Red Reposter - Let's Hope it's Possible to Be a Leader While Sitting on the Bench
It has been a very long time since the Reds were in 1st place in August. I figured you would all appreciate this. Breathe it in.
-
The big news of the night last night was Orlando Cabrera's injury
"It doesn’t look good," manager Dusty Baker said. "It’s a side. Those are bad. It’s his left side, which is his lead side. That makes it worse." Cabrera will almost certainly go on the DL, as he's in Cincinnati this morning to be checked out. It seems like Paul Janish will take over at SS in his stead, with one of the Reds young infielders in AAA stepping in to the reserve role.
Drew Sutton has been up for a cuppa already this season, and has played SS in a pinch, but his bat is cold and he really shouldn't be playing SS. Chris Valaika was a SS until last season, but he's been playing 2B in L'ville. Zack Cozart is the starting SS in L'ville and is likely the best overall option out of the bunch, but the Reds may not want to bring him up to sit the bench behind Janish and he is not on the 40-man. I think the Reds may wait until getting word on Cabrera, because if it's not major and he's only out for a few weeks I would think they go with Valaika. If Lando's gonna be out well into September or later though they may want to bring up the hot prospect Cozart and have him start.
I think the most distressing thing is that this oblique strain is the exact same injury that has sequestered Mike Lincoln in the bowels of oblivion for such a long time. Lincoln certainly isn't as important to the team as Lando is (and some will argue Lando isn't much important either) but now is not the time to lose anyone to injury. -
Chris Heisey has started the past 2 days in CF
and it looks like he might get an even longer look-see than that. "He’s been playing," Baker Baker said. "That’s two days in a row. He can run them down — not quite like Stubbs, which is a big part of our defense. But we’re in a performance game. We’ve been spotting him against certain kind of pitchers that I thought he was most conducive to having success against. He’s learning." The way Stubbs has been playing it looks more and more like he might be sent to Louisville in favor of Dickerson. Did anyone else notice that Heisey has gotten only 89 ABs since being called up at the end of April?? -
Hold on to your butts
As you probably know, Joey Votto took the night off last night because of a sore wrist. "It's been bothering him for about three days now and if you don't take care of it, it's only going to get worse, especially after every time you check swing," Reds manager Dusty Baker said. "It's a sprain and hopefully right now he's day-to-day. ... The doctor looked at him yesterday said it's a sprain of the wrist. Sometimes, you know, that wrist is something that you take for granted until you sprain it. Your wrist and your fingers, you don't even think about it as far as a hitter's concerned. That's a very, very important part of their hitting. As a guy who's hurt both of them, I know they're important."
It sounds like the Reds are just being cautious with him, but that's kinda the same thing they said when Votto was out for a week with the neck and Rolen was out for 10 days with the hamstring. Hopefully this is just a few days at most, but the history with these things has me worried. Luckily, the Reds have the Pirates and Cubs for the next 5, but they head to St. Louis after that. Votto's gotta be ready for that.
The Fay speculates that Chris Dickerson could be brought up this week in place of Drew Stubbs
Dickerson's rehab assignment is up Thursday, so the Reds will have to make a move with him. Both players have options, so either one can be sent to AAA. Fay says he's surprised that Stubbs hasn't been demoted already, but I think that's a bit impetuous. I really like how much faith Walt and the brass have in their young players. That being said, I don't think I would be against Stubbs taking a month or so in AAA to straighten himself out. The bigger question is how Dusty would handle the outfield playing time.
Russ Springer grew up watching the Big Red Machine
so when teams came calling this season there were only two teams he really considered. The Reds weren't even close to the best offer, but he wanted to be a Red. Remember how one of the reasons the Reds signed Dusty Baker was because he could attract high-profile free agents? It's working! Give him an extension!
Grimey at Blog Red Machine compares Travis Wood to Stephen Strasburg
Strasburg has been the hype of the Milky Way since coming up in June, but Woody ain't too bad himself. Here's what Grimey says:
"Strasburg is 5-2 and has pitched 54 innings. His ERA stands at 2.32. And, he has struck out 75 hitters. He has 15 walks. His WHIP stands at a stellar 1.067. Those are some outstanding numbers for a rookie. And, he was probably on pace to be the rookie of the year until his shoulder ailment occurred. So, now let’s check out the Reds’ Travis Freakin Wood’s numbers so far this season. His record stands at 2-1 and he has pitched 45 innings. So, he has 9 fewer innings than Strasburg. Wood has 37 strikeouts which is 38 or so less than Strasburg. Travis isn’t a power or strikeout pitcher. Wood has walked 11 hitters and his WHIP so far this year is 0.880. Wow!!! That is a pitcher that is dominating. And, last but not least Travis Wood’s ERA is 2.42."
So while Strasburg is blowing 100mph fireballs by hitters, Wood is just getting outs. I certainly don't think (and I don't think Grimey does either) that Wood is as good a pitcher as Strasburg is, but it is pretty great to see another young Reds pitcher succeeding at the MLB level.
MLB Trade Rumors goes over the waiver trade candidates for August
Here's what they say about the Reds: "Reds closer Francisco Cordero will probably clear waivers, though he's unlikely to change teams. I view Bronson Arroyo as a similar case. The Reds could use the depth Aaron Harang will provide when he returns from the disabled list from back spasms, though the chance to shed the remainder of his contract would be appealing. Reliever Mike Lincoln is on the disabled list for an oblique strain; he'll clear waivers for sure."
Sporting News power rankings have the Reds at #10 this week
Behind only the Padres, Giants, and Braves in the NL. Apparently, Walt Jocketty is Gene Hackman: "After the Reds—who are fighting for their first playoff berth since 1995—stood pat on deadline day, it kinda felt like GM Walt Jocketty pulling out his Hoosiers speech … y'know, "I would hope you would support who we are, not who we are not. … This is your team.""
OMGReds has some glamour "Schotts" of the Marge Schott bobblehead
You can get the bobble head with the price of admission to the Reds HoF and Museum. I don't know why I was surprised they put her in a track suit.
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yeah, thanks for the star
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I've looked at this for like an hour.
I’m still confused.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
dead Orca (Killer Whale)
Orlando Cabrera to the DL…OrCa.
That’ll be 10 dollars.
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 2:18 PM EDT up reply actions
The last time the Reds were alone in first place during the month of August?
1995.
This is the latest in the season they’ve been in first place alone since 1999, when they were one game up on 9/28 with 4 to play. ugh.
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took me a few minutes too
best I can figure, in 1999, they weren’t ever in 1st place in August, however, they did spend some time in 1st in September.
Last time Reds were in 1st place in the month of August was in 1995, back when I was not yet a Reds fan because I was still bitter about the Reds sweeping the A’s (I moved to Cincinnati in 1990 as a young A’s fan).
"To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other." - Jack Handey
by JJ on Aug 3, 2010 2:45 PM EDT up reply actions
yep, they were never in first place alone in August in 1999
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Wait...
You mean people can change their team affiliation based on where they live?
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
well, I'm still an A's fan
I’ve just added the Reds as a co-#1 favorite team.
"To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other." - Jack Handey
by JJ on Aug 3, 2010 5:35 PM EDT up reply actions
I took $$$ from A's fans . . .
on the 90 series. It was like fishin in a barrel.
GO REDS !!
It's GO time !
Sorry for not being as close a follower of the Reds this year...
But outside of Votto, who has the best range at 1B for the Reds?
You're not forgiven!
just kidding. This is a problem, as there aren’t any real 1B on the team besides him.
Miguel Cairo seems to do OK there. Other than that, Ramon Hernandez was used there a lot last year, but he’s pretty bad.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
i heard Cairo can cover contra-bass all the way up to alto
He fixes the cable?
by Colin Auscapee on Aug 3, 2010 10:48 AM EDT up reply actions
Dustman says he be ok at mezzo-soprano in a pinch
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
But if it's a true soprano you want
you’re gonna need the High-C.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 12:24 PM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
Yay
I felt bad for Janish when the Reds signed Cabrera. They had gotten rid of Alex Gonzalez and Janish was the anointed SS. There were beat stories about how he felt responsible for the legacy of Reds SS, and how he worked really hard over the winter getting prepped for the job and all that ‘best shape of his life’ stuff…and then just before players reported to camp Cabrera got signed.
I sure hope Janish takes advantage of the deserved opportunity that I hope he gets. He’s certainly made the most of his 15 AB a month so far. We talk about Heisey getting only 89 AB since the end of April…Janish has 63 all year!
by DevilsAdvocate on Aug 3, 2010 11:39 AM EDT up reply actions
yeah and he then spent 200 AB's OPS'ing less than .650. The only legacy he continued
was me thinking Barry or Davey could still hit better than Janish. He’ll get one more chance this year to flash the leather and prove us wrong.
Personally, the more i think of Reds SS’s the more I eagerly anticipate the coming mediocrity of Zach. League average SS’s are hard to come by
The average NL SS OPS is .700
I’m pretty sure Cozart could manage that.
FTR, I think there’s at at least a decent chance Janish will too.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Must be a day ending in "y"
timb and creds are arguing about shortstops.
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and Brett Favre retiring!
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
by crolfer on Aug 3, 2010 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
and Slyde being snarky and condescending!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
well, how many times have you two engaged in the OCab/Janish/Cozart debate this year?
it’s more than 6 times, I know that much.
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This is the internet
I don’t have to prove anything!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Alabamafan'd
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:13 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm sorry, from now on he and I will limit our conversations to the following topics
1) Trains
2) UK basketball
3) Burger joints
4) the 1990 team
/snarkback’d
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
It's not so much that you have the conversation
it’s that you have the exact same conversation every time. What’s funny is that timb has agreed that Cabrera sucks and you have agreed that Cabrera isn’t really blocking anyone better, yet you end up going at it anyway. Just admit you like each other and go on a date, already, Ross & Rachel! (timely snark!)
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
I'd hate to move in on your territory
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I've already told timb no
it’d be nice for him if he had a “friend” to turn to.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
joanie and chachi
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Vito and Johnny Cakes!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:21 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
That doesn't sound disgusting.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
What if the pita bread was filled with grain weevils?
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
by crolfer on Aug 3, 2010 5:34 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Are they delicious?
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
I think the coolest thing is that Janish's "2-3 starts a week" we all thought was wise
will now happen all at once and NYC and Bubba can stop calling for more Janish when they remember what that means.
At least the infield defense is gonna be sharp throughout this month
I think it's sad that you are rooting for Janish to fail so that you can be right
I want to be wrong about Janish, just like I have been about Cairo (though I still think the other shoe will drop with that one)
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Hey Jonny is overrmatched by MLB pitching but he's done a fine job.
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
I'm not hoping he sucks
I know he can’t hit and I’m excited to see him play defense. He will perform to his career numbers and hopefully help solidify defense behind a pitching staff that really needs to step up
So? You in or out on the bet?
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
No promises.
just kidding, you’re going to love it!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Wouldn't you rather see him totally exceed all expectations though?
That’d kinda rock for us.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
and, i'd like that unicorn too
“exceeding expectations” is always nice. it’s why i am so happy with this baseball season
Do you consider Miguel Cairo's season to be a
unicorn, a dragon, or Bigfoot?
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 4:07 PM EDT up reply actions

