Red Reposter: I'm Imagining The Waves of Blood Rushing Over Me

Ramadan Kareem, Derrick! - USA TODAY Sports

You ever wake up in the middle of a bad dream, then realize it's mostly true, and try to get back to sleep? Yeah, like that.

This will be a quick one because I don't really have time for a long one, and there's not much to say. This team is down to zero catchers and maybe some cobbled together Frankenstein's monster of a left-fielder. But hey, the rotation is looking good!

The headline is from the wonderful Reddit thread, "What is the creepiest thing that your child has ever said to you?" I'm sure you all have competitive sayings from your kids as well.

Broxton and Marshall are both coming back soon, sayeth the Fay. He says the Reds don't need any real bullpen depth going forward in the season, and I agree. There was a nasty, volatile, week back there, but they're generally looking good. The pitching of this team is some of the best in baseball, bless their hearts.

Cingrani's getting famous. He gets both the Maggie Zahneis treatment and the Carson Cistuli treatment. Cistuli is disappointed that Cinnerman is not quite as Italian as his name may lead one to believe (he's more of the Chicago-ethnic-white variety. I'm honestly bummed out that he talks with more of a disdainful bass than a clipped "sz"-, "dzj"- and "czh"-ful Chicago accent). I do love that Tony Spaghetti is from Oak Lawn, whose other famous natives include Pat Sajak, Kanye West, Rob Mackowiack, Dwyane Wade, and Lord of the Dance Michael Flatley. Can you imagine all of those people hanging out in the same Elks lodge?

Heisey left last night's game after getting hit by a pitch in the elbow. Gross!

"A lot of guys in our lineup are banged up," Phillips said. "We have a lot of people playing with injuries. Once everybody is on the same page and gets it going, and everybody is healthy, we'll be all right. We're not panicking. We'll be all right. That's how I see it. I'm not really trippin'. I know we're not winning. Nobody is really hitting the ball. Nobody is really standing out. Something has to turn up."

Let's hope for health, the All-Star Break, and not a few winning streaks soon enough.

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