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Around SBN: NFL Players Ready To Welcome Gay Teammate

Game 152, Thread 2: Yonder Alonso was last seen heading to the basement with Dusty and a cask of Amontillado



Edinson Volquez is sharp as balls tonight.  Jim Edmonds hurt himself on a home run trot.  Chris Dickerson's defense has been suspect.  And Yonder Alonso can't get playing time for love nor money.  Reds lead, 4-0 in the top of the 4th.

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Eins

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Trivia answer...

Staub, Morneau, Votto, Stairs, Bay…?

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Walker is one

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

that makes 6 then.

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

oh shit, nevermind

Rusty Staub is New Orleanian…cajun French, not Canadian French.

Fuckin’ Welsh. Dern.

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

I don't know what the question is. But Stubby Clapp is canadian!

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

So... not Stubby Clapp?

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

unfortunately no.

He, Freel, Eckstein, Denorfia, AAAAAron Miles, Jeff Treadway, Craig Counsell, and Randy Ready have a hell of a softball team in Dallas though.

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Somewhere, Yonder and Janish are playing catch.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:08 PM EDT reply actions  

with END

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Heck, Valaika may join them soon.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

yep, in Florida

after we trade them for Hanley.

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

El Nino Destructor

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

Which is to say, Francisco.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

Juan "the iron glove" francisco

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

Who?

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Good lord

Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."

by ChiDa on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

i thought the title was gonna say ..

… last seen heading to the basement after having his stapler taken away by Lumbaker

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:09 PM EDT reply actions  

it woulda felt good to be a gangster

instead, you’re just an idiot.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

it's ok .. i should have capitalized the B in baker

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Lumbergh

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

dammit

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

have you seen my stapler?

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

If I say yes

will that keep you from putting strychnine in the guacamole?

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

Solid.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:10 PM EDT reply actions  

Edinson looks hawt, hawt, hawt

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:11 PM EDT reply actions  

kinky

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, he is looking way better than I'd have expected

I wasn’t anticipating getting any help at all from him this year. Great to see some ace-level stuff.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Game 152 tonight

season has flown by. anyone going to another home game this season?

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:12 PM EDT reply actions  

yes, playoffs!

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

LUCKY!

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

nah, I have school

I was able to travel to Ohio this year to see the series against the Royals, well, at least I got to go there. HBU?

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, I was thinking about this earlier today

We’re almost done with the season. I was kind of looking forward to having my evenings open up again, but it still snuck up on me.

And YES! I’ll be going to a home game! Game 162 against these here Brewers to thank the boys for a dream season.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

nice!

i got ducats for game 161 early, early on for me, ash, bk and than.

good luck on fan appreciation day. hope you get a Wire to Wire book!!!

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

I already have one :(

Personalized and signed by the authors!

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

need to get the 2010 Reds roster to sign it also!

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

not a bad idea

the Reds faithful bought that book long before the team got to first place this season.

everyone with a first edition gets its signed at Green Diamond!

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

uhhh...

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

Eyewitness report, and whatnot

link

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 9:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

mini RR get together

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yes!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

LOL, 2nd DP tonight...

12 up, 12 down, and he just LOWERED his pitches per batter below 3!

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 9:13 PM EDT reply actions  

Rather studly.

He’s deserving of some arguably homosexual man love right now.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

Can we rest BP already???

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:14 PM EDT reply actions  

Apparently

Votto’s absence does not make Dusty’s heart grow Yonder, but I need to say Cairo has done great again. He already has an RBI

by Red_Poodle on Sep 21, 2010 9:15 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

well played

after we seal it up this weekend, we should expect to see the scrubs quite a bit next week.

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yonder wouldve hit a homer

Cairo has been great for us this year, he helped us win like 10 games which is great for a bench player. Is there a stat for production off the bench or fill in roles that increase win pct.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ok thanks

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

per Frangraphs

Cairo’s WPA/LI is 0.91, where 0 is average

For the record Votto leads the league with 6.11

by Grahamophone on Sep 21, 2010 9:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

Oh

I was going to look it up. Thanks. Cairo, again, has been great. And Votto of course would lead a statistic like that.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

with Edinson's performance

one could send out the Louisville Bats lineup tonight

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fuck biology?

Because I have a Biology test to study for tomorrow.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

that's five syllables

unless you have a funky accent

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:22 PM EDT up reply actions  

Bi-o-lo-gy

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

Shit.

I forgot that fuck is only one syllable.

