clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

This Week in JPEGs: The Golem of Cincinnati, Corky Crushes Callaspo, and Mat Latos, Bully at the Municipal Pool

This week's themes are aggression and domination.

Yadi Molina is Injured
Yadi Molina is Injured
picture courtesy of me, you idiots

Another week, another week in JPEGs. Last week's favorite JPEG was titled Yadi Molina is Injured and it was basically another joke about him being a toilet. This feature figures to get a ton of mileage out of that.

Earlier this week, I kind of downplayed the drama of that unfortunate weekend series against the Cardinals. But deep down, primal feelings of anger and fear pervaded. I think that really comes out in this week's set of JPEGs as expressions of aggression and domination. It's an interesting study of the male psyche, as even a well-educated and cultured man like myself (/wipes nose on sleeve) will often respond to frustration with violence, and moreover, will project those feelings onto others in attempt to justify them. It all has kind of a Fin-de-siècle expressionist brutality vibe, I think. (/scratches wax out of ear)

On to the JPEGs.

The Golem of Cincinnati

The legend of the golem figures prominent in Jewish folklore. Many stories involving the monster have been told through the generations. The most popular of these tales is the Golem of Prague, conjured by the rabbi to protect the Jewish ghetto from pogroms and antisemitic onslaughts. The rabbi sculpted the golem out of mud from the riverbank, creating an imposing inhuman being meant to strike fear into the hearts of those that wished the harm them. If you grew up reading Frankenstein, this is basically Frankenstein.

Deep in the bowels of Great American Ballpark, local rabbis have been hard at work creating their own golem. He is meant to protect the good people of Reds country from the evil machinations of their NL Central foes. Last Saturday, the golem was released on the menacing St. Louis Cardinals. He hit two home runs.


Corky Crushes Callaspo

In the top of the fourth inning of Wednesday's afternoon tilt with the A's, Steven Vogt rapped a single into right field. Brandon Moss scored from third and Alberto Callaspo came around from second. Jay Bruce made an amazing throw and Corky Miller blocked the plate like a cement block wall. Callaspo didn't have a chance.


Callaspo hurt himself pretty good on the play because it was basically like he rode his bike off a cliff and then when he hit the bottom like 500 feet below he bounced over another cliff and fell another 800 feet and then instead of landing on rocks at the bottom he landed on metal spikes. Like sharp metal spikes.

Corky also hit a pair of doubles.

Mat Latos, Bully at the Municipal Pool

In Tuesday's game against the A's, Mat Latos was downright abusive. He pitched 7 shutout innings, giving up only four hits. It was like Latos is the kid at the pool who hit puberty way before everyone else and delights in picking on all the smaller kids. This JPEG depicts Mat holding a pair of A's players under the water far longer than could be described as playful. The Reds won and the A's just need to stop whining and quit being a baby. He was just playing. Gosh.