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 4:08 PM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
I don't know why, but I laughed hard as hell
at this.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions
defintely not a unicorn
everyone knows they don’t exist.
As rare as Bigfoot and not as dangerous as a dragon….so I’ll stay with bigfoot
I've got your unicorn right here!

Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
by Slyde on Aug 3, 2010 4:07 PM EDT up reply actions 11 recs
so explain to me about historical
I know you are supposed to say “an historical item.” But that sounds dumb to me.
I don’t say “an hissing snake” or sleep in “an hotel” or “an house” or post pictures of “an heartthrob named Joey Votto.” So is there an historical reason “history” gets special treatment?
"The USA despite its flaws and corruption and overall messiness is still a great and powerful instrument of freedom and hope for the entire world." - Madville
so it IS "an heartthrob named Joey Votto"!
"The USA despite its flaws and corruption and overall messiness is still a great and powerful instrument of freedom and hope for the entire world." - Madville
For the love of god damned christ on a fucking hubcap, shut up all of you
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
Are you legitimately curious?
I was, so I looked it up. See if you can make sense of this. It kind of makes sense to me.
by the finest muffins on Aug 4, 2010 8:46 AM EDT up reply actions
yeah, I am!
and that’s a fascinating article.
see what I did there?
"The USA despite its flaws and corruption and overall messiness is still a great and powerful instrument of freedom and hope for the entire world." - Madville
I do see you did there!
You’re such an hysterically funny poster, bbjones.
by the finest muffins on Aug 5, 2010 12:49 AM EDT up reply actions
Phonetically, it starts with the consonant sound "y."
He’s wrong.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions
"Uh-ni-corn"
like underoos. You wouldn’t say a underoo, would you??
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
I've got your vowel right here!

Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
by Slyde on Aug 3, 2010 4:24 PM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
Anything involving Jonny Gomes punching something is rec worthy.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Agreed. 100 percent.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:26 PM EDT up reply actions
My "roommate" was "punching Elmo" one day in college
He didn’t lock the door and he let me videotape it.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
he did "show me his badge"
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
And this roommate was, who?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:29 PM EDT up reply actions
A pimp.