I must reconsider.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

The fact that you forgot...

would mean you had previously thought upon this, and would therefore be able to remember. That’s downright humorous.

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fuckin biology

how does it work?

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:24 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

Nicely done.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

I had a Biology Test today

my teacher said that if we got a 75 it was great.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sophomore Biology

We were just doing the first 2 chapters on molecules and bonds and a bunch of that fun stuff.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

Group test, eh?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sorry...

I meant if any one of us got a 75. Single test.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm just joshin' with ya!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:26 PM EDT up reply actions  

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

OMG

I remember that weirdo. She followed me around for two weeks. It was worse than Elmo whacking me in the head or Dora leading me the wrong way when the right path was clearly to the right.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

She? Are you sure?

Some of these Japanese shows are kind of weird.

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yea

She kept hiding behind rocks and throwing eggs at me.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

Then you'll love this

^da da dada dat tad dat^

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 9:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

The hell is Brantley talking about?

Like Edmund Fitzgerald is a recording artist?

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:18 PM EDT reply actions  

Yes indeed!

I’ve been pleased to find various Great Lakes Brewery beers on tap at an increasing number of DC bars.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

I haven't been paying attention...

did Edmonds seriously injure himself on a HR trot?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:20 PM EDT reply actions  

strained right lower leg

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

he hurt it on the swing

watch the replay

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

Just listening on radio

And started listening after he got hurt. You may be (but probably aren’t) surprised at how much I fake in the game recaps.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

...

:-(

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

goo

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

tragic

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 9:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

in that case

very impressive

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

Unclear how serious the injury is.

Or did you mean were they serious in describing the cause of his injury as the trot?

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

Oh, it was an ambiguously constructed question.

Actually I intended neither of those, but instead to convey incredulity at the situation.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's astounding the way they play against crappy teams

And yeah, we’ve scuffled a lot in September, but the Cards have absolutely imploded. So, so great.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

And they're still pretty good in big games.

They’ve killed us head-to-head this year but haven’t taken care of the bad teams.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

Really extreme playing to the level of their competition

A winning record against winning teams and a losing record against losing teams. And when you play most of your game against the losers of the NL Central, that’s a problem.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

The Bengals have this problem but it's not as severe.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

"velocitized"

Drink!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:25 PM EDT reply actions  

7 pitches? For one guy?

So much for making the postseason roster!

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 9:26 PM EDT reply actions  

they don't even have a picture for Heisey

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

3 pitch strikeout...

The Brewers might not be letting him take that picture.

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 9:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

Unless someone like him cares a whole awful lot

Nothing is going to get better. It’s not.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

Which is why I hate him!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

Edinson looks like the Game One starter in the postseason

then Bronson, followed by Cueto.

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:28 PM EDT reply actions  

Bronson will start Game 1

Dusty will bow to the veteran and his veterany-ness and playoff experience.

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 9:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

i dunno

edinson was an AS under dusty…

"Yahan Sentona's strikeouts are way down this year" Jake Liscow

by obc2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

I think Arroyo is still the Game One starter.

Dusty is Dusty. If Coco is still the closer, Arroyo will stay as the Game One starter.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

I don't think this is necessarily bad.

It’s like in go tournaments, when you drop your best player into the 2nd or 3rd seat to guarantee that win, especially if you know beating the other team’s top player is going to be especially hard.

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

Go tournaments=golf tournaments?

If so, that makes sense.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

Go, the Japanese board game.

It looks like Othello, but much harder. Black and white stones, big board, etc.

But yes, any such tournament where teams of individuals play head-to-head but team totals matter in the end.

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

wow.

You may be the biggest nerd here. I mean that as a compliment.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

On RR the biggest nerd gets all the girls.

The imaginary RR girls, that is.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

Hey, there are real RR girls!

They’re just smart enough not to want RR guys.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

hand in hand

oh yeah

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:41 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Rec for DJ Quik.

But this song is the best. Also, how we feel about Cardinal fans.

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

:(

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thanks.

I mean that as gratitude.

by ashersky on Sep 21, 2010 9:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

is it anything like 4chan?

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

There is one thing I miss about Eric Milton not being around anymore?

Every fifth day was filled with Office Space-hilarity.

Definitely not worth the shitty pitching, however. …That’s all, just thinking and typing.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 9:29 PM EDT reply actions  

There's a lot wrong with me, but I'm not that crazy.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 9:32 PM EDT up reply actions  

Like wearing an OSU shirt in Champaign.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

I am that crazy.

