My Five Predictions? Painful

It was February 20th. I was young, probably cold, and full of excitement at a new season. I was also really, really, dumb.

Here's the link to the original predictions I made. Only 12 comments were made, because you all were smart enough to avert your eyes. But in case you weren't, or you wanted to see them again...

Homer Bailey will win 20 games

Kinda hard to win 20 games when you only pitch in 23. Old Hoss was 9-5 with 11 starts left when he stopped making starts with an arm injury, so it's not even like he was on pace. After a rough first month he held folks to a 3.17 ERA on a .221/.289/.337 line, so maybe he was getting there. But hey, I also could've just misspelled "Johnny Cueto."

Joey Votto will hit 50 doubles

No, you shut up.

The Reds end the season hot

Well, in a way, 21-32 from August through September is way better than the 3-10 in the last couple of weeks of July.

Some reliever we love is traded for a very useful piece

Well, I think that "love" may be a bit strong to describe Broxton, but he was traded. And $11MM is a useful piece, in a way. A Shakleford and an Astin at least allow me the opportunity to tell dumb jokes about mid-2000s Reds. I appreciate that.

Ryan Ludwick is going to be cut

Ryan Ludwick was the third-best full-season bat for the Reds this season. He went .244/.308/.375.

Bonus: I will get out of dodge and move to the Weezst Coast

Two playoff teams and no hope. Gotta love the Bay Area.