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 4:31 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I've got one, two, three, four, five bitches for you!
Ah ah ahhh!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
by Slyde on Aug 3, 2010 4:32 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
You were roommates with Jonny Gomes!?
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
English is not my first language
so suck my dick
by vottosmash! on Aug 3, 2010 4:14 PM EDT up reply actions 11 recs
what is? canadian?
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
by boobs on Aug 3, 2010 4:14 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Was your avatar green before the post went green?
The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!
Yes, it was.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:36 PM EDT up reply actions
That's too bad.
The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!
Comment of the year nominee
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Aug 3, 2010 6:12 PM EDT up reply actions
my college roomate used to say he was "punching the unicorn"
whent he door was locked….*
*not really, but it sounded plausible
it was, but timb was actually in the room too
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
A unicorn circle punch?
You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 4:18 PM EDT up reply actions 7 recs
Where the heck did he get a unicorn!?
I’ve been looking for one for ages!
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
There's happy and then there's THIS.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions
Beautiful work, Slyde
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
here's the thing I don't get
I first posted that pic back in March, and everyone is acting like it’s a new work. Recycling is great!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Nobody read the site in March
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Aug 3, 2010 6:12 PM EDT up reply actions
OK, enough discussion. Avatar bet.
Assuming Janish starts almost every day in August.
What will his August OPS be? I bet it’s higher than Lando’s on the season. (.641)
The bet is winner chooses the loser’s avatar for the month of September, during the Reds stretch run to glory.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Now this I can get behind!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Loser has to have that dead Orca as their avatar!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:25 PM EDT up reply actions
oh, you will....you will.
MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
by nycredsfan on Aug 3, 2010 3:29 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Dead Orca photo!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:29 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
your evil laugh made me happy
I’m more happy that Orlando got hurt, so we can stop having this interminable discussion.
What was janish’s OPS last season?
I already said, enough discussion
IT’S ON, BITCH!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Get One.
Christ on a Dead Whale
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
by Madville on Aug 3, 2010 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
crap, I hate UK basketball
well, basketball in general.
trains: there ain’t enough of them in Indiana
Burger Joints: Five guys on the recommendation of the folks here made me happy.
the 1990 team: awesome, although some hucksters try to cash out on my memories for their own prurient financial interest (kind of like Centerfold by Jay Giles)
Still, nyc, you do get used to his disdain. He’s just trying to socialize us (and it’s all your fault, since my comment was directed at another reader).
After awhile, since you and I and he agree on 90% of baseball topics, you can remind him of areas where we agree and it really upsets him. It is very hard for me to express the joy I feel at those moments
There are plenty of train(s) (tracks) in Indiana
Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."
And Gray being a doo-doo head!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
um, league "average" shortstops may be hard to come by
thanks to Hanley’s ass skewing things.
That said, league “median” shortstops are pretty easy to find…we’ve got one starting tonight, and another that’s going to the DL. They ARE middle of the road, and it looks like we’ve found a few.
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 2:06 PM EDT up reply actions
are you kidding?
half the SS’s in the league aren’t that good.
"The USA despite its flaws and corruption and overall messiness is still a great and powerful instrument of freedom and hope for the entire world." - Madville
by bbjones on Aug 4, 2010 1:08 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Looks like Brett Favre is going to retire instead of coming back
Good riddance
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I will believe it
1st week in September. Until then I’m skeptical.
If true though, how pissed you think the Vikings are? If they knew he wasn’t coming back they could of looked at McNabb, Campbell, Orton, etc.
yeah, as a casual Bears fan, this makes me very, very happy
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Josh Elliott quote
This is now the third time on these airwaves that I’ve announced his retirement.
"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK
New drinking game:
Drink every time Josh Elliott says the term “fait accompli”
I’m at 4 so far in the last 10 minutes.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Makes for an interesting morning.
"Don't turn off the TV if we've still got bats in our hands." - Dusty Baker
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 3, 2010 11:52 AM EDT up reply actions
I am a gigantic Vikings fan...
and this knocked the breath out of me this morning. I want to say this is “Bret being Bret” and trying to attract some attention before “saving the day”….but there is something that tells me he is serious. The Vikes are screwed without him…no question. Well, it was fun for a year. Time to double down on the Reds baby!!!
I'm sure it's different if he plays or played for your team, but since he has only ever played for teams I can't stand
I really despise the guy, and wish he would just shut up and go away for a long time.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
As a lifelong Vikings fan, my feelings for Favre are complex to say the least...
I HATED him right up until he was on my team and played so well. It always felt “dirty” to be rooting for him, I must admit. One Vikings fan summed it up…….“If he follows through and quits, I can go back hating him…and there is something right about that.” I concur….wholeheartedly. It would put the earth back on its axis for me. However, it doesn’t change the fact that the Vikings would be screwed and I’m happy to sacrifice my principles here (“Thou shall hate all things Bret”) for another Super Bowl run. If that makes me a whore…so be it. ;-)
Bronson Arroyo made Busted Coverage...Twice Yesterday
That takes talent. I’d go with the road beef if I was him
sounds painful
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
is this really necessary?
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:44 AM EDT up reply actions
I think it's link-worthy.
It’s not like any of these photos are candid – they’re all posing.
"Don't turn off the TV if we've still got bats in our hands." - Dusty Baker
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 3, 2010 11:55 AM EDT up reply actions
Is it necessary to bitch when you could easily just not click on the link?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 11:57 AM EDT up reply actions
i wasn't so much complaining about the posting of the links
there is something about the articles themselves that don’t sit right with me.
I don’t really give a damn about Bronson, but I don’t think these women need to be dragged into it, and terms like roadbeef seem slightly terrible.
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 12:01 PM EDT up reply actions
Women that decide to become baseball groupies aren't exactly screaming "respect me!"
by Geki on Aug 3, 2010 12:06 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
That pretty much goes for any type of groupie.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 12:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Men or women, BTW.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 12:09 PM EDT up reply actions
A male Bronson groupie spotted.
behind Janish, on the right
by jacob brumfield on Aug 3, 2010 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm pretty sure that person's a minor ...
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 12:55 PM EDT up reply actions
These women must know that taking a ride on the Nasty Hook means they'll end up getting discussed by people like us
I mean seriously, you date an athlete it comes with the territory of being semi-high profile.
And my favorite discussion of the term “roadbeef” was when the Steve Phillips pictures with his Navy Seal emerged. That was some awful roadbeef.
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:24 AM EDT up reply actions
didn't post it to offend anyone.
the Pedro boat pics were put on here before. You can not click on the links.
I really hope that 1st girl ain't his girlfriend
If so, I hate Arroyo even more for awful taste in women
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:21 AM EDT up reply actions
I think they explained it away nicely
There’s girls you can fuck, and there’s girls you can take to a public event with an open bar. I smell a Venn diagram.
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
by jch24 on Aug 4, 2010 11:11 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Is there really a Marge Schott bobblehead?
Have we just run out of people to bobbleize? Why? Why?
This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the losing.
maybe you have, floozy!
nah, real talk, I thought the same thing.
He fixes the cable?
by Colin Auscapee on Aug 3, 2010 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions
you just mixed 'floozy' and 'real talk' in the same comment
impressive
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
They should bobbelize Schottzie
Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."
I cannot currently think of a single other person associated with the Reds organization that I would like to see bobble-headed less.
How about Majewski? Felipe Lopez? Bret Boone. Adam Rosales. Corey Patterson. Willy Taveras.
This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the losing.
Mister Redlegs!
Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."
Bret Boone did an okay job
plus he got us Denny Neagle, who got us somebody from New York who probably got us nothing.
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:46 AM EDT up reply actions
Brandon Claussen
bust city !
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 12:14 PM EDT up reply actions
STEROOOOOOIIIIIIDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSS
"so there was a reason firefox said i spelled that wrong" -- justin007000
you don't think that the damn dog didn't make it onto the bobblehead?
He fixes the cable?
by Colin Auscapee on Aug 3, 2010 11:31 AM EDT up reply actions
he should have his own
Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."
there really is
anybody who goes to the Reds HOF on Fridays, Saturdays, and Sundays can get one!
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:45 AM EDT up reply actions
Hitler was a pretty important figure in German history

I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions
she did wear a swastika from time to time.
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:49 AM EDT up reply actions
Wasn't the story behind that...
that it was a gift given to her late husband by a war buddy?
Marge was pretty clearly a racist, but I doubt it went that far.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
“Everything you read, when he came in [to power] he was good…They built tremendous highways and got all the factories going…Everybody knows he was good at the beginning but he just went too far.”
I get all the mitigating factors – and accept the dualism of Marge. I’m sure she wasn’t a neo-Nazi, but let’s not forget that she actually said that.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 5:14 PM EDT up reply actions
I had forgotten about that.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
you could get one and put her with your minority bobble-heads!
that would make her so mad, being next to a black guy!
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 11:47 AM EDT up reply actions
yeah, cuz that's totally how she felt
I think you need to learn a little bit more about Marge.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
*