I was also wearing my Reds hat. I got more dirty looks that usual.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

You are awesome.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Have fun. It's a blast.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

wins are overrated!

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

True. Lets go with something that actually matters

Like $25.5M over three years for -1.3 WAR. Thats not a dash, thats a negative sign. $25,500,000 for a guy with an ERA+ of 77

by C.DeVore on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

Gosh, Eric Milton was awful.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

miller lite sux

it’s all about the high life

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT reply actions  

Jim Day, you're a weirdo.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT reply actions  

This awesome game by Volquez was predictable

since I decided to play Cueto instead of Volquez this week.

by Brian B on Sep 21, 2010 9:30 PM EDT via mobile reply actions  

I'll text "3"

tastes like piss

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 9:31 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

An "in honor of Miller Park" text poll should really have included Corky Miller somehow

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 9:32 PM EDT reply actions  

:-{

Corky!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 9:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

I love that.

It’s perfect!

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.

by DocRam on Sep 21, 2010 9:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

I can't take credit, that was all him.

He finishes his tweets with it.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

Oh, I know...

I laughed my ass off the first time I saw him do use it!

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.

by DocRam on Sep 21, 2010 10:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

Corky Miller

1. Great Mustache?

2. Best Mustache?

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Oh Ramon Limon!

I think I know exactly what kind of man you are.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:35 PM EDT reply actions  

Voltron grand slam?

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:36 PM EDT reply actions  

bring in teh big guns to face the....

wait, the 9th hole pitcher spot?

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Our magic number is gay?

Not that there is anything wrong with that

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

Or Al Oliver

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:39 PM EDT up reply actions  

Man, I like Al Oliver!

He’s a real decent fellow.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

Or Curtis Goodwin

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 9:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

He could really grab a handful of balls, eh?

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:42 PM EDT up reply actions  

In more ways than one

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 9:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ah ah ah!

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

I hate Adam Rosales, quit bringing him back!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

Yep, that's a rec.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

Coffey time!

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:37 PM EDT reply actions  

Bases slammed

with Volquez and BP due up. O well…

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:39 PM EDT reply actions  

Bases loaded for Volquez?

Awwwww yeah.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:40 PM EDT reply actions  

Coffey time!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:40 PM EDT reply actions  

His name is Robert Paulson

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 9:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

In Milwaukee....

put one on the slide again!

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.

by DocRam on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

there you go ... replay!

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

Vindication

I has it

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

That simply has to have been planned.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

saw on the other thread

people wondering why is there no hate on heisey….my response is if stubbs get slack he should too….

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:44 PM EDT reply actions  

He's gritty

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

stubbs?

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Heisey

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Steisey!

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Like unwashed lettuce.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

You just read the entire other thread?

I respect that.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

/Mariners'd

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

TLR'd

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Mmm, two pitchers

Reminds me of watching football at the bar.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Hit Brandon eighth?

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

shit BP

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT reply actions  

BP Fail

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Good grief.

Nice pitch, Todd Coffey.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:45 PM EDT reply actions  

You know you're kicking ass when you can strike out with 2 outs and the bases loaded and just smile about it.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:46 PM EDT reply actions  

You know who sucked? Phil Norton.

Yep.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:47 PM EDT reply actions  

It's all about Eugene AVG

This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the kipper-snacks.

by andromache on Sep 21, 2010 9:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Alex Avast! isn't bad, either.

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.

by DocRam on Sep 21, 2010 9:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

how did edmonds hurt himself?

the swing or the trot?

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Damn French

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fucking tendons, how do they work?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

So that makes Edmonds Brad Pitt?

Makes sense

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 9:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

This has been bugging me for awhile

Cardinals fans refer to Pujols, Rolen, and Edmonds as “MV3” for their 2006 seasons. Which is just an awful nickname. So I would like to suggest to them that this year they have Carpenter, Rasmus, and Molina – “The Human Caterpillar.” And the Pujols is implied.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

Goddammit, don't bring that shit up

Now I know what my nightmare is going to involve tonight. Fuck

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

I thought it was Human Centipede ... or am I missing something?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fuck you SBN.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fuck, you are right

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Dammit

Yes, of course you’re right. I am a dumb.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 10:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

I thought it was Human Centipede ... or am I missing something?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Good point.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

on the swing you could see him grimace

but it didn’t show up till he rounded third.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 9:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

They're saying swing.

What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.

by DocRam on Sep 21, 2010 9:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fashion plate that MArty is, he should know

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

Here's a color rendidtion:

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

TRADE HIM

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:50 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

can we get hamilton back?

