This Funk Now Smells Funky. Padres 2, Reds 1.

Your offense, ladies and gents. Go laugh at April 2013 you. - Christopher Hanewinckel-USA TODA

When you try to fake the funk on a nasty dunk, you get funkin' dunked on. That's law.

When the Funk hits your junk like a trunk full of gunk, you just have to funk right back on down.

The Joe Nuxhall Memorial Honorary Star of the Game

Mike Leake returned to the city of his city of his birth, and despite a few funky innings early, he settled right in and jibby jabbed his was through 7 innings of shutout baseball. Groovy. Leake just continues to do the damn thing, and do it well, and he lowered his season ERA to 2.59 in the process. Our resident former Casa Arroyo resident scattered 4 hits and just 2 walks over his 7 scoreless frames, and struck out 5 Padres in the process. It wasn't glamorous, but it was insanely effective yet again, which seems to be what we can routinely expect from him these days.

Honorable Mentions are due to: Derrick Robinson, whose triple led to the only run of the game for the Reds; Jay Bruce, who went 2 for 3 with a walk; and Joey Votto, because going 2 for 4 with a single and a double is good enough to seem great with this offense.

Key Plays

  • I'm not going to bore you with the Reds offense. They scored a run or something for the first time since the Reagan administration, but the Obama administration may reverse that run and actually charge the Reds with a run allowed instead. Or something. Politics. Yay independents!
  • In the Bottom of the 9th, Aroldis Chapman was asked to shake off the cobwebs and emerge from his it's-not-even-winter hibernation, and yeah, it didn't go so well. Chapman promptly walked former Red Yonder Alonso, and then allowed a first-pitch HR from, you guessed it, former Red Chris Denorfia. Reds lose, 2-1.

FanGraph Section That Makes Certain Ban'd Trolls Feel Like They're Climbing the Rope in Gym Class

Source: FanGraphs

Other Notes

  • If I'd told you before the season started that the Reds would start Derrick Robinson, Cesar Izturis, Zack Cozart, and Xavier Paul in the same game, would you have been surprised to find they'd score a single run and lose?
  • Shin-Soo Choo has an issue with his ankle after he slid awkwardly into 2B following a stolen base in the series finale against the Dodgers, hence his non-start. Brandon Phillips is sitting because, well, as much as it pains me to say so, he needs to for a day or two.
  • Reds pitchers have now allowed just 32 runs in the 12 games since the All-Star break, and the Reds are just 6-6 in those games.
  • Aroldis Chapman made just his 4th appearance in a game since June 14th; just an idea, but if they're going to restrict him to appearing just once every 5 days, then #LETHIMSTART. The man's too strong to sit and rot in the dark recesses of ballparks around the country.
  • Funkin' A? Funkin' A. When it smells funky, fight funk with funk. That's how you win. That's how I win. That's how the Reds win. Don't believe me? Ask George. Believe me, he and Bootsy know we want it.

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