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Around SBN: Blake Griffin Slam Dunks: NBA Jam Style

Opening Day Game Thread: Part 4


Im no longer employed by the Red Reporter Union, but those guys don't seem to be around, so here you go.

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Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 3:43 PM EDT reply actions  

Rolen

Was his walkup music Viva la Vida?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:44 PM EDT reply actions  

Yes

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Guess how I know he's gay?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT up reply actions  

no, not Livin la Vida Loca

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

The fact that LaRussa broke off their torrid love affair?

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

I think it's like a one time per game power up thing...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:20 PM EDT up reply actions  

Although he's got an ofer

Phillips AB’s today are encouraging.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT reply actions  

Agree'd

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

/tourettes'd?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

FUCKKKKKKKKKKK

not sure what you mean?

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:38 PM EDT up reply actions  

If you don't know what I'm talking about.

Marcum hasn’t allowed a hit. Hamilton is up with one out in the 7th.

by Brian B on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT reply actions  

you know that umpire sucks

he will go after Dusty

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT reply actions  

That sure looked low

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:45 PM EDT reply actions  

NICE!

You suck Freese.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

Error

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

E5

Bet they miss Rolen!

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

C'mon Jay

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

Cards fans can't like that.

Freese looking BAD

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Come on, Jay

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:46 PM EDT reply actions  

let's go BRRRUUUUCE

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

RALLY CAPS?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

GREAT IDEA

Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

NICE

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

That was a great pitch to crush

And he swung right through it

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Damnit Jay.

That was a pitch to hit.

Oh neat double steal!

by jsl413 on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Nice steal!!

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

SB'S!

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Fuck yeah, BP!

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

Only if he makes it there

It’s fucking stupid otherwise

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

Down 3

It’s absurd in the 8th inning

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

woot

BP steals 3B.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 3:47 PM EDT reply actions  

God I'm freaking out

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT reply actions  

HAVOC!

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT reply actions  

What the hell Jay!?!

Another pitch to crush.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT reply actions  

jerk

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

*pheasant thought.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

DAMN

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

JAY NO-VA

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Galdern

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

What a disappointment

3 hittable fastballs

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

Man...

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

LIGHT TOWER?

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions  

I like Stubss up here

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

do we suck yet?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

SIGH

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

COME ON, STUBBY!!!

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

MASSET HOUND IN THE PEN

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:50 PM EDT reply actions  

LET'S ALL TYPE IN CAPS

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT reply actions  

OK

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

(RALLY CAPS)

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

GET IT?

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT up reply actions  

HE'S CLUTCH!

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

nah man, it's cool.

He’s a clutch RBI guy

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT up reply actions  

3-2 pitch season on the line

if you’re gonna do somethin do it here

by homerun21 on Apr 5, 2010 3:51 PM EDT reply actions  

How many Reds players are from Texas?

Seems like a lot.

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT reply actions  

FROM TEXAS:

HOMER BAILEY
DANNY RAY HERRERA
JAY BRUCE
PAUL JANISH
Logan Ondrusek
Arthur Rhodes
Laynce Nix
Drew Stubbs

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

I think I can see where Choke-man-monie flew out.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

ha

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

exactly, actually. :)

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

MAN, I'M SO GLAD THAT WE DIDN'T START STUBBS

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT reply actions  

so why didn't Stubbs start?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT reply actions  

Dusty better not sit Stubbs ever again unless he asks to

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT reply actions  

INFIELD STUBBS RBI!!!

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:52 PM EDT reply actions  

YAY, STUBBS

HOOK ’EM, HORNS!

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

SO... DUSTY LOOKS LIKE A MORON.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

OK I'M ON BOARD WITH THE CAPS.

BUT MAYBE DUSTY PLANNED DREW STUBBS COMEBACK ABILITY

by jsl413 on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT up reply actions  

THAT WOULD INVOLVE SOME FORM OF INTELLIGENCE

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

Dusty is a smart guy

but he isn’t baseball smart…

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

JOHNNY BETTER BE IN THE ON DECK CIRCLE!

