Red Reposter - SCOTUS rules to uphold mandate that Joey Votto be named President of the US by axios

"I pledge allegiance to Joey Votto, the greatest hitter in America." Mandatory Credit: Frank Victores-US PRESSWIRE

Dusty Baker was eager to hit the road after yesterday's loss
"You have to dedicate yourself on the West Coast," he said. "There are a lot distractions. There are a lot of things to do away from the ballpark — day and night. Invariably a lot of families go. One thing I stress: This is a business trip, not a vacation." At that, Zack Cozart sat up with a forlorn look. He breathed a heavy sigh and unpacked a Goofy hat from his bag and put in the top of his locker.

The Reds have announced that Joe Morgan will be the subject of the next statue to be erected on Crosley Terrace
By my count, he will be the sixth Red to be honored thusly. The preliminary conceptions have Morgan breaking from first base in an attempted steal. He did a lot of that back in the day, and he was pretty darned good at it. No word yet on just how little this statue of Little Joe will be.

Jeff Sullivan over at The Mothership has an intelligent and nuanced take on Aroll-gate
He says taken in a vacuum, the somersaults were strange but certainly not offensive. The problem was absolutely everything Chapman has done in his entire life leading up to that moment:

"In isolation, I didn't really mind Chapman's somersaults. They were weird, because adult athletes don't do slow somersaults on purpose, but I've seen enough Francisco Rodriguez and Jose Valverde in my day to have built up a tolerance of or even appreciation for these things. Chapman had been going through a rough stretch, and then he recorded a save, and he acted out of glee. Acceptable! The problem is where Chapman set the expectations."

Dave Cameron at FanGraphs reveals his stat nerd National League All-Stars
The Reds rep hard, with Joey Votto the obvious choice among an otherwise weak crop of 1Bs. Brandon Phillips is his starter at 2B, with Johnny Cueto and Aroldis Chapman on the pitching staff. Jay Bruce earns an apology for just missing the cut in the OF.

The Reds signed supplemental first-round pick Jeff Gelalich
The outfielder led his UCLA Bruins to the College World Series this year and signed for just under the recommended slot. The Reds have now signed every one of their draft picks from the first 10 rounds with a bit of scratch left over from their bonus pool of around $6.5 mil. Good draft.

Loyal reader OGC Reds brings our attention to this video of Pensacola Blue Wahoos' SS Didi Gregorius
Pretty nice leather out there, Didi.

The Hattiesburg American has a really nice piece on hometown kid Billy Hamilton
Well, Hamilton went to high school in Taylorsville, which is about an hour north of Hattiesburg for all you geonerds out there. Here's a great quote from Ken Griffey Sr:

"I have played with or against guys like Ricky Henderson, Joe Morgan, Vince Coleman, Tim Raines, Andre Dawson, Lou Brock and saw Maury Wills, and I think Billy is in their class as far as his speed and quickness," Griffey said. "Billy’s greatest attribute is his combination of speed and quickness, and some of those guys did not have both those attributes."

OMGreds feels compelled to remind you
that Todd Frazier is cool as hell.

The Reds slipped to #13 in the SI.com power rankings
So that is either troubling news, irritating news, or completely irrelevant news.

NotGraphs has a hilariously strange collage of video evidence
suggesting that former Red Edwin Encarnacion is, in some genetic part, a tyrannosaurus rex. Even more strange is that this genetic mutation only manifests itself when he hits a home run.

Red Reposter NEWS FROM HELL
In case you needed any further evidence that our great American civilization is waning, the once-revered science journal National Geographic conducted a survey asking Americans which presidential candidate would be better suited to lead the nation in case of an alien invasion. Governor Romney was the clear loser in the vote, but in reality the institutions of representative democracy and the academy are the biggest losers here.

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