Set to the tune of "Canyonero", from The Simpsons:
Can you name the pitcher that throws 105
He can strike out nearly any man alive
He throws that slider to drop the hammer down
He makes any hitter look like a clown
He's the new shut down reliever for your first place team
He's a Cardinal-crushin', Cub-stompin' pitching machine
Always looking on the dark side
Though it is incredible to hear that the Reds have gained 9 games in the standings in just 20 days, we must also remember that there are 30 days left in the season. The Cardinals still have a glimmer of hope that they can salvage the season and make an improbable comeback, but that can be throttled out of them with a strong showing this weekend. It is a great comfort to know that at the absolute worst, the Reds come out of this series with a 5 game lead. But let's make it 11 instead, eh?
Joey Votto is not the only Red climbing to the top of the leaderboards
Old fan-favorite and ransom demand in the Willy Taveras deal Adam Rosales is one of the fastest home run trotters in the league, but Chris Heisey is working hard to change the hearts and minds of Reds fans who miss his goofy smile and aww-shucksisms. Tony Gwynn Jr is the home run trot leader coming down the home stretch, but two of his are inside-the-parkers, so they shouldn't really count.
Jayson Stark has Joey Votto atop his NL MVP ballot as of right now
With the caveat that anything can happen in the last month of the season. "Without Albert Pujols, the Cardinals are done -- but you could say that every year," one NL scout said. "So what you've got to decide is if anybody else has truly superseded him." That's never a fun call to make. But if the Cardinals keep fading, it could turn out to be easier than usual. Or not."
The problem with this logic is that the MVP award is not about the last 10 years, or even the last 2. Sure, Albert Pujols is the greatest hitter of this generation. But the 2010 MVP isn't a generational award, it's just for this season. And this season, Joey Votto has been better. Not much better of course, but enough to make the decision. The final month of the season can change things, obviously, but right now for 2010 Votto is the man.
Perhaps the more interesting section of this article is his synopsis of the AL Cy Young race. Stark picks Felix Hernandez, he of the lowly Mariners and the owner of a 10-10 record as this Reposter went to press. How can a pitcher with a .500 record even be considered for such an award!!??? Kudos to Stark for getting it, but the rest of the voters won't. CC Sabathia isn't a bad choice (he'll most likely join that exclusive club of African-American 20-game winners this season) but King Felix is this year's Zack Greinke.
Though park attendence is taking its traditional back-to-school dip
TV ratings are setting new records. The game Wednesday night got a 12.76 rating in the Cincinnati area, which is good or something. Viewership peaked at 18.31 when So You Think You Can Embarrass Yourself? went to commercial break.
Baseball Prospectus, that august publication, has updated their NL power rankings
Your Reds are currently running 3rd behind the Braves and Padres. "The week was perfect for the Reds, as they won five straight at the same time the Cardinals lost four in a row, expanding a lead that was already depressing St. Louis' fans to eight games. They can all but eliminate the Cards with a strong showing this weekend, as they play them in a three-game set at St. Louis. The biggest news of the week was Aroldis Chapman making his debut and hitting 103 mph with his fastball, striking out three batters in two innings in two perfect innings. He may be just what the Reds bullpen (ranked 11th in WXRL) needs for October."
The Red Hall of Fame and Museum continues their summer of celebrating the controversial figures of Reds past
Last month's Marge Schott bobblehead turned some heads, so this month the Museum is giving away limited edition lithographs of erstwhile baseball god Pete Rose. The first 5,000 fans to visit the museum this month will receive the free gift, which is in commemoration of the 25th anniversary of Rose's eclipse of fellow doosh Ty Cobb's hit record.
Doug Gray gives us a pitch F/X breakdown of every one of Aroldis Chapman's pitches so far
Every single slider he has thrown so far has resulted in a strike. I have nothing left to say.