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

OH YEAH STUBBS DIDN'T NEED TO START

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

CLUTCH MAN MONIE?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:53 PM EDT reply actions  

0-2 PITCH...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:54 PM EDT up reply actions  

C'mon Ramoan. Prove Dusty right about something today.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:54 PM EDT reply actions  

DOES THIS GUY THROW ANYTHING BESIDES A 92 MPH FASTBALL?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:54 PM EDT reply actions  

CHOKE-MAN MONIE FROM NOW ON.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:54 PM EDT reply actions  

think they are a bunch of fuckin cubs fans

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT up reply actions  

FUCK

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

hold 'em Masset hound

imagine if Lincoln didn’t pitch…

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

nuts

Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel
is just a freight train coming your way.

by btcoop71 on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

sigh...

caps off

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

is a cuaffle

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cuaffle-man-monie

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

Well...one more chance.

Gomes, Dickerson, Cabrera up ? (In theory)

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

Seems likely.

Maybe Gomes can hit a solo home run so Joey can bat.

by jsl413 on Apr 5, 2010 3:56 PM EDT up reply actions  

Another rally killed

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

rally caps disengaged

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 3:55 PM EDT reply actions  

My rally caps are still on

Mostly because I like the way it looks on me

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:56 PM EDT reply actions  

You're doing it wrong...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:57 PM EDT up reply actions  

I do everything wrong

Don’t you know that about me by now?

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions  

TWSS?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

Losing by 2 runs would be a delicious irony

Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Apr 5, 2010 3:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Masset has quite a test...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:57 PM EDT reply actions  

Gomes, Hanigan, Janish!

"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin

by BK on Apr 5, 2010 4:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Don't thank God for that

Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Apr 5, 2010 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

Gotta be Gomes

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 3:59 PM EDT up reply actions  

so walk the batter that proceeds Puljols

that won’t end baddly…

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 3:59 PM EDT reply actions  

Pujols is made of flesh and blood

He shouldn’t be able to hit 3 HRs today, ok?

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:00 PM EDT reply actions  

can we hit puljols in the face?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:00 PM EDT reply actions  

Masset just got everyone to cheer...

Up and in, 96 MPH heat to Pujols.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:00 PM EDT reply actions  

shoulda hit him the fuckin nose

woulda really helped the Reds chances. Puljols is insured and well paid.

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:01 PM EDT up reply actions  

Agree'd

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

jolsinhisface?

Facejols?

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

LaRussa would have every batter in every game against the Reds beaned until he was incarcerated.

by ol Pete on Apr 5, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

he'd bitch about it

remember when he bitched about Aaron?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:03 PM EDT up reply actions  

You mean when he was locked up?

by ol Pete on Apr 5, 2010 4:04 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's time to play the Ron Robinson card.

That will shut Albert down.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:01 PM EDT reply actions  

So much for that.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:02 PM EDT up reply actions  

True Creature!

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'll try a bearded card next time. Rookie mistake.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Scott Rolen is old...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:01 PM EDT reply actions  

Nice rundown.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:02 PM EDT reply actions  

Last Cardinal to have 4 hits on opening day was Aaron Miles.

Ironic.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:05 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm so glad we had Dickerson's superior defense in CF over Stubbs

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Well.... that sucks

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:05 PM EDT reply actions  

Yep. Fuck this game.

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 4:05 PM EDT reply actions  

C-Dick is having a piss-poor game.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:05 PM EDT reply actions  

0-for-4, throwing error that cost a run, didn't run out a close play on a ground out.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

But he won't be be benched...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cya in the minors CDick!

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:06 PM EDT reply actions  

i miss this

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 4:06 PM EDT reply actions  

i was waitng for you to way in on this

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:06 PM EDT up reply actions  

no way!

