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Farmers Only: Mass Hysteria!

Dogs & cats living together, pitchers hitting, hitters pitching....

Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports
  • Louisville took care of the IronPigs, 5-3, behind a quality start from Jon Moscot. The Muskrat surrendered 3 runs in 6 innings on 7 hits, and he was a little wild too, walking 4 to just 2 strikeouts, but he got the outs when he needed them, and the Bats got the win. Eugenio "Not the Bitey One" Suarez honked his fourth wangdoodle of the year, and Moscot helped himself out with 2 hits and 2 RBI. The pitchers came to hit today, as Pedro Villarreal, on for the 3-inning save (no hits, no runs, by the way), was 1-1 with an RBI as well. Huh. Up next: Dylan Axelrod (1-1, 2.10) takes on the IronPigs at 6:35.
  • Pensacola got walloped by the Generals, 15-4. All 4 Wahoo runs were a product of Kyle Waldrop, who hit a 3-run homer and a sac fly. Wandy Peralta, Layne "Taylor" Somsen, and Chad "Bad Neighbor" Rogers all gave up runs, and you know it's a bad game when a backup shortstop has the best pitching line of the night. Ray Chang pitched a perfect ninth inning, getting a groundout and 2 flyouts to make his teammates look bad. Up next: Keyvius Sampson (0-0, 2.25) faces Tennessee at 7:35.
  • Daytona fell to the Flying Tigers, 3-1, but I mean what do you expect when it's a friggin' turtle against a FLYING TIGER. SINCE WHEN CAN TIGERS FLY THIS IS TERRIFYING SOMEBODY TELL OBAMA. Chad "Beer Battered Alaskan" Wallach was 2-4 and Joe "Hawk" Hudson had the only XBH and RBI for the turts. Amir Garrett allowed a mere 4 hits in 6 innings, but 4 walks haunted, and 2 runs crossed, despite 5 Ks. Still, another solid start from the lanky lefty. Up next: Nick Howard takes on the Flying Tigers at the ass-crack of dawn (it's already started). Good luck with those airborne murderous cats, dudes.
  • Dayton bashed in the TinCaps, 5-1. The only thing I'd put up against a Flying Tiger is a Dragon, and yet the Dragons faced a cheap metal hat, and the turtles faced the winged jungle beasts. Something is off, here. Anywhoways, DJ Tejay Antone was pure filth for 7 innings, striking out 7 and walking none. He allowed just 1 run to cross on 7 hits. Nice. Ty Washington was killing for fun, going 3-4 with a 2-run shot, a double, and a chopped down cherry tree. Paul "Videodrome" Kronenfeld walked twice and had a solo wanger of his own. Brian "Bœuf" O'Grady stole his 12th base, but was also caught for the first time. Up next: The Varmint Seth Varner (3-1, 2.86) looks to put another dent in the TinCaps at 7.