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Last week's JPEG o' tha Week was titled Cingrani's Terrifying Pitch Face. It earned an impressive 78% of your votes and, even more impressively, haunted 86% of your children's dreams. This will undoubtedly cause years and years of ADHD, asthma, seasonal allergies, and irritable bowel syndrome in every one of them. Good luck dealing with all that.
This past week was a relatively quiet one for the Reds as they enjoyed not one but two off-days while touring the West Coast. This week's entrants are as follows:
Snakebit Chapman
Aroldis Chapman had a rough go of it in the desert. Too bad the Diamondbacks don't play in the dessert, because that would probably have been sweeter for the Reds' closer. Instead, it was poisonous.
Chapman blew the save on Saturday, giving up a pair of walks and a pair of singles without recording a single out. Aye, Chihuahua. He nearly blew the save on Sunday, too, surrendering a run before ultimately closing it out.
Jay Bruce's Golden Sombrero
On Wednesday in Oakland, the Reds ran into the buzzsaw of A.J. Griffin. The pitcher with the name that sounds like the hip urban friend on an early '90s sitcom (say whaaaat??!!) recorded seven strikeouts, whiffing Jay Bruce four times. Bruce may have earned the Golden Sombrero, but he sure looked good in it.
Look at the smile. And that chiseled jaw line. And those piercing blue eyes. Who could stay mad at this guy? He looks like a superhero. [SEAMLESS TRANSITION]
Reds Go See Man of Steel
With two off-days this week, the Reds had plenty of free time on their hands. Off-days on road trips are weird, because when you get an off day you usually want to spend it resting. But when you are out of town, you can't really just stay cooped up in the hotel all day. So some of the guys saw the new Superman movie.
They thought it was okay. Superman can get so preachy, though.
Vote 'em up!