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There were other games happening today, but last night is re-running on Red Reporter 2, Red Reporter News and CRedReporter.
Top of the 1st
Brandon Phillips pops out to catcher Buster Posey in foul territory.
Zack Cozart called out on strikes.
Joey Votto strikes out swinging.
Not my favorite start to a game. Partly because I don't have enough snacks. By the first pitch, you should have a healthy and unhealthy snack in position - one for celebration, the other for self-flagellation or de-guilting from excessive celebration.
Bumgarner - who was called a "slingballer" by TBS - is painting at this point and living up to his name by "garnering" "bum" calls on the innermost reaches of the Ball Zone. He also fed Joey Votto all fastballs during his at bat, which I personally guaranteed he would not be able to do.
From the thread:
"He's a slingblader"
did they just call Bumgarner retarded?
by Cy Schourek on Oct 7, 2012 6:41 PM PDT 3 recs
Bottom of the 1st
Angel Pagan flies out to right fielder Jay Bruce.
Marco Scutaro lines out to center fielder Drew Stubbs.
Pablo Sandoval flies out to right fielder Jay Bruce.
Nice little inning, but a little bit scary. Arroyo makes me nervous when he's spraying liners and fly balls, especially Pagan's "Cincinnati HR" to lead off the inning. But maybe Bronson is just stretching out and exploring the space. You'll be forgiven for thinking this park was specifically designed for him, combine with boat access and the phallic coke bottle/yonic catcher's mitt imagery.
Top of the 2nd
Ryan Ludwick homers (1) on a fly ball to center field.
My approval rating for this play is very high. Probably 100%. It's Ludwick's first post-season HR in 18 PAs. Ludwick was 3rd in the NL in "no doubt" HRs this season and this one would have done Gwen Stefani proud.
From the thread:
WHO CALLED LUDWICK SMASH???
INVEST MY MONEY, YOU GENIUS!
Please do not leave your money lying around in the thread.
Jay Bruce grounds out, first baseman Brandon Belt to pitcher Madison Bumgarner.
Scott Rolen walks.
Coaching visit to mound.
Ryan Hanigan strikes out swinging.
Drew Stubbs lines out to first baseman Brandon Belt.
I'm afraid of eating my words here about Stubbs flailing against Cain, but handling Bumgarner.
Bottom of the 2nd
Buster Posey grounds out, shortstop Zack Cozart to first baseman Joey Votto.
Hunter Pence lines out to second baseman Brandon Phillips.
Brandon Belt strikes out swinging.
It has to be frustrating to realize the opposing pitcher is setting you down in order while topping out at 89. And is not also R.A. Dickey.
Top of the 3rd
Bronson Arroyo grounds out, shortstop Brandon Crawford to first baseman Brandon Belt.
Brandon Phillips lines out to right fielder Hunter Pence.
Zack Cozart strikes out on a foul tip.
This was a three Brandon inning, with a Bronson for good measure. There's rarely this kind of B-son density West of the Mississip'.
Bottom of the 3rd
Gregor Blanco called out on strikes.
Brandon Crawford strikes out swinging.
Madison Bumgarner strikes out swinging.
Nine straight outs for Arroyo and four Ks in a row. One of his curveballs that inning was dangerously close to being below 70 miles per hour. He's capable of greatness, but probably most baseball fans think of Arroyo on the level of being a bobblehead with a worn-out spring they come across at Goodwill, rather than a franchise player:
I was cleaning out the closet this wekend
and wondered what to do w/ my Arroyo bobblehead… Told Mrs Nlt-andrew if Arroyo wins it gets to stay, if he loses..off to goodwill. If he keeps this up it just might get a shrine in the living room.
Top of the 4th
Joey Votto singles on a ground ball to center fielder Angel Pagan.
Ryan Ludwick singles on a line drive to center fielder Angel Pagan. Joey Votto to 2nd.
Jay Bruce pops out to third baseman Pablo Sandoval in foul territory.
Scott Rolen singles on a line drive to right fielder Hunter Pence. Joey Votto scores. Ryan Ludwick to 3rd. Scott Rolen to 2nd on the throw.
Coaching visit to mound.
Ryan Hanigan singles on a ground ball to center fielder Angel Pagan. Ryan Ludwick scores. Scott Rolen scores.
Drew Stubbs grounds into a force out, second baseman Marco Scutaro to shortstop Brandon Crawford. Ryan Hanigan out at 2nd. Drew Stubbs to 1st.