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions
A picture is worth a million words
"so there was a reason firefox said i spelled that wrong" -- justin007000
Weren't Eric Davis and Dave Parker her Million Dollar Ni**ers?
I know there was more than 1 Red she included in that phrase.
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:27 AM EDT up reply actions
hence the word million instead of thousand, you slower-than-usual fucker
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
I've been busy getting brainwashed by corporate america (fuck yeah!)
so get bent, fuckface
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 7, 2010 12:20 PM EDT up reply actions
Yes, Mrs Schott, you can handle my watch.
That’s not my watch, mrs schott!
by Gapper on Aug 3, 2010 12:31 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
After Marge died, this is what ED had to say (says more about ED than anything, but also says something about how he perceived Marge)
from the SI Vault:
I met Marge and her Saint Bernard, Schottzie, my rookie year. It was the first time I’d ever seen a dog on a baseball field. But that was her. She tried to make the team a family. She wanted the fans involved. A lot of times she didn’t express it that way, but she truly cared.
On those teams there were black and white and Dominican players. And she didn’t go out of her way to degrade somebody because of his race. After I was traded to the Dodgers and those comments came out about me in 1992, I got a lot of calls from black leaders about what I should do. But I took what she said with a grain of salt.
When you drink, you speak your mind a lot and you get into situations where the wrong people are listening. That’s what got her in trouble. But her comments live on because I still hear them today when people ask me about Marge. It’s unfortunate because deep down inside she wasn’t a bad person.
She brought me out of retirement and back to the Reds in 1996. I played another five years for other teams, but every time I came to Cincinnati, I had a conversation with Marge. I would call her periodically just to say hello because we were friends. The last time I saw her was in 2002, when the Reds played their last home-stand at Riverfront Stadium. She called me Honey. It was her favorite word. She called everybody Honey.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
by Slyde on Aug 3, 2010 12:34 PM EDT up reply actions 5 recs
And on another note that often gets overlooked:
Schott was the first woman to ever BUY an MLB franchise. Not only that — she was the majority owner.
Yes, other women inherited teams and Payson helped co-found the Mets, but Marge BOUGHT the Reds. She was the most powerful woman in the oldest of old-boys clubs — MLB owners. I often think this hurt her more than anything else. The microscope was always focused on her.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:07 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
this is a very good point. Not that it excuses any of her bad behavior, but she deserves some respect for this fact alone
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Exactly. The things she said were wrong but there was a lot of
good there, too.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:12 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah, that's my point
Also, she may not have said the right things, but I can’t imagine she didn’t respect her players. She paid them as if she respected them. The scouts? not so much.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Yes ... the scouts.
“Why are we paying all these people to sit around and watch baseball?” — Marge Schott
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:43 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah, she may not have respected the game, but she definitely respected the player
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
by boobs on Aug 3, 2010 1:45 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Keepinitreal'd
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:45 PM EDT up reply actions
cause "play on, player" is not played...
He fixes the cable?
by Colin Auscapee on Aug 3, 2010 4:30 PM EDT up reply actions
When Marge was forced to sell the team, I remember my Grandma
indignantly saying, “They better find a WOMAN to buy it from her!” I was surprised, because I’d only known her as her racist comments and her mismanaging of the farm system and her obsession with her dogs. That was the first time I realized that some people actually admired her.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:15 PM EDT up reply actions
She did a lot of great stuff for this city.
Her work at Children’s Hospital, the Cincy Zoo and numerous charities. Hell, McAuley’s cafeteria is named after her — and that was a “small” donation.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions
Doesn't make up for re-gifting flowers or treating her office stuff like crap
Rich people are always trying to convince the rest of us they are human by throwing a few coins in the air. Noblesse oblige and all
/cynical’d
Why should it have to "make up for"?
She also refused to raise ticket prices ($12 in 1998 are you fucking kidding me?) and maintained low-cost food options.
Marge took a lot of shit for a lot of things she deserved to take shit for. She rarely gets the kudos she deserves for the stuff she did right. ($1 hot dogs until the day she left)
Like all people, she had good qualities and terrible ones. The bad don’t “make up for” the good anymore than the good don’t overshadow the bad.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:42 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
yep
The point is she doesn’t deserve to be remembered solely for the bad stuff.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
I will remember her for the bad things
but that’s just because I always hated everything about her, except her willingness to pay for her players. you guys can remember the tax deductions and $1 hot dogs
i'll remember her for stopping along the way to her seat
and talking to me and asking me about how i was doing in school and signing my scorecard with a little picture of a paw print.
You are way sweeter than I am
On her way back to her seat she donated 100000 grand to the Hamilton County Republican party and GOPac to directly oppose everything grown up Daedalus cares about.
She probably gave the check right to Brian B to take to Newt Gingrich
Uncle Carl master-minded quite a few Latin America coups too
and, of course, Castellini stinks. I’ve never said anything nice about him as an owner or a person
Except that he's done an exceptional job of running a team that had been mired in mediocrity...
Thing is, I agree with your points almost all of the time, but you seem hellbent on being dour and combative whenever possible. Big Fucking Deal, a rich guy is a Republican. The sky is blue. Water is wet. Has nothing to do with how he runs the franchise.
We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad. Otherwise, you wouldn't have come.
true dat
My problems with him as an owner have nothing to do with his Republicanism. Mostly any problems I had with him were his telling me “losing wouldn’t be tolerated” and then he went out and lost.
Still, he was smart enough to hire Walt and Walt has been everything i had hoped and more.
So, this year has seen me put a little more faith in Big Bob the owner. I reserve the right to change my mind later, but, so far, he’s done a decent job.
When I was in Cub Scouts and Boy Scouts we always participated in the Indian Hill 4th of July parade
and Marge was always there, and I remember her being like any normal grandmother, pinching kids’ cheeks, calling them “honey”, handing out candy, shaking hands with fathers, hugging mothers, and she always rode in the parade in some awesome car.
She always seemed harmless every 4th of July
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:32 AM EDT up reply actions
everyone hates on marge for her bigotry but looks the other way when it comes to the boy scouts
i say that’s wrong!
be against the boy scouts like i have been for years!
I'm against the boy scouts.
Or at least some of their views on certain issues.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Like bestiality?
You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 4, 2010 11:22 AM EDT up reply actions
I thought Marge's bigotry made her more real
I was against the Boy Scouts, thus why I quit
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 9:57 PM EDT up reply actions
I wonder if she could tell us if Hitler liked kids?
The word around the Eagle’s Nest was that he did.
We are way too quick to paint with broad brushes in this country….a person has to be a saint 100% of the time or a monster a 100% of the time to be declared either. I am quite comfortable calling Marge a monster, even though she liked kids and people said nice things about her when she died (it’s usually the opposite!).
Hitler loved kids
Especially Jewish ones. He thought they really added flavor to the soup.
/ban’d myself
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
by crolfer on Aug 4, 2010 9:31 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Sort of a Steinbrenner type moral ambiguity
except with racism. She really does deserve props for the low prices and success of the team under her reign.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:14 PM EDT up reply actions
Nah, I bet most MLB owners have a hint of racism.
They’re just not in front of a mic as often as she was.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:16 PM EDT up reply actions
Let's not get carried away
with the Schott revisionism. Historically, MLB owners have been a racist lot, but I can’t imagine Schott wasn’t on the racist end of the spectrum for her time.
She was probably also one of the most lacking in tact, PR polish and out of touch with the modern era though – so I’m sure that exacerbated things.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:21 PM EDT up reply actions
Agreed. Though she talked more than all except
George.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:23 PM EDT up reply actions
FWIW
I get the impression her racism was not one built on hate, but rather ignorance. It’s kind of like the difference between murder and manslaughter, but I feel like we should make that differentiation. As ED says, she was from a different era…and the alcohol didn’t help.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Ignorance, I agree with.
I hate the “different era” argument.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions
It doesn't excuse it, but it does help explain it...
which is useful if you’re actually trying to change someone’s attitude.
It’s kind of like how many people wouldn’t feel comfortable making overtly racist remarks these days, but have no problems making homophobic ones. It’s no excuse, but people have grown up thinking that even though the former is wrong, the latter is still okay.
Let me write out a formal proof for you.
Nah, I make fun of all sorts of people.
Because I’m an asshole.
I’ll still be an asshole when I’m 75.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:52 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm unretiring (HA!) to comment on this.
This is 100% correct! :)
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 4:42 PM EDT up reply actions
HA!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:44 PM EDT up reply actions
I think the different era is important
not that it excuses it. But it does explain it. I think ED was just willing to say that while he doesn’t like it, he knows that Marge’s upbringing had a lot to do with her belief system, but that doesn’t necessarily make her a bad person to the core.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
They named McAuley's cafeteria after her?
I never noticed that.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:54 PM EDT up reply actions
They did it after you were gone.
I think like 2003, 04 or 05. Something like that. It was that way when my sister graduated in 05.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:55 PM EDT up reply actions
Ah, and I haven't been back since my sister graduated in 04.
That explains it.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:59 PM EDT up reply actions
She also was a vicious bitch of a boss.
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
Maybe she was part Native American?
"so there was a reason firefox said i spelled that wrong" -- justin007000
And part bitch asshole
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
by Madville on Aug 3, 2010 4:01 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
This
We keep humanizing her and acting like she was actually a person.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
by crolfer on Aug 3, 2010 4:05 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Which is very different from humanizing her.
Let me write out a formal proof for you.
by Gray on Aug 3, 2010 4:06 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
I have made the comment and stand by it
Any MLB team could have a Hitler Bobblehead Night and sell out the park. People are retarded over those things.
HUGE IDEA: Next year, have a Marge/Hitler duo bobblehead with a caption of Hitler saying, “I’m not that bad, just ask her!”
"so there was a reason firefox said i spelled that wrong" -- justin007000
1st Place
I’ve been hearing “haven’t been in 1st place this late since ____”.
I made the trip to see the Reds in San Francisco back 2006. They won the first game of the series (before the rest of the road trip destroyed their season) and I remember leaving the park know they were in 1st place.
http://espn.go.com/mlb/standings/_/date/20060824
Even though they were percentage points back, they were 0 games back. Can the 2006 team get a little bit of love for their efforts?
I believe the discussion was "alone in first place"
so 1995 still stands
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
And this time
with a positive run differential!
"We don't worry about the pennant much, we just like to see the boys hit it deep."
by beasleymachine on Aug 3, 2010 11:35 AM EDT up reply actions
but looking at those standings, we'd have to go 7-14 over the next 21 to have the same record as that team, but that team was tied for first
imagine if the other teams had similar records now as they did then. We’d be running away with the division.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
so what does this mean?
This is the latest in the season they’ve been in first place alone since 1999, when they were one game up on 9/28 with 4 to play
First time they've been in first place alone in August since 1995.
in 1999 they were never alone in first in August. They retook first in September.
Yeah, I know. Useless trivia. It’s Slyde’s speciality!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I think you are over-thinking it
None of it matters.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
/glam'd

