This Week in JPEGs - Atlanta is a dumb place

Picture courtesy of me, you idiots

Atlanta is a dumb AND stupid place.

Last week's JPEG o' the Week is titled, The Dread Pirate McCutchen. It just edged the competition, probably through nefarious or dastardly means. That guy, huh?

This week, the Reds went to Atlanta and got swept the heck right out of town. It was pretty dumb.

Hooversaurus Wrecks

Sunday afternoon's game in Atlanta was really something. Johnny Cueto and Julio Teheran put on dueling master classes in GETTING SHIT DONE. The pair dueled for the first eight innings, combining to strike out 16 while surrendering only six hits. These kinds of pitchers duels are my absolute favorite games. It's a thing of beauty when two pitchers are the top of their respective games and every at-bat is charged with win-or-lose drama.

The game was scoreless into the 10th inning when J.J. Hoover came in to pitch. He sat down the first two batters in short order because he's nasty out there, but then Jason Heyward singled up the middle. BuhJupton smacked his first pitch up the middle right at Hoover. A man with proportionally lengthed arms would have snagged it easily, but the Hoov has little bitty T-Rex arms and the ball bounded off his glove. Manny Parra then came in to face Freddie Freeman and that was the ball game.

Hooversaurus_wrecks_medium

Barves' Fans Tomahawk Chop at Every Stupid Thing

Every year the Reds road trip to Atlanta, and every year Braves' fans irritate the metaphorical heck right out of me. They do that stupid Tomahawk Chop at damn near everything, which is irritating. The overt racist caricaturing is just icing on top. Barves' fans are dumb. Atlanta is dumb.

Duhmahawk_chop_medium

NERTS NERTS NERTS NERTS

Brayan Peña has been outstanding in his first month as a Red. Not only has he been hitting like an animal (146 OPS+), but he is, by all accounts, a totally radical and bodacious dudemeister. For those who are uniNERTSiated, the whole NERTS thing originated last season when he was with the Tigers. He hit his first two home runs as a Red this week, so I drew a picture.

Nertshomers_medium

X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Red Reporter

You must be a member of Red Reporter to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Red Reporter. You should read them.

Join Red Reporter

You must be a member of Red Reporter to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Red Reporter. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9351_tracker