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

how long is he out?

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

Unsure

Possibly for the rest of the season.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 9:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

for real?

i wanted to see a ranger vs reds ws!

"God has blessed me and I will continue to do my best for him. This is more important than anything I could do in baseball." -Albert Pujols

by shortstopv2 on Sep 21, 2010 9:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

you just might

The Rangers seem to be doing just fine without Hamilton.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

No one who trades Hamilton wins the trade.

Unless you get Prince Albert even up and the Cards pay his salary.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 9:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

TRIPLE PLAY!

jk

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:54 PM EDT reply actions  

Two out of three aint bad

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

True

Im aight with it

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

Aroldis Chapman is pointing and laughing at that 96 mph fastball.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:54 PM EDT reply actions  

beer drinkers

offering 2 for 1

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 9:55 PM EDT reply actions  

and hell raisers

offering lottery tickets for an ass beating

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

I just stopped in for a second to see FIVE

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 9:56 PM EDT reply actions  

You know, Wisconsin is famous for beer and cheese.

So most people love Wisconsin. I hate beer, though.

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 9:56 PM EDT reply actions  

I like to eat a brick of cheese and a box of prunes

And let them battle it out in my colon

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 9:57 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

But aren't you, like, twelve?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 9:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

But you like sex on a bed of greens

how does this make you feel?

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

and sausage

Don’t forget the sausage.

A friend of mine from Milwaukee always brings cheese and sausage when she comes to visit. One year she brought a sausage shaped like a football and cheese shaped like Brett Favre.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Alternate response:

And a box of prunes with a picture of Osi Umenyora.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 10:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cmon!

My stupid study shits are taking forever to print.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Aha!

Clever but I actually have gameday on my computer while im sitting by my printer. Well Played mister.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

Way to go Voltron!

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 9:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Oh, is there a game afoot?

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 9:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

67 pitches, 46 strikes

Who are you? And what have you done with the REAL Edinson Volquez?

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

what happened to twitter?

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Formatting issues

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

There was a bug

that allowed people to include javascript code in tweets, which would then propagate itself through other people’s tweets if they used twitter.com.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

It got twitterpated

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:01 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Yeah, they finally fixed the vulnerability.

It kind of took them a while though.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

what happened to it

did it get hacked again?

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

they called him

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

OCAB

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 10:00 PM EDT reply actions  

Celebrating the groundout?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sorry

I cant watch the game, so I saw on gameday that he was up so I was early celebrating that he would bomb one, but he didnt.

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

let's win today

so i don’t have to see bench’s gd uni on the front of red reporter.

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:01 PM EDT reply actions  

Not a Bench fan?

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

You'd rather see BP's?

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

yes

he’s current and not as, incredibly, self important

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

i think bench is much more smug.

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

to be fair, Bench has more reason to be smug.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Mike Schmidt has more reason than bizzench

and he isn’t smug

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

don't get me wrong, I'm not his biggest fan either

I was just saying, of the two…

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Actually I've already found the picture for No. 4

And it ain’t BP….

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 10:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Put this celebration up

dancin’’

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cmon REDS!

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 10:06 PM EDT reply actions  

Wow, nice curveball.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:07 PM EDT reply actions  

HAYSOOS!

Voltron will be unstoppable if he can command that curve ball consistently

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Volquez is still 1 runner past the minimum...

Too bad it was a run. Hmmm…that means that through 6, the Brewers have left nobody on base. Weird.

I suppose they won’t let him go 9. Oh well.

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 10:07 PM EDT reply actions  

If he can stay under 100, probably.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

Okay, that's not going to happen.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

The Phillies are on some kind of roll

Hopefully we can avoid them in the playoffs

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:11 PM EDT reply actions  

Maybe they will move to the American League?

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

Or their entire starting lineup will be stricken with the Bubonic Plague?

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 10:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

According to GameDay

C-Dick is back to his old ways… “Chris Dickerson left the game due to an injured leg”

by wishfuldrifter on Sep 21, 2010 10:12 PM EDT reply actions  

He really is hell bent on trying to convince us that we got the better of that deal, isn't he?

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

I reiterate:

Scott Rolen: Winner
Don Blasingame: Loser

Joey Votto: Winner
Chris Dickerson: Loser

etc.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

they told him

“Top that!” and he thought they meant Edmonds’ leg injury, not the home run.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:23 PM EDT up reply actions  

shit

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:14 PM EDT reply actions  

Smith and Bray are up already.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

Jesus tHom, get off the fucking ledge

Two minutes ago, you were ready to give Volquez the Cy Young.