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

C-Dick airmails it

Wants to give Brett Gardner a run for his money, I guess.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:06 PM EDT reply actions  

GRAND SLAM!?!??!?!

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Goodnight, Irene.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

holy shit

Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

WOW.

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

that was priceless

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Well... I guess I can't hate Lincoln as much now

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

Sure you can.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

Wow

Nick Masset shit the bed.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

so Masset has to hit the next batter

right?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:07 PM EDT reply actions  

I'd like that.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT up reply actions  

ugh

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

Wow...

Grand Slam. Yeah, screw this.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

wow he was WAY out ahead of that

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

This game was soulcrushing.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

jukich'd

Alway the optimist...I like your think kid...

by boobs on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

Nix sucks ?

1 for 2 with a nice running catch LF?

Potential doesn't win games.

by Madville on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

He shouldn't have been starting...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

I could understand Dickerson in left...

But Nix should not have played…

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

nor been on the roster

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cherry picking Mads?

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

not for about 40 years now

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

And the 1 hit came

When he tried to pull and outside pitch and the ball found a hole in the infield.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Bean this guy...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

Haha, and I was feeling sorry for the nationals.

Clearly, I should not have bothered.

IAN! I'm on traain!

by andromache on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

Chris dickerson

what can I say…I’m sure its not the day he’d hoped for.
He had problems last season playing well defensively in LF.
Masset sure hasn’t helped either.
But mostly I blame Dudsy

Potential doesn't win games.

by Madville on Apr 5, 2010 4:08 PM EDT reply actions  

Losing Opening Day sucks

Seeing that the Cardinals clearly are going to outclass us by a mile yet again makes it even worse.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT reply actions  

True.

But it would nice for once to put our best guys against them just to see just how much better they are. Instead, we’ll try to gimmick them to death.

by Brian B on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT up reply actions  

I think it means

Stubbs instead of Nix, and someone other than Miguel Cairo being your first pinch-hitter off the bench.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

No, but it can break it.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

it's not one game

it’s how every game will go with dusty baker as manager.

by Daedalus on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

//1999'd

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:14 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yay fantasy team

Molina with some much needed points.

What?

This game was over >_>

by homerun21 on Apr 5, 2010 4:09 PM EDT reply actions  

heretic...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

heretic...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT up reply actions  

Remember 1990, when Lou Piniella seemed to always push the right buttons at the right times?

This is Dusty Baker, and it is not 1990.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT reply actions  

dusty's daughter'ed

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

And I would not be around...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:12 PM EDT up reply actions  

I still don't get why Stubbs didn't start.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT reply actions  

I reiterate

One game does not a season make.

Potential doesn't win games.

by Madville on Apr 5, 2010 4:10 PM EDT reply actions  

Very true.

It’s still sad to watch though.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Get the bad games out of the way now?

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 4:11 PM EDT up reply actions  

Thank god we're not defending world champs

… because then it’d be really embarrassing.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

The Reds might never win again!!!!!!

Or, it could be only one game.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:12 PM EDT reply actions  

Probably the former.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:13 PM EDT up reply actions  

0-1

Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 4:13 PM EDT reply actions  

Masset only

gave up 20 earned runs in 76 innings last year. He just gave up 5 in his first outing. Guess he’s getting the earnies out
of the way early.

If it wasn't for my horse, I never would have spent that year in college!

by Joe Nolan's Glasses on Apr 5, 2010 4:14 PM EDT reply actions  

Franklin still has something dead on his chin...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:14 PM EDT reply actions  

TLR's mother's vag trim

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions   1 recs

IT'S NOT ONE GAME

IT’S MORE OF THE SAME BS MANAGERIAL BULLSHIT WE’VE DEALT WITH FOR A DECADE NOW.

by Daedalus on Apr 5, 2010 4:14 PM EDT reply actions   1 recs

Thank you.

Phone's ringing, Dude.

by rjdio on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

ANGER CAPS!!!!

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

I feel better now.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT up reply actions  

you scare me

Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT up reply actions  

Sigafoos!

