Mr Redlegs and Ronny Cedeno engage in a titanic staring contest/battle of wits
The Joe Nuxhall Memorial Honorary Star of the Game
You go 0-4 with a walk and a 290 ft flyout to left, you win the JNMHSotG. That's just the rule, man. In what was an otherwise forgettable game for Votto, he came through in the bottom of the 13th with a walkoff sac fly to plate Jack Hannahan. Shin Soo Choo did the real work early in the inning with a double to center, but again, Votto won the game. He gets the award.
Honorable mentions go to Xavier Paul, who Vista'd the ball to left for a 2 run homer in the 8th, and Mike Leake, who managed to mess around and got a triple-double (or a two run, 6 hit, 3 walk performance. Same difference.) Props also go to the bullpen, who did nice work in not allowing a run in 5 innings of work. Although, this was the Padres, who started someone named Jaff Decker in left. Presumably, he was talking time off from hunting Boggs Benny.
Dishonorable mentions go to Cesar Izturis, who can't throw the fucking ball. Dick
- Nothing (two run sac fly for the Pads in the first, aided by the aforementioned superfluous shortstop)
- Nada (Reds hitters swing. . .and miss)
- Zilch (KMiB starts to drink)
- Nope (sMarty presumably tried to set Jay Bruce on fire)
- What do you think? (If it was a Reds run, may I interest you in some power bracelets?)
- REDS RUNS!!!!! (XP two run homer. Kelch actually raised his voice, almost giving Reds Country a heart attack)
- Chapman came in in the ninth and caused mass panic by only throwing 95. This caused Paul Lessard to rush out and ask if he needed to call an ambulance. Chapman ole'd him back to the dugout and struck out the side.
- The Pads tried their best in extras, but their best unfortunately involved pinch hitting Mark Kotsay at one point. Miguel Cairo thinks he should hang it up
- Votto finally ended the misery in the 13th. Reds Win (KMiB stops drinking. We think)
FanGraph Section That Makes Them Say Uhhh Na Na Na Na
- Reds gained a game on the Pirates today, who got swept by the Rockies. I have no words for that.
- Ludwick time tomorrow. He still has the best OBP in the majors. Take that, Cabrera
- The song referenced in the title, but I'm sure you all got it.
- These guys are from Toronto, and make jazz covers of hip hop songs. If that sounds too Williamsburg-Skinny Jeans to you, I promise, they're good.
- Go with god, my people