And Welsh calls Volquez “the veteran” now.

by Brian B on Sep 21, 2010 10:16 PM EDT via mobile reply actions  

Classic tHommy

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

suddenly he is fapping over volquez

while still tasting the vomit he just had in his mouth over the same pitcher

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Classic tHommy

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

If he's only good for 6...

I can handle that. It was just amazing how he was mowing people down for the first 5, thanks in part to awesome defense.

by MatthewH on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Like father, like son

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

"it's gone completely awry!"

Well, I would tend to think you could say that after runs have after scored. Until then, it’s only moderately bad at worst.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

Mads, I love you.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thanks for blowing my cover

I’m trying to look like I’m paying attention in Corporations and this ruined my otherwise stoic and studious face. Rec’d, even though its already green

by C.DeVore on Sep 22, 2010 9:27 AM EDT up reply actions  

NICE!

"Before I write I let my mind go blind and let the Lord do His thing. " -Tupac Shakur

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it looks like work." -Thomas Edison

by sexsalad on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT reply actions  

Well, I'll take that...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT reply actions  

shoooweee

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT reply actions  

just in time

"Now onto more important things: Punching Errorlando Cabrerror in the fucking tits." -Geki

by GrooveLeg on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT reply actions  

Ahhh

Cmon Voltron, dont you hate when you get a haircut and your shirt itches

"Tilt your head, OGC. I do it alot :)"

by OGC Reds on Sep 21, 2010 10:17 PM EDT reply actions  

I just realized that we need many many many runs..

AS Coco may be called upon to close this game.
And despite his recent good showing I don’t trust him as far as I can throw Prince Fielder.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:22 PM EDT reply actions  

bananas

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:23 PM EDT reply actions  

no doubt

I could sleep when I lived alone.
Is there a ghost in my house?

by supergrover on Sep 21, 2010 10:25 PM EDT up reply actions  

FTH was that?

Who dresses up as a banana to go to a ballgame?

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

I took it, but I think it was on his camera.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

it's milwaukee .... what the hell else are you gonna do?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

So...the Braves seem to have just opened up NLDS ticket sales on their website.

Do they refund convenience fees if those guys don’t make it?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:25 PM EDT reply actions  

I guess I figure that if they make it, they'd be the wild card, right?

So they wouldn’t have home field advantage and their first home game would be Sunday.

Then again, there’s a good chance they would be playing the Giants anyway…

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

Wagon back out for the 8th

Huh

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:26 PM EDT reply actions  

IT'S GONE COMPLETELY AWRY!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

Voltron out there again

kinda surprised

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:27 PM EDT reply actions  

Still under 100 pitches

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

damn, still dealing

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

It is a save situation, after all.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

He does cause my sphincter to close up

Every time he pitches

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:30 PM EDT up reply actions  

So the Astros are eliminated

Only one left

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:31 PM EDT reply actions  

There can only be one

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

Rec'd hard. There can only be none!

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

You just mixed ATHF and Sealab, douche.

FAIL FAIL FAIL

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

To clarify, it's in both, "There can be only none" is from Sealab

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, you gotta turn in your nerd card

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

I carry it proudly.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

Farney loses his nerd card, not you

Just to clarify

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ha, I see.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

I suck at replying today

Constantly hitting the wrong message

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

Nah, I probably have the biggest comic book collection here.

/Nerd brag’d

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

I know I did. I was looking for a photo of Sealab and hit post. I FAILED HARD.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

I miss you, Sealab

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

Didn't that dude manage the Red Sox?

Grady Little, right?

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

As do I.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

But I do have my Squidbillies. God I love Squidbillies.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

tHom, Chris Speier was NOT an "outstanding" player

Career OPS+ of 88 = not outstanding

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:33 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm not saying he sucked

I remember him, he hung around a long time because he was a decent SS with a not-horrible bat, but “outstanding” is laying it on more than a little thick

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

Goddammit you guys

Let us win once in awhile.

It was a great selection of awesome.

by battlekow on Sep 21, 2010 10:34 PM EDT reply actions  

We have to eliminate the Cardinals! Important work to be done!

C’mon, you understand, right?

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

that's right, you tell em Ash

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

i like cardinal glick better

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, and if they looked like that, I'd still be Catholic

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm afraid the guys abusing altar boys

Wouldn’t be swayed by a couple of titties

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

They sure do

I just watched “Bitch Slap” last night. Lucy Lawless and the chick who played her Xena sidekick were nuns in that.

