Red Reposter - The Curse of Josh Hamilton is a Weird Curse

le nombre rouge: $121,584.70 (Salary Edinson Volquez will forgo during suspension, according to CNATI)

Big news day in Reds Country. For those late to the media circus surrounding The Ejaculate Misconception, The Wagon was handed down a suspension of 50 games for use of a banned substance, characterized as a "performance enhancing drug." The simple takeaway is that the suspension hurts the player not the team, as Volquez will serve his 100K+ time out while he would have been on the disabled list anyway, recovering from Tommy John surgery. According to John Fay, Volquez will be allowed to train in Goodyear AZ and would not have been ready to pitch prior to the end of the suspension.

Volquez maintains the substance he took was meant to aid in conceiving a child. In the Post-Dick Pole Era, I urge you all to resist juvenile sex punnery.  Try not to say something like, "Well I guess the Reds offense isn't the only thing lacking potency" OR "SEX... uh-huhuhuhuhuhuh." Let's be adults. For all you fertility cynics,  Volquez's official statement strikes me as genuine-sounding - or at least plausible - though players certainly have lost any benefit of the doubt in these matters. Here's an excerpt:

"Although I understand that I must accept responsibility for this mistake and have chosen not to challenge my suspension, I want to assure everyone that this was an isolated incident involving my genuine effort to treat a common medical issue and start a family.  I was not trying in any way to gain an advantage in my baseball career.  I am embarrassed by this whole situation and apologize to my family, friends, fans, teammates, and the entire Reds Organization for being a distraction and for causing them any difficulty.  I simply want to accept the consequences, learn from the mistake, and continue to strive to be the best person and baseball player I can be."

MLB Trade Rumors takes another look at the Hamilton-Volquez swap
The Josh Hamilton Curse is a two-way street. Given the parallel arcs of successes, injuries and embattlements, the trade still looks pretty even, though I think the scales tip to the Reds given Volquez's age and injury prognosis. More importantly, the Reds also pulled down Danny Ray Herrera, currently the most productive piece of the deal.

CNATI takes its turn in the echo chamber
C. Trent cuts through the media sludge to tell us, simply, that the suspension hurts Volquez, but not the Reds. 

The Fancy New York Times deigns to write about the Reds
This article is a little bit longer than the others. Bud Selig declares the steroid era over about halfway through.

From our own JinAZ, a drilling-down of the drug details
His remarks from yesterday's discussion shed light on the plausibility of Edinson's family-startin' explanation, though the gory details may only appeal to PED-philes (sorry, I couldn't help myself): Most are of these drugs are either gonadotropins themselves (LH & FSH stimulate sperm production by stimulating testosterone production and increasing the ability of the testes to respond to testosterone), or they act to remove factors that could otherwise inhibit sperm production. Sperm production, of course, is tied to testosterone production. And the classic anabolic steroids are, of course, testosterone and its derivatives. So, the story checks out. Volquez should have known better, though. The banned drug list is posted in every major league clubhouse, and there is a major eduction program in place to remind players to check the banned list before putting ANYTHING into their bodies.

CNATI offers a love letter to Paul Janish
PJ had the decisive RBI single in last night's win/near-disaster. On top of a torrid start to the season in limited action, "Janish had a stellar spring, not only hitting .350 and slugging .600, but using the constant switches of spring to prepare him for coming into games after they started." You have to wonder how long both Janish and Hanigan will continue to be Red-hatted stepchildren.

Mark Sheldon reminds us that a 14.00 ERA is bad
Nick Masset has been struggling mightily lately, but his job is not in jeopardy. This should be no surprise to anyone. The season is young, Masset was highly effective over last year, he's signed through 2011 and out of options. "Who's the better replacement?" asks Dusty - and I have to agree with his timely use of the rhetorical question. Fay reminds us that apparently Jared Burton is currently injured. And then engages in wild speculation about using Aroldis out of the bullpen. 

Kinda glad this story doesn't mention the Reds
MLB teams are setting low attendance records left and right. 

OMGReds reopens the wound that is Jorge Cantu's 2007 release
If you have any positive national coverage of the Reds, please send it to the Reds Communications Department. I'm sure they'd appreciate it.

Chris Dickerson wants you to recycle electronics
And this time, it's personal. OK I don't know if it's personal - whether Chris grew up in a town where used electronics were overflowing the dump - but here's a dose of uplift to close out the Reposter. Chris is doing some good work, even if the karma seems to be dragging Drew Stubbs down. Maybe Reds PR flacks can get this story to bury that one about Volquez. Apparently, his non-profit is called Players for the Planet now. I'm guessing We Play Green tested poorly, given the easy inclusion of the preposition "for" into the proceedings. There's some evidence to suggest that Earth Day is coming up or has just recently happened, so bake up your Earth Day cakes and get out the Earth Day May Pole.