It's Friday afternoon, so let's get our brains a-goin' with a sensible, nutritious number lunch.

Is Jay Bruce a creation of Great American Ball Park?

.277/.352/.542 // .234/.307/.416

Kevin Mitchell is Batman brought this up a few days ago. Those numbers represent The Bruiser's home/road splits over his entire career to date. As you can see, he is a formidable hitter, an all-star caliber hitter even, when he plays his baseball on the home court. On the road though, he is a decidedly below-average one. What is going on here?

Hold on though - it gets even weirder. His component stats are almost exactly identical at home as on the road. Almost:

Check that out. The same number of PAs, 2Bs, 3Bs, 1Bs, BBs, and Ks. Almost the entire disparity between his home and road numbers is the amount of home runs he's hit (I've bolded and italicized that one for you). So the simple and obvious explanation would be that he takes full advantage of the short porch in RF at GABP. Right?

Actually, no. That really doesn't seem to be the case. Using Home Run Tracker, I sorted through Bruce's career home runs to count how many were hit at Great American Ball Park and also would not have been a home run in more than half of the other parks in the league. Of the 117 career home runs he's hit and 71 at GABP, only 14 have been of this variety. When he hits the ball, he hits it hard. And it doesn't matter that the dimensions of GABP are favorable for him.

So basically, he hits far more home runs at GABP than on the road, but the home runs he hits there would be home runs anywhere else most of the time. I dunno, man. Maybe he just really wants to win that Tundra.

3B Todd Frazier's 3Bs

The Toddfather has hit four triples already on the season, which is double the number that second place Zack Cozart has hit. Frazier has done it in half the PAs, though. He's doing absolutely everything in his power to claim third base as his own, even resorting to hitting baseballs in such a way that produces a result that shows up in the boxscore in a way that is only tangentially related to the defensive position.

Drew Stubbs returns, doesn't miss a beat

Stubbs has been a hot mass since his return from the disabled list. He's posted a line of .333/.538/.778 in four games. But this isn't anything new - he's really just picking up where he left off. He OPS'd a very respectable .856 in the two weeks before straining his oblique.

It may be time to wrap it up for Miguel Cairo, but don't forget to remove his brains through his nose

Mental note: think of a better mummy reference intro to this segment before publication

Miguel Cairo has been a revelation for the Reds' bench the past two seasons, swinging a league-average bat while playing five different positions. But at 38, that old adage about Cleopatra and The Nile may be more appropriate than the Reds are willing to admit. He has only collected 7 hits so far this season.