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:14 PM EDT reply actions  

Dickerson being booed.

Good.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT reply actions  

They are booing Dusty

via C-Dick.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:18 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's too bad

Dickerson seems like the type to cry about it in the shower later on.

by ken on Apr 5, 2010 4:20 PM EDT up reply actions  

IF C-DICK HUSTLES TO THE SHOWER LIKE HE DID EARLIER IN THE GAME

THERE WON’T BE ANY HOT WATER TO WASH AWAY HIS TEARS.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

I missed that

What happened? Didn’t run out a grounder?

by ken on Apr 5, 2010 4:22 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yeah, 2nd at-bat.

He jogged, but would probably been out anyway. But hustling 90 feet is exhausting.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 6:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

I'm rooting for a strikeout...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT reply actions  

Gomes should have taken that 2-0 pitch.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:15 PM EDT reply actions  

Dang... why did Dickerson just get a hit...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT reply actions  

Now he gets a hit

Thanks CDick

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT reply actions  

Dickerson reaches the Mendoza line!

Now Dusty will pinch-run Arthur Rhodes.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT reply actions  

Haha of all times for Dickerson to get a hit.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT reply actions  

At least Lando will suck...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:16 PM EDT reply actions  

Another quality at-bat

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:17 PM EDT up reply actions  

Come on Joey.

Hit that 6 run homer

Needless to say, this didn't work and everybody died.

by SullivanSmith on Apr 5, 2010 4:17 PM EDT reply actions  

it is in your name...

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

Another hit from Votto...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:18 PM EDT reply actions  

BP is so good...

5 run game…

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:18 PM EDT reply actions  

imagine if Masset didn't blow up?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:19 PM EDT reply actions  

It hurts.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:19 PM EDT up reply actions  

yea

go team

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:19 PM EDT reply actions  

yay, BP!

I picked you to get the most RBIs, so good work!

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:19 PM EDT reply actions  

You know....

if you had told me this morning that we’d score 6 runs, I would have been pretty pleased.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:20 PM EDT reply actions  

the picture of an optimist

I’m excited about the 6 runs and think that that the Cardinal runs are just a bad day.

If you're not having fun, stop participating.

by redandblue on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

REDS-CARDS GAME.

SUTCLIFFE IS TALKING ABOUT MARIANO RIVERA’S PLAYOFF GAMES.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:20 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm resisting the urge to root for his cancer.

I’m resisting, don’t worry.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT up reply actions  

Fuck him.

I wish upon Rick Sutcliffe throat cancer.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:22 PM EDT up reply actions  

Godamn Petey.

Funny, but uh…

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

Alright fuck it.

Wish death on whomever you please.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

Hurry up and end this- I need to go to work...

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT reply actions  

I'm fairly pleased with the offense today.

Some positives.

I was right about Miguel Cairo for infield utility!

by chazzilla on Apr 5, 2010 4:21 PM EDT reply actions  

I know we're quick to come to Harang's defense

but if he’d pitched the 6th without an ER, he’d have a quality start.

Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Apr 5, 2010 4:24 PM EDT up reply actions  

It's not a great stat

But 3 ER through 6 would be far from a terrible start.

Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Apr 5, 2010 4:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

true

it was lincoln who should have a voodoo doll

by Daedalus on Apr 5, 2010 4:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

Make it look like this

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

The Cardinals are a really good offensive team

and Harang struggled today. But he will have about 31 other chances to do better this year…

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:40 PM EDT up reply actions  

At least we get to root against the Cubs now.

It doesn't matter what you think, or what I think. It's what Dusty thinks that matters, and he's a knucklehead.

by PeteyHendrix on Apr 5, 2010 4:22 PM EDT reply actions  

Reds lose

Be prepared to read that about 90 more times this year /sigh

by RedsMasochist on Apr 5, 2010 4:23 PM EDT reply actions  

Don't forget

he’s a racist, toddler cannibal.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:27 PM EDT up reply actions  

Hey,

any man who looks that comfortable holding a baby is alright in my book.