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:18 PM EDT up reply actions
geez, the entire national league was bad that year!!!
a collective 57 games under .500!
amazing that the Cardinals won the WS that year.
"To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other." - Jack Handey
by JJ on Aug 3, 2010 1:02 PM EDT up reply actions
The Cards
are using a 6-man rotation this week, only so they can lineup Carpenter – Wainwright – Garcia against us next week. Pussies.
haha, pretty sure he didn't use the word pussies, though.
But I kinda wish he had.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Yeah, that's a rec.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 12:05 PM EDT up reply actions
fuck all
I am thrilled for your success, hell I'm amazed by it. Nobody who knows you saw this coming.
by justin007000 on Aug 3, 2010 12:01 PM EDT up reply actions
That's ok. It means they're giving Jeff Suppan an extra start.
If they fear us enough to let that hosebag pitch again, then karma will bite them in the ass.
Karma, thy name is Joey Votto
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Joey Votto's going to bite the Cardinals in the ass?
Ouch.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 12:29 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm thinking
we are throwing some combination of Cueto-Leake-Arroyo. The off day confuses things some. Guess it depends if they are skipping Leake again.
Doubt it.
My guess is the guys you mentioned will be the guys, but it’ll go Leake/Cueto/Arroyo
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Bring 'em on!

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 12:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Harrleson called him a cocksucker.
Pete apparently didn’t appreciate that.
You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 12:27 PM EDT up reply actions
"I hustle all the time but do they call me Charlie Hustle? Nooooo. I get tons of hits but do they call me the Hit King? Noooo. But you suck ONE COCK....."
"so there was a reason firefox said i spelled that wrong" -- justin007000
by jch24 on Aug 3, 2010 12:35 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Or lose one ball!
/Kruk’d
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:14 PM EDT up reply actions
Seriously. Make these whiny sonsofbitches pay.
Beat the shit out of them until they’re begging for mercy and then proceed to stick their heads even further up their pathetic asses. Beat their sorry asses into submission.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Holy crap!
crolfer is spitting pure venom!
We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad. Otherwise, you wouldn't have come.
'Beat their sorry asses into submission.'
nightly routine on the Nasty Hook
by jacob brumfield on Aug 3, 2010 12:24 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
they altered their rotation 2 weeks ago so Wainright would be pitching against the REDS!
Reds fan for 40 years!
Do it Janish.
Take the reigns at shortstop and never let go. Flash some leather, show some range, and carry a big stick. Make us forget about Cabrera, hell, make us forget about Larkin. I want you to dominate.
by jacob brumfield on Aug 3, 2010 12:18 PM EDT reply actions
so, be good enough to where we don't need Hanley?
or, be good enough so we can trade him for Hanley!
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 12:21 PM EDT up reply actions
YEAAAAAAAAHHHHH!

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 12:25 PM EDT up reply actions 4 recs
Which movie's?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:15 PM EDT up reply actions

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 2:09 PM EDT up reply actions 10 recs
That's what will save Detroit!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:31 PM EDT up reply actions
And here I was thinking it was Miguel Cabrera.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
i think it's important to make sure that Robocop Unicorn is always green
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
wish I could rec this twice
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
you must have no clue how annoying that is
let’s just say, you’d be better off breaking that habit
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
more annoying than someone posting the same thing over and over again?
or being a troll? or sexism? no, no it isn’t.
ahem. No THERE isn't
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
ummm. RONG
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
by nycredsfan on Aug 3, 2010 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
uM?
not the way I say it
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
by nycredsfan on Aug 3, 2010 3:29 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
im trying to be helpful
i suppose some people dont want your help
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
by boobs on Aug 3, 2010 3:25 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
tell me again the rules for who's allowed to be a smartass?
i get them confused since they are so arbitrary.
Here they are:
1) Not you
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
by nycredsfan on Aug 3, 2010 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
chill dude
seriously, correcting people’s grammar is one of the most annoying things you can do. No one appreciates it. It’s patronizing.
Being a smartass might be little better, but at least smartasses make a few people laugh. nobody likes know-it-alls.
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
that's LITERALLY what she said!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
There's a green.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:10 PM EDT up reply actions
oops... i think i jinxed Tubby last night in the game thread...
"Now onto more important things: Punching Errorlando Cabrerror in the fucking tits." -Geki
Honestly, I did. He's always been really durable, and you knew after the first month that Dusty was going to play him almost every day.
I guess 35 really is the age middle infielders fall off a cliff, though, in every way.
We’re seeing it with A-Rod too (I still consider him a middle infielder). He’s still good, but not by his standards.
Cabrera’s never been great offensively, but this year he’s been much worse than usual.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
i kinda did.
i had no reason to believe otherwise, really.
"Now onto more important things: Punching Errorlando Cabrerror in the fucking tits." -Geki
Wow. No one predicted this
Fay is saying they’re calling up Juan Francisco.
Doesn’t make a ton of sense to me, unless Votto will be out for a while too (say it ain’t so!)
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I would give him the benefit of the doubt and say he ran out of characters, but it is Fay
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
yeah, that was my first thought too.
I really, really, really hope that’s not the case.
The only thing that doesn’t make sense about that is that if they know Joey’s going to be out a while, I’d think they’d call up Yonder to start.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
They can't be auditioning him for a trade can they?
END wouldn’t get through waivers.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
maybe in the offseason
but even then, you’ve gotta think Yonder is the more likely trade candidate in the offseason, and he’s been the hottest guy in AAA the last 2 weeks, so it would still make more sense to promote him.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Or wait until September.
I don’t get this and I don’t like it.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
but if yonder comes up it would probably be to start
it would be tough to throw him out there to replace votto in the middle of a pennant race.
by calling up francisco they can use him to spot start for rolen, and come off the bench.
So... We have one SS on the team now, correct?
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Well BP could always play SS in a pinch.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:37 PM EDT up reply actions
Actually none. I'm pretty sure they're going to be using a reliever at SS
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Yup
Some guy named Janish pitched in relief last year I believe…I’ve heard rumors he’s played SS before
Bart: "Dad, what's a Muppet?"
Homer: "Well, it's not quite a mop, not quite a puppet, but man... (laughs, then pauses) So, to answer you question, I don't know."
Right, but that only makes sense if they think Cairo is a better choice to start than Yonder
which I suppose could be what they think
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
well he's played well
and has been on teams in pennant races in the past
yonder doesn’t have a single major league at bat.
it makes sense to think cairo is the better option at this time
Sure
I just don’t know how wise it is to have Cairo playing every day. He’s been great as a bench guy and as a starter when we need him, but it still makes me a bit nervous.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
cairo playing everyday is definitely not the ideal scenario
especially the way the outfield is hitting
We need Jay Bruce to become Jay-Hova again.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Has Rolen ever played 1B?
This is just a thought that crossed my mind. Don’t know why, but it did.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:36 PM EDT up reply actions
I don't want to take his glove off of third.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
True. But I don't want End's out there either.
1B Rolen
2B Cairo?
SS BP
3B Janish
Not likely, but maybe?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:38 PM EDT up reply actions
I would have called up Valaika or someone to man second rather than putting Cairo there.
END should not be up here…
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
END isn't bad at 3B, and he's shown he can be really effective in short stretches
I wouldn’t mind him spelling Rolen instead of Cairo. Still, that means Cairo is at first, which means……
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I just wish the dude had some plate discipline.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
we all do, but he's the type of guy that, until he gets exposed and scouted extensively, can do some serious damage, esp. as a PH
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Doesn't take a whole ton of scouting to look at his minor league stats and see that he never walks.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
yeah, but it's one thing for a pitcher to hear that, and another for him to be convinced to never throw a FB and never throw anything near the plate
Pitchers have known the same thing about Alfonso Soriano for years and yet many still give him fastballs on the lower half of the plate that he can golf over the fence.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Yeah? Well
We can’t just unleash END on the league! What happens when pitchers’ children start disappearing? Are you just gonna blame it on bad scouting? This is serious man. He’s gonna eat their kids!
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Let's send him to St. Louis immediately. He could shut the whole city down!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
(END likes your kid, thanks)
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
by crolfer on Aug 3, 2010 1:50 PM EDT up reply actions 6 recs
This was a very underrated comment
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Aug 3, 2010 6:24 PM EDT up reply actions
Has END ever played C?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions
These are completely irrational ideas coming to me. Sorry, everyone.
1B Hernandez/Cairo
2B BP
SS Janish
3B Rolen/Cairo/END
C Hanigan/Hernandez/End
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions
Wow.
Farney really MUST be your copilot.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:20 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
fuck that.
he’s got to be the pilot.
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 2:22 PM EDT up reply actions
why move every single infielder around? its smarter to stick with
1b cairo
2b phillips
ss janish
3b rolen
by onemoreredoctober on Aug 3, 2010 2:23 PM EDT up reply actions
The whole craziness comes from END being at 3B. I don't trust him at all.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:33 PM EDT up reply actions
i think we all have these concerns because we associated the last few bad years with Edwin
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
Probably. And I have no issue with that.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:43 PM EDT up reply actions
me either
i just think its funny that this site went from a bunch of edwin apologists to being scared shitless of anyone like him. Me included
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
i have an email from a high ranking member of this site
apologizing to me for people being rude to me when i said that Edwin wasn’t all that good.
x

