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Farmers Only: Mommas don't let your babies grow up to play basketball.

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Seriously, it will ruin their lives and slow their development to be kick ass baseball players.

YOU THROW LIKE A GIRL
YOU THROW LIKE A GIRL

Louisville let the big dog eat Wednesday night and won against the Stranglers 3-2.  Holmdawg got the start and was effective (5.2 IP, 9 H, 2 ER, 1 BB, and 5 K).  Batters were making contact, but Dr. Zoidberg kept most of them from scoring.  The bullpen was dyn-o-mite, with five guys pitching 8.1 scoreless innings until the Bats put the winning run on the board in the 14th.  The Bats collected 13 walks in this game to only 7 hits, and only pushed across 2 runs.  Jason Bourgeois was 1 for 5 with 2 runs scored and 2 walks.  Neftali Soto had 2 singles and 2 walks in 4 at bats. J Smitty is on the mound tonight.

In the weirdest thing that has happened this season, which is saying something because this season has been stoopy dumb, the Pensacola game was suspended in the top of the 9th inning because of a power outage.  This happened to Bakersfield last week.  I think Bob needs to cut the minor league affiliates a big banana check to keep the fields illuminated.

Pensacola was losing 3-4 when all hell broke loose and Bayfront Stadium descended into dark madness.  Pensacola was probably being really sneaky because Mobile was about to extend their lead with runners on 2nd and 3rd and only one out.  As long as they don't bunt, they'll probably score runs, right?  I think.  Jon Moscot had a very Jon Moscot start (6 IP, 7 H, 2 ER, 0 BB, 6 K, 1 HR).  Kyle McMyne pitched 2 scoreless innings with 2 strikeouts.  Shane Dyer entered in the 9th to pick up the save and decided to be a shit head, so the lights went off.  Yorman Rodriguez had a double and a walk, and Ryan Wright and Moose Mattair picked up the big RBI's in the 8th inning.  The game will finish today if the Wahoos will allow it.  I'm assuming they just pulled a plug somewhere and aren't telling anyone about it.

Bakersfield got trounced by a score of 11-8.  Drew Cisco tried to have a dance party, but someone dumped a trashcan full of cold water on his head (4 IP, 8 H, 5 R, 4 ER, 2 BB, 4 K, 1 HR).  Sean Lucas pitched 2 scoreless innings with 3 strikeouts, and El'Hajj Muhammad basically did the opposite of good.  Beau Amaral went 3 for 5 with a double, and Vincej, Gelalich, and Hudson all had multi-hit games.  Marquez Smith hit his 25th homerun of the year, and because 2014'd this is just getting ridiculous.  He also had 2 walks.  Seabass Elizalde and Joe Hudson contributed with solo shots.

Dayton got the best of Lake County, winning 6-0 in 7 innings.  I'm assuming it rained, and that's why this happened.  The people of Eastlake, Ohio are too classy to just cut the power.  Yeah, bullshit.  This is Cleveland we're talking about.  They set their rivers on fire.  Amir Garrett doesn't play basketball anymore, so now he is a pretty good baseball player.  Listen to your mother and play baseball.  He pitched a 7 inning complete game shutout, giving up 3 hits, 1 BB, and 12 freaking strikeouts.  I think he figured out baseballs are small than basketballs, and some science shit happened then strikeouts.  I'll run an experiment later.  The Great Blandino went 2 for 4 with a double, and Big Bob Ramirez hit a 3 run shot in the 3rd inning.  He also contributed a sacrifice fly.

Billings had their game banged because of rain against Grand Junction.  Twitter speculation is a thunderstorm spooked a horse, which spilled an apple cart.  Mrs. O'Leary's cow went all hooves over udders when it slipped on those damn apples and landed on a transformer.  So, we had our third power outage of the day.  I also heard it caused a giant pile up on the grandest of junctions in Grand Junction.  No one knows a dead traffic light turns into a four way because people are totes dumb.  I heard FEMA was called in to pick up the cow and clean up the apples.  They really want to see Santa Krauss pitch tonight.

The AZL Reds lost to the AZL Rangers 8-6.  Juan Martinez got the start and didn't record an out, but gave up 3 runs. Israel "Bomb" Cuevas (which kind of funny if you know what Cuevas is in Spanish) pitched 5 scoreless in relief with 2 strikeouts.  Junior Felix "KITTEH" Arias started in center field and had a walk.  Reydel "Rotel" Medina had 2 hits in 4 at bats.  Shane Mardirosian had a double, 2 RBI, and a walk.  Lots of clutchiness in this game, apparently.