Farmers Only Weekend Harvest: 5/15-5/17

LOUISVILLE

Friday - A Eugenio Suarez ding-dong gave the Bats the win, 5-4 against the G-Barves. Suarez (2-5) went deep in the top of the ninth after a pair of walks to Yorman Rodriguez and Chris Dominguez. Jon Moscot went 7 strong, allowing 2 runs on 7 hits with a walk and a couple of Ks, and Carlos Contreras struck out the side to the get the save.
Saturday - The Bats won again on Saturday, 3-1, in a game that featured two former Reds farmhands: Kanekoa Teixeira and Carlos Fisher. Did you guys know that Carlos Fisher's real name is Charles Edward Fisher? I didn't, and that's weird. Anyway, Dylan "Thomas" Axelrod allowed one run in 6 IP, with 3 walks and 3 K. Eugenio Suarez had another big game, going 3-4 with a walk and a steal, while Ryan "Outdoor Advertising" LaMarre was 2-3 with a triple and a steal of his own. Sam LeCure, Nick Christiani, and Nate Adcock closed it out with a scoreless inning apiece.
Sunday - Louisville closed out a winning weekend with a 7-4 win over the Barves on Sunday. Ivan "He's a Pederast, Donny" De Jesus was a perfect 3-3, and Jose De La Torre got the win despite recording the fewest outs of any Bats pitcher. This concludes today's edition of "pitcher wins are stoopy dumb," see you next time.
Up next - Josh Smith (0-0, 4.35) faces Norfolk at 6:35

PENSACOLA

Friday - The Wahoos snuffed the Suns on Friday, 3-1, thanks to 2-4 nights from the Three Brean Casserole (who added 2 RBI) and Marquez Smith. Jesse Winker was 1-2 with a walk, and Wandy Peralta tossed 6 3-hit innings.
Saturday - Keyvius Sampson was the tough-luck loser in a 1-0 loss to the M-Barves. "Long Hair Don't Care" Sampson allowed 1 run on 3 hits in 6 IP, walking 3 and striking out 5. Good to see him back healthy and dealing. Kyle "What's a" Skipworth was 2-3 with the only XBH of the game.
Sunday - The Wahoos tied it up in the bottom of the ninth on Sunday, but lost in the tenth to the Braves, 3-2. Only 5 hits for the good guys in this one. Tiny Tim Adelman was strong in 7 IP, giving up just 1 run, but Zach "Don't Take My Ad" Weiss took the loss in the tenth. Bah Humbug.
Up next - Robert Stephenson (1-4, 5.65) please please oh god please do well, when you face Mississippi at 7:35.

DAYTONA

Friday - A 2+ hour rain delay limited Amir Garrett to just 1/3 of an inning (with 1 K), as Daytona were thrashed by the Threshers, 6-2. Nick Routt took over for Garrett, and the rout was on. Well, not really, but he gave up 3 runs in 4.2 innings, and Evan "White Guy Name" Mitchell gave up 3 more in 2+ innings to follow. Taylor "Bubba" Sparks honked a 2-run Miss New Booty for the only Tortuga runs. I assume Garrett will toss a bullpen session sometime soon.
Saturday - The Tortugas tied it in the ninth on Saturday, but, like their brethren in the panhandle, lost it in the tenth to the Threshers by a score of 4-3. Alex "the Magnificent" Blandino was 3-5 and Jeff "Peanut Butter" Gelalich was 2-4 to lead the offense. Nick Howard pitched a scoreless inning in his first appearance out of the bullpen, but I'm not really sure why, unless they're trying to keep his innings down without telling us. Joel Bender blew it.
Sunday - The weekend sweep was avoided as the Turts beat Clearwater 4-2. Alex was Great again, going 3-4, and buddy cops Hudson & Gelalich each added 2 hits. The South rose again as Jackson Stephens tossed 7 1/3 scoreless innings, and El'Hajj Muhammad had to come on to clean up Joel Bender's stupid robot mess again, getting the save.
Up next - Krampus (2-3, 3.35) against Lakeland at 7:05

DAYTON

Friday - Dayton started the weekend right with a 3-2 win over Lake County. Luis Gonzalez (2-4) knocked in a pair to help the Dragons. Tejay "AJ RJ" Antone didn't seem to have his best stuff for 4+ innings, but limited the damage to 2 runs despite 6 hits and 3 walks.
Saturday - Saturday wasn't as kind to the Dragons, as they were doubled up by the Captains, 8-4. A 3-run homer from Jonathan Reynoso helped, and I noso because he accounted for 75% of Dayton's runs. Seth Varner increased his season walk total by 300% with his outing, as he lasted just 3.1 innings. He walked 3 (bringing his season total to 4), struck out 5, and allowed 6 runs/4 earned on 4 hits. Not his best performance.
Sunday - The Dragons got back in the win column with a 5-4 defeat of Lake County on Sunday. Mark "Stretch" Armstrong allowed 3 runs in 5 innings on just 4 hits, with 2 BB and 2 K. Avain Rachal hit a solo wanger, and the Dragons turned 10 singles (and 2 walks) into the remaining 4 runs. Reynoso (3-4) had another big game, and Garrett "Malware" Boulware was 2-3 with a walk.
Up next - Darth Mahle (2-3, 3.86) faces the Loons at 7.