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:53 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
ash was the biggest edwin apologist
she wouldn’t listen when i said “send his ass to louisville”
SIMONTACCHI!!!!!!!!!!
Yes, yes she was.
I remember her blabbing about him in college during drunken nights a Larry’s. RIP Larry’s
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:57 PM EDT up reply actions
You weren't the one who said it!
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 4:45 PM EDT up reply actions
Only after you heard it shouted by some drunk guy in a wife-beater at a game.
You are such a follower!
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 4:52 PM EDT up reply actions
FANTASY STATS!
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 4:54 PM EDT up reply actions
I do too! He's a fan of meatballs and breasts!
He might have played baseball, too. Not sure about that last part.
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 4:59 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
More like
1B Cairo
2B BP
SS Janish
3B Rolen
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
Does this mean that they DL'd Cabrera?
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
What I think this move means
Janish is the starting SS. At least til the end of August, or whenever Cabrera returns. Otherwise, they would have made sense to call up Cozart. This seems like a positive.
Cairo is starting at 1B for as long as Votto is out. According to Fay, it’s not a DL situation (at least not yet):
Francisco isn’t here because Votto is out is he?//Don’t think so. If Votto was going on the DL, he’d be in Cincinnati.
The Reds think Francisco is the best they can add and still have the infield covered. If Cairo is at first, END becomes Rolen’s backup and Ramon probably becomes the emergency 1B. As strictly a bench bat, it probably makes sense to pick up Francisco over Sutton, Valaika or Cozart.
Laynce Nix might see some more playing time in left with Gomes struggling (at least until Dickerson returns). Francisco becomes the power bat off the bench to face righties.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:19 PM EDT up reply actions
Nope. END to Centerfield.
I mean, maybe even to RF. He’s done in July what Bruce has done all year…11 HRs.
/doc’d.
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 2:21 PM EDT up reply actions
defense doesn't matter! Statheads suck! Sushi ruins baseball!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
At AAA - there has been little correlation between what Fransisco has done at LV versus what he's cone at cinti
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
Fair enough
As a bench bat, I guess he is the best option. Definitely gives you some power. Also, Nix seems a bit more obsolete now…
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
I surmised they might play Nix more in LF
just based on how they’ve handled this kind of thing in the past (Nix is further up the pecking order), but it could also mean that Francisco gets some time in left too. I’d be surprised if they bumped NIx for Dickerson, but maybe END is getting an audition to play the Nix role, possibly with an eye to the playoffs. Francisco would probably hit about the same as Nix this season, but he has the added benefit of being able to back up Rolen.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Agreed. END is a lot like Nix, but better.
Better power, doesn’t strike out quite as much, doesn’t completely suck against lefties.
The defense is the only part where Nix has the edge.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
doesn't strike out as much?
are you sure about this?
Better hitter than Nix, possibly. Better player, I’m not sure, which is worrisome.
Actually, for their careers, they are quite similar in K rates
but END has made some progress recently.
Still, all the more reason to be scared of him as a prospect.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Hey, did you guys hear?
The Reds are calling up END!
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Fay is like Geraldo Rivera.
He’s letting all the Reds secret roster moves out for public consumption. Now the Pirate brain trust will have time to develop a plan to annihilate us this evening.
There's a party in my pocket and everybody's having a ball.
by Joe Nolan's Glasses on Aug 3, 2010 1:59 PM EDT reply actions
I think that's a cancer kid. I am not making a joke here. That's sad.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:26 PM EDT up reply actions
So they're going to make him suffer more by putting him in a Pirates uniform and sitting him on their bench?
Damn, and I thought cancer was bad enough by itself….
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:45 AM EDT up reply actions
So...END to spell Rolen while Cairo covers Votto at 1B?
Why not give Votto the Pirates series off so he’s ready Friday?
by chazzilla on Aug 3, 2010 2:18 PM EDT via mobile reply actions
I'm now going to hold a candle light vigil for Joey's wrist
there is nothing to beer, but beer itself
by HalMorrisHasALazyBat on Aug 3, 2010 2:26 PM EDT reply actions
Wow. Intimidating lineup tonight
Phillips 2B
Janish SS
Cairo 1B
Rolen 3B
Gomes LF
Bruce RF
Heisey CF
Hernandez C
Leake P
I honestly might bat Leake 2nd in this lineup
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Heisey in center three days in a row.
Huh.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:28 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh, he's definitely on audition for Stubbs' job at this point.
And I’m convinced Stubbs gets sent to AAA when Dickerson gets activated later this week.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Although with Francisco
I say get rid of Nix and have Stubbs glove around for LIDR. Although he admittedly need some hitting and bunting work.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Hopefully Dickerson will hit better than Stubbs
on his return, but given their relative strengths and weaknesses at this point in their careers, I think they’re interchangeable. And so are Nix and Francisco. Francisco gives the team a little bit more flexibility by playing 3B, while Dickerson can be called on to hit righties in LF, so I’d favor keeping those two around.
The real question will be whether Heisey can keep it up hitting if tried as a mostly fulltime starter. If he can,that’ll be huge.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:48 PM EDT up reply actions
seriously
With those 8, you have to go
Heisey, Phillips, Rolen, Bruce, Gomes, Cairo, Hernandez, Janish.
Not too hard Dusty. Might even help Bruce get some pitches to hit.
Nah, esp. against a lefty
I’d go
BP
Heisey
Rolen
Gomes
Hernandez
Cairo
Bruce
Janish
But if I was being bold, I’d seriously consider batting Leake 2nd
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
vs. a lefty
Jay Bruce would be nowhere near my lineup.
I don’t care what kind of slump Stubbs is in, he’s in my lineup vs. a lefty.
Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.
by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Aug 3, 2010 4:14 PM EDT up reply actions
So dumb
that Bruce, Heisey, Hernandez and Leake are the bottom four.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:30 PM EDT up reply actions
Cairo as a #3 hitter doesn't upset me
at least, not right now. He’s been a hot bat. It’s against a lefty. He’s been getting on base.
It’s Janish at #2 and Heisey at #7 that I have questions about.
"To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other." - Jack Handey
by JJ on Aug 3, 2010 2:53 PM EDT up reply actions
So If on April 1
Someone said you would be in 1st place on August 3rd, and would have this lineup that night would you have told them they were nucking futs?
Lineup vs. Pirates
Phillips 2b
Janish ss
Cairo 1b
Rolen 3b
Gomes LF
Bruce RF
Heisey CF
Hernandez C
Leake P
I would have been disappointedurprised, because I remember hearing a ST interview with Dusty and sMarty
where Dusty told sMarty they brought Cairo in because he can play first. Personally, I’ve always thought anyone could (Joe DiMaggio’s ghost later informed me it’s harder than you think and reminded he hated playing 1st). Nonetheless, seeing Cairo playing first would mean Joey’s out and that would make me sad
Cairo in the 3 slot is ridiculous.
(Now watch him go 3 for 4 etc etc)
"I think walks are overrated unless you can run... If you get a walk and put the pitcher in a stretch, that helps. But the guy who walks.. they're clogging up the bases.. ."
--Dusty Bake - Fearless Visionary Manager
dustys so dumb
1b… gotta be the 3 hitter
by onemoreredoctober on Aug 3, 2010 2:29 PM EDT reply actions
Unofortunately I'm not sure who else to put there right now. Although Janish batting 2nd is...
questionable.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
i know pickins are slim but i would probably
put phiilips there.
by onemoreredoctober on Aug 3, 2010 2:38 PM EDT up reply actions
So dumb his team is in first place
“Players’ managers” do this stuff all the time: the replacement bats in the injured guy’s place in the order, unless the regular is gonna be out for a long time.
PS Ken Griffey, Jr rarely played first and he batter third here until he was banished.
Maybe that's why they had to get rid of him
The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!
you can't possibly argue with me and say this is a good move.
you make your lineup with the best possible chance to score runs. miggy cairo doesn’t feel like a better replacement because he’s in votto’s slot.
by onemoreredoctober on Aug 3, 2010 2:34 PM EDT reply actions
but
thank you for the education on griffey and not playing 1st.
by onemoreredoctober on Aug 3, 2010 2:35 PM EDT reply actions
If OCab does hit the DL
I’d just go ahead n bring up Dickerson
How much longer til Dusty's gone?
by in_Votto_We_Trust on Aug 3, 2010 2:45 PM EDT reply actions
I think you have to bring up someone who can play the infield
The team effectively has too injured IF right now in Votto and Cabrera. Hence Francisco.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:49 PM EDT up reply actions
two*
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:49 PM EDT up reply actions
Also too injured.
If they were less injured, that’d be nice.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 2:58 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah but CDick's due back Wednesday-ish I believe
so I’m sure they’ll just wait til then to figure it all out
How much longer til Dusty's gone?
by in_Votto_We_Trust on Aug 3, 2010 2:54 PM EDT up reply actions
Oh, for fuck's sake!
At least it would clear up some of these outfield questions.
The morons will be yelling for it. Stupd assed ideas!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:50 PM EDT reply actions
The best part is when he says Jim Edmonds is better right now than either Drew Stubbs or Jay Bruce
would anyone bet that, over the rest of the season, Edmonds could outperform either of those guys (offense + defense)?
I sure don’t.
Having said that, I’d LOVE Manny on this team for a couple months. What a trip!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Think about it -- Chad and TO in training camp and Manny in left.
Cincy would be a hotbed of sports personalities!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:54 PM EDT up reply actions
i agree...
manny on this team would be phenomenal. i’d bat him 6th right after bruce. watch bruce’s production skyrocket.
"Now onto more important things: Punching Errorlando Cabrerror in the fucking tits." -Geki
But do you trust Dusty to not make an outfield of Manny, Nix/Dickerson, Gomes?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:14 PM EDT up reply actions
manny on this team!
the offense would be nice. The fake injuries would be infuruating. What he would do to sMarty and Cowboy’s 1970’s Southern sense of ……. let’s say….decorum would be worth watching/listening every night
Edmonds is better than Bruce and Stubbs.
but NOT Gomes! Haha.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
This was the single most objectionable thing in the article:
Put him in leftfield, move Jonny Gomes to right and Dickerson to center, and let’s go.
I can’t imagine a worse re-jiggering of the outfield, at least defensively. Two huge liabilities on the corners and your worst (though still decent) of three options playing CF. No Chris Heisey – who’s arguably hitting the best of any OF on the team, and two platoon players starting, I assume, fulltime.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 2:56 PM EDT up reply actions
Yep, like I said, the morons will be clamoring for it.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 2:58 PM EDT up reply actions
people need to realize that dickerson is terrible
he’s worse than bruce, stubbs, gomes, and heisey.
the only reason people want him to play is he’s always injured so we don’t know how bad he is
I know this. I think most of us do. But we're not "most people"
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:03 PM EDT up reply actions
Also,
So if Jose Guillen is a non-starter, and your options are, say, Jim Edmonds and Manny Ramirez, what do you do? By the way, doing nothing is not an option, and became less of one Monday night. You can demote Bruce and/or Stubbs. But if you think Chris Dickerson is going to be Mr. September, you’re on medication.
WTF? Who’s saying he’s going to be Mr. September or that he needs to be?
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:04 PM EDT up reply actions
I also love this one?
Adam Dunn? Jose Bautista? No and no.
Ummm, why ‘no’ on Bautista.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:02 PM EDT up reply actions
CUZ P-DOC THINKS HE'S LAZY!!!!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:16 PM EDT up reply actions
It's fucking times like these I wish FJM was still around.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:04 PM EDT up reply actions
Deputize thyself
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:06 PM EDT up reply actions
I can't. I'm only clever enough to watch Ron Swanson. Not right for him.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:07 PM EDT up reply actions
You're clever enough to make a weird pun on the word "write"
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:08 PM EDT up reply actions
Don't confuse clever with retardation.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:09 PM EDT up reply actions
Walk the line
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:15 PM EDT up reply actions
If Chapman's callup really is imminent
I wonder who he replaces. Cordero, Rhodes, Masset are all entrenched. Ondrusek probably should be too. Smith has been pitching really well. I’d probably trust Bray more as a lefty out of the pen at this point than Chapman. Seems like Isringhausen, Burton and Chappy are competing for Springer’s spot.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:13 PM EDT reply actions
meh. I don't think they are tied to Bray, nor should they be.
He’s been passable, but one bad outing could make his line look terrible.
I still think he’s probably as good or better of an option than Chapman, but if they think he’s ready, they’re not going to worry about demoting Bray.
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
I just question the idea that Chapman's arrival is imminent
Seeing as he’s not a clear improvement over Bray right now. I could see adding a third leftty, but I could just as soon see another guy at AAA take that final spot. And they’re going to give Springer at least a week or two.
I think you’re probably right that Bray’s spot is tenuous.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Bray is not getting lefties out
…. and that is the one job they want him to do.
The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!
Yep.
Chapman would be at like negative zero.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
He's inconsistent
On Sunday, he walked the two lefties he faced in a crucial spot. However, the night before, he was pretty good. I just think they don’t trust him yet against lefties in a critical spot.
The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!
adam dunn placed on waivers
"Now onto more important things: Punching Errorlando Cabrerror in the fucking tits." -Geki
Do it and piss of P-Doc! I'm still pissed at that column.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions
*off
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:27 PM EDT up reply actions
You mean WHO's hyped!
Let me write out a formal proof for you.
by Gray on Aug 3, 2010 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
You don't get it.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions 3 recs
Dunn, P-Doc, Marge, Hitler, Rehashed Arguments, Who?, Moral Preening, Justinasms, Avatar Bets, Sexism, Grammar Pettiness (Usage, Actually ::ducks::), Where Griffey Can't Play, RoboCop, Self-righteousness, EdE, Lineup Kvetching
Now this, by God, this is a Red Reporter thread.
If you walk out of here tonight and see a man c***-flapping, you run with that man.
by Man Mountain on Aug 3, 2010 4:01 PM EDT reply actions 8 recs
definitely a good argument
If you walk out of here tonight and see a man c***-flapping, you run with that man.
Jim Edmonds.
You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions 8 recs
WINNAR!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions
We're just getting ready for football and college basketball season
When’s this baseball stuff gonna get out of the way?
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
Not til November, bitches
If you walk out of here tonight and see a man c***-flapping, you run with that man.
by Man Mountain on Aug 3, 2010 4:06 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
Oh, and religion too.