Bronson Arroyo flies out to right fielder Hunter Pence.
These were all singles, which is a little bit impressive. The Reds fan inside wants to find something wrong with this, so starts thinking about this kind of offense not flying in single-suppressing GABP. But: the Reds are also hitting for some power.
I can't seem to poke any holes in this incredibly carnival of pleasures.
Bottom of the 4th
Angel Pagan grounds out, second baseman Brandon Phillips to first baseman Joey Votto.
Marco Scutaro grounds out, pitcher Bronson Arroyo to first baseman Joey Votto.
Pablo Sandoval grounds out, shortstop Zack Cozart to first baseman Joey Votto.
I've eaten through my Mallomars at this point. I think Arroyo threw a curveball in this inning that Marco Scutaro hit with the air around his bat.
Top of the 5
Brandon Phillips grounds out, third baseman Pablo Sandoval to first baseman Brandon Belt.
Zack Cozart singles on a line drive to left fielder Gregor Blanco.
Joey Votto singles on a ground ball to left fielder Gregor Blanco. Zack Cozart to 2nd.
Pitching Change: George Kontos replaces Madison Bumgarner, batting 9th.
Coaching visit to mound.
Ryan Ludwick grounds into a double play, shortstop Brandon Crawford to second baseman Marco Scutaro to first baseman Brandon Belt. Joey Votto out at 2nd.
Another in a long string of apologies to Ryan Ludwick, I expressed regret for calling him CrudPrick this inning. But I'm not sorry. It was a term of endearment. These days, even grounding into a double pay he's endearing.
Somewhere in here, TBS showed footage of Buster Posey having his leg unhinged. This was, as Cy Schourek so accurately described it, a "dick move."
Bottom of the 5
Buster Posey grounds out, shortstop Zack Cozart to first baseman Joey Votto.
Hunter Pence grounds out, third baseman Scott Rolen to first baseman Joey Votto.
Brandon Belt singles on a line drive to center fielder Drew Stubbs.
Gregor Blanco grounds out, third baseman Scott Rolen to first baseman Joey Votto.
Brandon Belt scuttles perfection by singling on an 89 mph sinker. We got greedy expecting this game to be historically mind-blowing, rather than just mind-blowing. It's like drinking: know your limits and settle for very buzzed, rather than Boris Yeltsin. You can avoid getting sick that way.
Speaking of which. Even though it was Sunday, there was an air of intoxication on here and on Twitter. Let's skip to the best part:
Top of the 8th
Pitching Change: Jose Mijares replaces Tim Lincecum, batting 7th.Joey Votto singles on a ground ball to right fielder Hunter Pence.
Ryan Ludwick walks. Joey Votto to 2nd.
Coaching visit to mound.
Offensive Substitution: Pinch-runner Chris Heisey replaces Ryan Ludwick.
Jay Bruce doubles (2) on a line drive to right fielder Hunter Pence. Joey Votto scores. Chris Heisey scores.
Pitching Change: Santiago Casilla replaces Jose Mijares, batting 7th.
Coaching visit to mound.
Scott Rolen flies out to right fielder Hunter Pence.
Pitching Change: Guillermo Mota replaces Santiago Casilla, batting 7th.
Coaching visit to mound.
Ryan Hanigan singles on a ground ball to center fielder Angel Pagan. Jay Bruce scores.
Drew Stubbs triples (1) on a fly ball to center fielder Angel Pagan. Ryan Hanigan scores.
Bronson Arroyo strikes out swinging.
Brandon Phillips doubles (2) on a line drive to left fielder Xavier Nady. Drew Stubbs scores.
Offensive Substitution: Pinch-hitter Wilson Valdez replaces Zack Cozart.
Wilson Valdez flies out to right fielder Hunter Pence.
The really wild thing was that within the space of an inning, the Reds went from playing for Game 2 of a playoff series to running the scrubs out there.
AT&T Park starting emptying out after that. We were triumphal, but still haven't gotten the hang of rubbing it in:
yeah! go home to your awesome Asian food and great microbrews!
Get the hell outta here and go hang out at your waterfront and bridge and go play in your silicon valley money!
by Cy Schourek on Oct 7, 2012 9:05 PM PDT 5 recs
The offensive outporing was capped with probably the most-rec'd comment of the evening, quite possibly the most -rec'd wildlife allegory in Red Reporter history:
Reds offense in September
Reds offense in October
and this
and then this
by Nasty N8 on Oct 7, 2012 9:06 PM PDT 9 recs
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That's where we should leave it.