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This week in JPEGs: D-Robbed, Votto's Reaction, and Corky Returns

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From executive producer Howie Mandel

picture courtesy of me, you idiots

It's This Week in JPEGs! That is what this is! It is something, and that something is This Week in JPEGs! [applause]

Last week's winner, titled Homer Slays Goliath, commemorated Homer Bailey's no-hitter against the Giants. It garnered 50% of your votes.

This week, we look back at the highlights from series against the Mariners and Brewers. But really, just the Brewers. Because that was more interesting, I guess.

D-Robbed: Like Family Circus or Something

In Tuesday's tilt in Milwaukee, the Reds were shut out by Wily "Mas Pelotas" Peralta, eliciting scoffs and furrowed brows from the Red Reporter illiterariat. The closest the Reds would get to plating a run came in the top of the seventh when Derrick Robinson sliced a liner down the left field line. It bounded away from Jeff Bianchi and Robinson was able to motor all the way around the bases. He dove head-first into home and was able to get his hand in before the tag, but the umpire blew the close call. Here's a rendering of how it all played out.


Joey Votto's Reaction

It was a pretty rough series in Milwaukee, and our next featurette is of yet another home run robbery. This time, the victim was Joey Votto. The culprit - Carlos Gomez. In Monday's game, with two outs in the top of the ninth, Joey stepped to the plate with a runner on. A home run would give the Reds a one-run lead. Votto absolutely crushed it to deep center field, a towering moonshot with just enough distance to clear the wall. But Carlos Gomez made a great play to leap up and pull it back. Votto was apoplectic.


It sucked.

Corky Returns - The Return of Corky

The Reds' catching corps has been sore up all week. Ryan Hanigan has been battling a sore wrist and Devin Mesoraco has been struggling with a balky back. Times got tough. We felt alone. It was like we didn't know what to do, but then we all knew exactly what to do. So the Reds called Corky.


The Moustachioed Manslayer tagged in for the ailing Hanigan and entered the ring to the booming, arena-shaking howls of the sanguine crowd. "All better," he muttered under his breath. The whisper registered a 5.4 on the Richter scale.