You are as dumb as anything you hate.
by Pops Daniels on Aug 3, 2010 4:07 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Stupid autotext!
Depauw was number 10 on the party school list, which ain’t bad for a school with 2100 students and no athletic scholarships!
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter. Buy The Wire-to-Wire Reds today!
He has diabetes.
I bet you feel bad now.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
You're wrong (correct usage!)
Your cousin having diabetes does not improve the quality of your original story, nor does it influence my emotions.
Plus, diabetes is very treatable these days.
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 9:59 PM EDT up reply actions
un;ess he gave him a cupcake, he shouldn't
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
God, I hope not.
That’s almost as boring as talking about mortgages.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions
You, sir, have been green'd.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions
Maybe one reason END got the call is Valakia is injured
He left Saturday with an injury trying to turn a DP. Didnt play Sunday, and still not in the Bats Lineup Tonight:
Dickerson CF
Cozart SS
Alonso 1B
Frazier 3B
Balentien RF
Dorn LF
Miller C
Griffin 2B
Sutton DH
LeCure P
Valakia and Sutton only 2 infielders on the full 40-Man. Sutton has been terrible. So maybe END by default?
That actually makes a lot of sense, and makes me feel better that Joey may not be badly injured
Sorry for not knowing that, everyone!
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
It's a good sign that Votto is still in Pittsburgh
and that the Reds didn’t call up a catcher or 1B-capable player from AAA.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 5:10 PM EDT up reply actions
END doesn't play any first?
I thought Fay tweeted that he did.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
I think that was his attempt at humor.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
And I love your signature.
I’ve never noticed it before.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
I hate alcohol-fueled epiphanies
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 5:15 PM EDT up reply actions
The best kind of inspiration!
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
i had one a couple weeks ago... "Everything will be fine if you let it"
it changed my life for like an hour and a half
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
I'm sure he's technically capable
just like virtually any other position player on the team. But I don’t see that he’s played it in the minors, at least not this year.
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Aug 3, 2010 5:16 PM EDT up reply actions
So, back to baseball stuff.
With Janish at short, what should the line-up be?
Mine:
1. Heisey
2. Phillips
3. Votto
4. Rolen
5. Bruce
6. Gomes
7. Hanigan/Hernandez
8. Janish
But, you know the SS has to hit second.
You are as dumb as anything you hate.
Awful lot of green in here!
And we didn’t really even have much good news today. Playing the Pirates sure is good for RR morale!
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
dammit
my internet was down all afternoon. /kicks dirt
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 5:02 PM EDT reply actions
You should have at least thrown second base, Piniella style
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:03 PM EDT up reply actions
Anyone know this...
What 3 players have been with their original team for 11 or more seasons in the NL? I’ve got 2 of the 3 I think.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
Larry Wayne Jones...
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:04 PM EDT up reply actions
That's one that I had.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
Rollins, really?
Hell!
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:05 PM EDT up reply actions
Ah, I was missing Rollins.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
Was this a trivia question from something?
I just got the text from a buddy. Figured he was just trying to stump me.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
It's deja vu all over again.
Todd Helton, Chipper Jones, and Jimmy Rollins (because 2010-2000=11 years. Don’t ask me how, I just went to high school on a math scholarship.)
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 5:15 PM EDT up reply actions
Well that is 11 season.
Or parts of at least.
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
The same way 2001 was the new millenium not 2000!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:16 PM EDT up reply actions
Funny how people who graduated in 2001 always bring that up
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:17 PM EDT up reply actions
I graduated in 2000....
THAT WAS THE MILLENNIUM!! WE WERE SPECIAL!
What does a mama bear on the pill have in common with the World Series? No cubs.
I WAS MORE SPECIAL
I GRADUATED IN THE FIRST YEAR OF THE TRUE NEW MILLENNIUM!
/idon’tgiveacrap
"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK
mine was better
my grad year is a palindrome!
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 6:03 PM EDT up reply actions
/2002'd
me too!
Wait, college or HS?
see what I did there with uzr? it’s like a LOL cats saber-pun combo.--Verka Serduchka
Over-achiever...
We graduated from college the same year.
"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK
I'm your age Scrabbles!
Though I graduated college in 2006.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 6:11 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah...
i kicked college’s ass. it’s not a big deal or anything. whatevs.
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 6:13 PM EDT up reply actions
I'm just happy I got through OSU on time.
With all the extra GED BS they make people take I was glad to do it in 12 quarters.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 6:16 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah
gen ed is for schmucks, right?
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 6:18 PM EDT up reply actions
I think they are when they don't relate to your field
and there’s no way to test out of them.
Econ: Yes, good GED. Basic Biology? No. Phys. Ed.? No.
There’s a good amoung or money-grabbing there.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 6:22 PM EDT up reply actions
as a man who teaches gen ed
i can tell you that it almost definitely relates to your field. if you dont see it that way, then the prof let you down.
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 6:27 PM EDT up reply actions
Being told I HAVE to take a phys. ed. class by the
University does not have anything to do with my major. These were University requirements — not individual college requirements.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 6:29 PM EDT up reply actions
yeah i know
but phys ed is important. if the prof cant relate it to the real world then they arent doing their job.
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 3, 2010 6:37 PM EDT up reply actions
My badminton instructor was a Chinese TA studying molecular genetics
She barely spoke English
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 6:39 PM EDT up reply actions
NKU -- No Knowledge University
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 11:49 PM EDT up reply actions
They asked an OSU professor!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 4, 2010 12:13 PM EDT up reply actions
That's how it is at a major state university.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 11:49 PM EDT up reply actions
My badminton instructor was 65 years old
and offered an A to anyone who could beat him in one game.
Nobody got a free A.
"Red Reporter - An elitist clique full of like-minded douchebags." - BK
Hah!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 4, 2010 12:17 AM EDT up reply actions
that's the tOSU way
for all those kids who don’t figure out what they’re gonna do until Junior year….
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 7:50 AM EDT up reply actions
See, I knew what I wanted to do since the 7th grade.
But retarded university rules made me do this shit. It’s the same at just about any MAJOR public university.
If the school is a research institution — undergrads always have to do this sort of shit. They do it at Michigan, Purdue, UCLA, etc.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 4, 2010 12:18 PM EDT up reply actions
true statement
I never did understand the requirement for gen ed, especially if you know exactly what you wanna do
by Highlifeman21 on Aug 4, 2010 10:01 PM EDT up reply actions
In 7th grade all I wanted to do was watch cartoons, figure out a way to get to touch the things growing out of the front of the girls, and try to get my dick to calm down or put it somewhere noone else would see it
Over 20 years later, and here we sit. Any sage advice?
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
Ugh. There ARE things about basic biology that college grads should absolutely know.
But these do not include dissecting flowers and memorizing the Krebs cycle.
This team wouldn't be so bad if it weren't for all the losing.
Agreed.
Or dicking around some pond to find specific flowers.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 4, 2010 12:14 PM EDT up reply actions
Too easy, drill sergeant
"He couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn with an elephant." - My Main Main Mads
I graduated in 2002.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:18 PM EDT up reply actions
I know. I didn't mean to imply you.
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:20 PM EDT up reply actions
I graduated in 2001, and I don't think I've ever brought that up anywhere.
I do like to refer to my life as a space odyssey, though.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 5:22 PM EDT up reply actions
I was teasin'
It was, for whatever reason, a hotly debated topic at my high school. Stupid Juniors! c/o 2000!
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:24 PM EDT up reply actions
You shouldn't tease so much. It makes you look funny.

