Longtime lurker and infrequent (?) commenter RussellMeTimber posed the question to Grahamophone about the best way to spend $20 at the ballpark. I figured I'd do a little research and let you know how some of your favorite Cincinnati Reds would spend $20 at the ballpark, if they had the chance.
JAY BRUCE: Two cheese coneys with mustard/onions. Coke Zero, light ice.
BRONSON ARROYO: 3 Vodka-Red Bulls for Krystle in Section 124, Row E, Seat 4 whose "INSATIABLE" tramp stamp tattoo caught his eye between innings and who he's pretty sure doesn't have the clap anymore.
AROLDIS CHAPMAN: 5 Cream Cheese and Guava Pastries, to be eaten immediately upon removal of packaging.
CORKY MILLER: 4 leather keychains at the souvenir stand, to be eaten immediately upon removal of packaging.
BRANDON PHILLIPS: Lil Debbies #snackcakes #shawty for all my #BPDebbiesShawty #yall #SWaG #YOLO bruh.
TODD FRAZIER: Cinnamon Toast Crunch
SHIN-SOO CHOO: It doesn't matter, because the vendors would somehow hit him with it and then claim he crowds the counter.
DONALD LUTZ: um, wurst. Duh. Ja vohl.
TONY CINGRANI: Raw meat, because obviously.
HOMER BAILEY: A souvenir baseball bat, which he would then whittle into a bow, shoot a pigeon, and eat that.
JOEY VOTTO: 5 loaves of bread and 2 fried fish sandwiches, which he would use to feed the entire stadium.