It's time for the Home Run Derby, baseball fans. It's like the NBA's slam dunk contest, the NHL's backflips-on-ice-skates competition, and the NFL's beercan-crushing-on-forehead game. It is a mainline of the biggest thing in the game. It's baseball with all the real basebally parts taken out. It's cool, but yeah, I'm glad they only do it once a year.
The lineups feature no Reds.
Robinson Cano (captain)
David Wright (captain)
I'm kind of excited to see Chris Davis and Yoenis Cespedes. Davis is leading the galaxy in home runs, with like a jillion home runs so far this year. Cespedes is like the West Coast outfielder version of Aroldis Chapman. Which is to say, they are both Cuban and have little else in common.
David Wright is a terrible team captain. Mike Cuddyer and Pedro Alvarez? More like NOTional League, amirite?
So who you got? How many shumbazzlers you think they'll trolliwonk tonight?