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Meet the Red Reporters, or, Who is Fat Vegas Alan really?

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Nopony_medium

Today's an off-day, and I thought it'd be a good time to resurrect one of my favorite open threads from back in the day: Meet your fellow Red Reporters. This one from a couple years ago was my real introduction to a lot of you folks, and I know that I was a lot more uncomfortable and awkward around here back then. Also, I don't think more than a dozen or so folks from back then are still around, so it's a totally different community. Semi-formal introductions might be in order.

You certainly don't have to participate, but the more the merrier. If you don't find it too creepy to indulge some information about yourself, answer a few of these questions:

1. Real first name?
2. Where do you live?
3. Where did you grow up?
4. How many times have you been divorced?
5. What's your line?
6. How did you find Red Reporter?
7. Favorite players?
8. Anything else interesting about you?

Also, if anyone would be so bold as to post their favorite pictures of their kids, that certainly fits within the rules.