Goodyear, AZ - Our Goodyear staff is reporting this Sunday morning that Reds Right Fielder Jay Bruce will miss the first two weeks of the season with an ingrown eyelash. The condition, known as Trichiasis among doctors, is painful and can lead to swelling, irritation, redness, and blurred vision of the eyes. While doctors anticipate a full recovery, it is likely Bruce may miss the first two weeks of the season due to the lingering effects of the forthcoming removal procedure.
Bruce will fly back to Cincinnati today and will visit the team's ophthalmologist to remove the hair follicle on Monday. Until this procedure is performed, the Reds will have its medical staff apply cold compresses to the infected area every twenty minutes while keeping Bruce under close surveillance . If all goes well, Bruce may begin batting practice by in ten days.
Since no formal announcement has been made, the Reds front office has refused to comment on the situation. When asked about it, Manager Dustin Baker was quoted as saying, "this is news to me, I have him penciled in for my lineup." When asked for further clarification from our Goodyear reporters, Red Reporter Moderator "Uncle Weez" responded, "Dude, we left Arizona last week. None of this is true. You need to stop falling for prank e-mails. Have you even had an ingrown eyelash before? It’s not that serious."