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

/booooiiiiiiiooooooiiiiinnnnnggg!

Over the other chick not Lucy Lawless.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yes, but is is there nip?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

So you're saying there IS nip just not from those three ... interesting.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

There he is!

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

No.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

Also, I think a better Poe reference in this case (from my perspective) is...

“The Masque of the Red Death”

It was a great selection of awesome.

by battlekow on Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sorry, dude

Thanks for winning a couple against St Louis. We owe you one.

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:36 PM EDT reply actions  

Reply fail

I am an idjiot

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

idjiot? is that sweedish?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:37 PM EDT up reply actions  

one too many "e"s

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

I used to live in Madison...I never hear that spoken.

Well it is prolly Coco time – should I stay or should I go?

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:39 PM EDT reply actions  

Stay

If you go there might be trouble

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

But if you stay it could be double

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

minor nit

if you stay they could hit a double

by occams_tiger_teeth on Sep 21, 2010 10:41 PM EDT up reply actions  

were you here for the 9th last night?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

Give him a break, he was tired

He had to break out of the box Dusty had him locked in

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:42 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

his 2nd tonight according to thom

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:43 PM EDT up reply actions  

two in a single game!

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM EDT up reply actions  

what happened on the triple?

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:44 PM EDT reply actions  

lined hard down into the right field corner

weeks, may have had a play at third, but he didn’t handle the cutoff.

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 10:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

bp rounded first, headed to second, then slid into third

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

that might be the best recap of a play in the history of RR

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

I love you, Mads.

Seriously. Adopt me. You can be my crazy dad.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'd rather him be my crazy uncle. Uncles let you get away with more.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

8 pretty good innings by our 3rd playoff starter

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT reply actions  

And here we go

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Nice of dustbrain to send up Yonder against the fireballing lefty.

Good for the kid’s confidence.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Hart grounds into a few dp

now would be good

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:50 PM EDT reply actions  

anybody up in the pen?

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM EDT reply actions  

Tying run in the hole.

Hmmmm sounds dangerous…

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 10:51 PM EDT reply actions  

Way to bail Cordero out there, Hart.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:52 PM EDT reply actions  

hmmm...

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

what about Ryan Howard?

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

BOOM! Rec'd

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's important for the Brewers to always have an outfielder who looks like the Packers quarterback

Geoff Jenkins was Favre’s security double, but Braun is kind of effing things up by being almost as famous as Aaron Rodgers.

It was a great selection of awesome.

by battlekow on Sep 21, 2010 10:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

What a douche.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

not good CoCo

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:52 PM EDT reply actions  

no Bohica, no Bohica

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT reply actions  

CoCome on

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Okay, I need the Braves to win a few so they can be the wild card

and for the Reds to finish with a better record than the NL West champs…

so that I would then have tickets for one, maybe two, Braves-Reds playoff games.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT reply actions  

what was the on-field delay?

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:53 PM EDT reply actions  

Dusty arguing the HBP

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

did he have reason to argue?

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yes

Really close

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

Not as much as Prince Fielder

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

Great pitch by Coco

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:54 PM EDT reply actions  

FAIL FAIL FAIL FAIL

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fucking shit

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

Wow that was horrible

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

OMG

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

Holy shit guys

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

WTF

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

Fuck me Jay

There goes the fucking gold glove

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm lagged

but I know something bad is coming…

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:55 PM EDT reply actions  

Okay, that was worse than I expected.

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

sorry

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

quick. turn it off.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yikes, Jay.

That was real bad.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT reply actions  

Well poop.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT reply actions  

At least 2 errors on that play

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT reply actions  

3 errors in one play?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT reply actions  

Holy shit

They’re going to give Bruce 2 errors on that? Why not one on Cordero?

by Brian B on Sep 21, 2010 10:56 PM EDT via mobile reply actions  

I give him 20 errors

Because it was just that ugly

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

looks like one for Bruce

one for CoCo.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

wow.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Well what happened? GameDay's shit-tay.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Horrors, terrors,

Just a massive fuck up

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yup. That pretty much sums it up.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

don't worry about it

we won

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

Bruce kicked the s#!+ out of a ball to him

then threw it to no one in particular, allowing 2 to score.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thank you COCO

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

...and this one belongs to the Reds!!!

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

WOOOOOO

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Thank god

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

And its over!