by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 5:26 PM EDT up reply actions
I think you'd just have to shave your head at that point. Yeesh.
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:28 PM EDT up reply actions
Daisy, Daisy!
/giantspacebaby’d
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:25 PM EDT up reply actions
HAH!
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:43 PM EDT up reply actions
we graduated together!
i dont remember seeing you at the ceremony. What were you wearing?
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
Cap and gown. You?
Also, I went to an all-girls high school, so while there were plenty of boobs in my class, I don’t think any of them were you.
by the finest muffins on Aug 3, 2010 5:41 PM EDT up reply actions
boobs i figured you to be older than me
but we’s the same age
He fixes the cable?
by Colin Auscapee on Aug 3, 2010 5:46 PM EDT up reply actions
I disagree. But that's only because I know my own.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:48 PM EDT up reply actions
x

Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:54 PM EDT up reply actions
Why are there so many damned recs in this thread?
RRers are lovin’ them some RRers today!
He fixes the cable?
*we is prouda us! :)
"There is no such thing as an innocent Gatorade cooler."
by Ash on Aug 3, 2010 5:25 PM EDT up reply actions
you don't get it
Retractions are for journalists! -Gray
by boobs on Aug 3, 2010 5:39 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Cuz we're pretty fucking funny.
Eighty-five percent of the f*ckin' world is working. The other fifteen percent come out here. A f*ckin' playground for the cocks*ckers.
-Lee Elia on Cubs fans
by Farneyismycopilot on Aug 3, 2010 5:25 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs

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