If it wasn't for my horse, I never would have spent that year in college!

by Joe Nolan's Glasses on Apr 5, 2010 4:29 PM EDT up reply actions  

He's only looks comfortable

because he knows his appetite for children’s souls is about to be temporarily satiated.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:30 PM EDT up reply actions   2 recs

Slogan:

Change you can believe in.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 5:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

alrighty, see some of you on wednesday!

Running out to frontyard laughing! -Fat Vegas Alan

by GrooveLeg on Apr 5, 2010 4:25 PM EDT reply actions  

not true

the soviet union fell in 1991, so i’d say they lost in the end.

by Daedalus on Apr 5, 2010 4:31 PM EDT up reply actions  

But Barack was elected

and health care passed.

So really who knows?

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

I don't mind the politics

… but no way am I eating beets!

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:50 PM EDT up reply actions  

Opening Day losses are more painful than most other losses

But I’m still glad baseball is back. Have a great evening everybody.

Go Butler!!

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:29 PM EDT reply actions  

agreed on all accounts.

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:47 PM EDT up reply actions  

I have to say, crappy game all around

But good to see Votto, Stubbs, and Ondrusek and the other youngsters ready to play. Even Brent Musberger had a pretty good game. I was happy with him calling some people out (Cabrera, Sutcliffe), and he didn’t say anything too dumb.

by Brian B on Apr 5, 2010 4:29 PM EDT reply actions  

im still upset about gettin rid of balentien

batted .327 (16-49) in spring..they made up their mind about him before spring even started.

How much longer til Dusty's gone?

by in_Votto_We_Trust on Apr 5, 2010 4:30 PM EDT reply actions  

Wait.... one more tidbit

The last out of the Nationals’ loss to Philly was made by The Virus! Maybe that will make some of you feel a little better.

The season doesn't start until the Cincinnati Reds take the field! Reclaim The Opener!!

by TheC on Apr 5, 2010 4:30 PM EDT reply actions  

So, let's say I have genital warts

and you want me to feel better because someone else has herpes?

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:33 PM EDT up reply actions  

Yes

That someone else happens to be the ex-girlfriend who you hate a ton and gave you the warts in the first place.

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 5:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Crolfs

I underestimated your prowess. Good luck at the clinic.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 5:45 PM EDT up reply actions  

Psh

No speaking from experience here. My relationship with my ex would not lead to warts of any kind, and I have no hard feelings… so THERE!

"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."

by crolfer on Apr 5, 2010 6:07 PM EDT up reply actions  

Cubs OFers

Kinda suck.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:33 PM EDT reply actions  

I was just watching that.

It’s funny to see Marlon Byrd stumble around out there in center.

by Brian B on Apr 5, 2010 4:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

The second I switch the game on someone clocks a long one against El Toro

by ol Pete on Apr 5, 2010 4:34 PM EDT up reply actions  

you saw

future rookie of the year Jason Heyward’s first at-bat in the big leagues.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

just like Jermaine Dye's first at bat

Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.

by justin007000 on Apr 5, 2010 4:48 PM EDT up reply actions  

And Jason Heyward homers

Starting his ROY campaign already.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Apr 5, 2010 4:34 PM EDT reply actions  

Sorry,

It’s Mike Leake’s to lose.

A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.

by Pops Daniels on Apr 5, 2010 4:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Crap, I missed it!

I turned it to the end of the Ranggers game and missed it!

by Brian B on Apr 5, 2010 4:35 PM EDT up reply actions  

Something tells me it’ll be shown a few times

by ol Pete on Apr 5, 2010 4:36 PM EDT up reply actions  

Vent thread here:

http://www.redreporter.com/2010/4/5/1406537/post-game-anger-thread-reds-lose#comments

Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Apr 5, 2010 4:43 PM EDT reply actions  

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