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 10:57 PM EDT reply actions  

computer animations? 1960?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

A computer the size of an infield

"It's like my father used to say, "When I was a child, I thought as a child and spoke as a child. And when I became a man, I took that child out back and had him shot.' "

by RedConn on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Which reminds me, and maybe it's because I'm not 10 anymore...

The new COSI blows.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Didn't COSI always blow?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

No, it did not.

I loved it before it moved. Hate the new building.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

I always thought it sucked. But that's probably because we went to lame exhibits.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

Doesn't Scrabbles's wife work there?

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

My grandpa founded the original COSI

good story, I know.

We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad. Otherwise, you wouldn't have come.

by chesirecat on Sep 21, 2010 11:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

keep it real BP

by I75series on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

AH AH AH!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

Otro disastro de Cordero?

Ay caramba!

I'm sure you all know me.

by Joe Public on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT reply actions  

No idea what you said.

But I’ll agree anyway.

I'm sure you all know me.

by Joe Public on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Gameday has been hung up on

“in play, run(s)” for a long time, so I guess they’re trying to decide who gets what error where?

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 10:58 PM EDT reply actions  

Four (from 1939 to 1941)

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT reply actions   2 recs

take that Bench

Rob Dibble, Norm Charlton, and Randy Myers were nasty boys. Arthur Rhodes is a nasty MAN. by Brendanukkah

by Caleb on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Not just any catcher

That’s Ernie Fucking Lombardi!

"Read a fucking book." - Nucky Thompson

by cesarhernandez on Sep 21, 2010 11:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

I just mean

that there’s a similar picture of Bench upthread. Is this something catchers do for photographs?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

Two Jay Bruce errors.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

oops. never mind

one JB, one on Coco.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Shoulda been 3

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

Good Lord, gentlemen.

Phew.

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT reply actions  

FOUR! FANTASTIC!!

This is the Fantastic Four I was introduced to as a kid. With Herbie the Robot

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT reply actions  

hey, I loved that show!

"The USA despite its flaws and corruption and overall messiness is still a great and powerful instrument of freedom and hope for the entire world." - Madville

by bbjones on Sep 22, 2010 12:17 AM EDT up reply actions  

God in heaven Dusty

please reconsider Your Closer options before it’s too late

by featherman on Sep 21, 2010 10:59 PM EDT reply actions  

What's there to consider?

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT up reply actions  

yeah

I mean, there was Bruce’s error, but still.

They can’t really go into the post-season with Cordero was the closer…can they?

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 11:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sure.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Good Job Coco

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:00 PM EDT reply actions  

FOUR!

I wonder if there’s a college study that shows how exposing my generation to Three’s Company set gender relations back approximately 715 years

by RoastBeefKazenzakis on Sep 21, 2010 11:01 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

whooooooooooooooooooooo!

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

x

"Fuck it, we'll do it live."

by DTFH91 on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

Jim Day just called Cairo "Orlando Cabrera" to his face

"Aroldis Chapman is a seven course meal followed by four hours of sex on the table with a nymphomaniac model heiress who owns her own brewery." - jch24

by BK on Sep 21, 2010 11:01 PM EDT reply actions  

That's racist!

And God bless DVR!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

i think he thought he was talking to ocab the whole time

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 11:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

all those Hispanic guys look alike?

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 11:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

That's why he keeps bodies in the basement. Bodies don't have names.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:03 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

I laughed hard at this one.

We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad. Otherwise, you wouldn't have come.

by chesirecat on Sep 21, 2010 11:20 PM EDT up reply actions  

Coc is the closer and I think it is going to be close between the Yanks and the Reds...

Originally I predicted a Reds-Yankees WS with the Yanks winning…but I beginning to change my point of view.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

Just imagine this is a playoff game

we got an excellent pitching from our starter and we’re up in the ninth. This whole fucking season in the hands of Cordero.

by featherman on Sep 21, 2010 11:04 PM EDT reply actions  

and yet, we won.

I’m not worried about that.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

One more poor pitch and we were tied

Its as if Coco has a good game and thinks he can go right back out there and let up a couple runs

C I N C I N N A T I R E D S

by I75series on Sep 21, 2010 11:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

but in the playoffs

we aren’t going to be playing the Brewers.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Sep 21, 2010 11:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

and hopefully in the playoffs, Jay Bruce won't think he's in the World Cup.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

marty was right

wtf is welch wearing?

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Is that a striped shirt and a patterned bowtie?

Good lord.

