hart

BRANDON MOSS

BRANDON MO-OSS

BRANDON MOSS!