"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK

by ZJiff30 on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

Quite the sophisticated gentleman.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

BOWTIE TUESDAY!

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:05 PM EDT up reply actions  

In Cincinnati!

Let me write out a formal proof for you.

by Gray on Sep 21, 2010 11:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

gross

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

Gross?

If you won’t get a bow tie tattoo…then maybe you’ll consider a bow tie when you next go Trick or Treatin’ ?

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

the trumpet isn't pictured

I'm not addicted to cocaine, I just like the smell of it - Richard Pryor

by Howie Feltersnatch on Sep 21, 2010 11:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sorry

Here ya go…

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

On the inside?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ok here are the fucking horns...

I THOUGHT THIS WAS ABOUT BOW TIES…

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

i love bowties and the whole bowtie tuesday idea ...

but good lord that’s awful

i have a witty signature thought up, i just haven't posted it yet.

by joshuar9476 on Sep 21, 2010 11:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

yup, it really is

"Superman plays first base for the Reds." - tHom Brennaman

by Ash on Sep 21, 2010 11:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

In honor of tonights win...its anothe FAoftheG!!! Ashley Force, with her best Bristol Palin look!

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:08 PM EDT reply actions  

"her best Bristol Palin look!"

So dumb?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Now Farns...this blog is a-political...even right wing fascist NASCAR loving, queer bashers should get a picture of thier kind of "hottie" now and again.

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

You feel me, girl?

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 11:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

Their kind of "hottie" is a pregnant teen? Shit isn't that everyone's "hottie"?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

So the Clippers won the AAA title tonight, does this mean Cleveland's good soon?

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:13 PM EDT reply actions  

Just got in

I see it was another ho-hum save for Coco Puff.

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 11:17 PM EDT reply actions  

highway to the danger zone

errors did not help

C I N C I N N A T I R E D S

by I75series on Sep 21, 2010 11:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

Ah well, wins are what count

Without deviation from the norm, progress is not possible.

by Unmitigated Audacity on Sep 21, 2010 11:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

Well gang, glad I stayed but it is bed time for Madville..

Say that has a ring to it…could be a new late night comedy series…

Bedtime For Madville!
Starring Madville Del Rio as the lovable old drunk boozer
With BK as his side kick and Ash as the hand wringing GF…has a ring…no?

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:21 PM EDT reply actions  

I'd watch. It's got to be better than anything on CBS.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:28 PM EDT up reply actions  

Very true.

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans

by Farneyismycopilot on Sep 21, 2010 11:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

Just a quick note...

There was never any Amontillado. Montresor just promised Fortunato some, and Fortunato couldn’t resist. Fortunato had an ego, and thought he knew everything, but said stupid stuff all the time. Next thing he knew, Montresor was burying him behind a wall.

However, if Dusty is chained up inside a wall after burying Alonso 4th on the depth chart, then I don’t really care about faithfulness to source material.

Also I just got back from a Gaslight Anthem show and I might be a little tipsy.

Phone's ringing, Dude.

by rjdio on Sep 21, 2010 11:46 PM EDT reply actions  

I was really disappointed by the Gaslight Anthem when I saw them live

I’m a fan of their albums, but they seemed like real douches onstage. Your thoughts?

by Brendanukkah on Sep 21, 2010 11:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

The singer did all the talking, and didn't say much.

They were gracious and seemed genuinely surprised that so many people turned up. The place wasn’t sold out, but a nice crowd all the same. I didn’t pick up any douchey vibes from them, and I’m usually good at that. I’ve seen Ryan Adams.

We had to cut out because we have jobs, so we skipped the encore. The set was a little uneven, but they played everything I wanted to hear and a few I didn’t really know.

My only real complaint is that he used what sounded like a Fisher Price microphone (it probably wasn’t, but still) for a couple of songs, and it sounded like total shit. Then he put it away and went back to a real mic. For a Tuesday night show, it was pretty solid.

Phone's ringing, Dude.

by rjdio on Sep 21, 2010 11:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm telling you Yonder has pissed Dusty off...some he said or did or didn't do...

Why else would he PH Yonder against that specific Lefty…show the rookie up..now after that K you go sit on the bench and think about..

hey I’m supposed to be in bed…

If a guy hits .300 every year, what does he have to look forward to? I always tried to stay around .190, with three or four RBI. And I tried to get them all in September. That way I always had something to talk about during the winter.
Bob Uecker

by Madville on Sep 21, 2010 11:51 PM EDT reply actions  

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