Red Reposter - that sweet smell of pickles is coming from Matt Maloney's bedroom
Fay - New guest instructors
At the bottom of Fay's blog post yesterday, he notes that Dusty Baker has brought Tony Phillips and Ellis Burks into camp as guest instructors. Phillips is helping the young infielders, while Burks is presumably working with the outfielders. Dusty played with Phillips in Oakland in the mid-1980s and managed Burks in the late 1990s with the Giants. Phillips, incidentally, is an old sabre-fave partially due to his ridiculously high 14.5% career walk rate over 18 seasons. Baker does not state whether the two will remain as permanent coaches.
Baseball Musings - Dusty Making Sense
Musings links to the above Fay post, where Dusty sings the praises of Enerio Del Rosario. Rosario throws a hard sinker that Dusty claims is ideal for inducing double play groundballs. Musings then ranks relievers by DPs per opportunity for all relievers since 1974 with at least 100 such opportunities. Former Reds David Weathers and John Franco come in at around 12%, towards the top of the list.
Chapman to see intrasquad action Thursday!
Unfortunately, the game is not open to the public. The Reds stated that Chapman will pitch one inning. Aaron Harang, Homer Bailey, Enerio Del Rosario, Jordan Smith, Logan Ondrusek, Alexander Smith, Philippe Valiquette, and Pedro Viola are also scheduled to pitch.
CNATI - Maloney at ease in big leagues
Matt Maloney's brief late season success with the Reds last year came despite a blister on his left middle finger. Which turned out to be a good thing for young Matt's development: With the blister, Maloney couldn't throw his cutter and his curveball was subpar. "My curveball was just really slow. I couldn't really get the extension on it and finish it," Maloney said. "It helped me figure out to throw a two-seamer and a sinker, because I couldn't put my pressure on the middle finger and I had to put the pressure on my index finger and it helped me get sink on the ball." Now he has those pitches to go along with his cutter and the curveball is back to where he wants it.
There's also a story about spilled pickle juice in the Maloney's bedroom. Which I'll let you read for yourself or let your imagination run wild.
Diamond Hoggers - A Grande comeback?
When FSN announced their Reds broadcast schedule, they also threw this in: As previously announced, Thom Brennaman will serve as the play by play voice for the majority of Reds game telecasts this season. Cincinnati native and longtime broadcaster Paul Keels will be the play-by-play announcer for the remainder of the Reds schedule. Both broadcasters will team with color analysts Chris Welsh and Jeff Brantley. George Grande will also return to his play-by-play announcing role in September on a limited basis.
Diamond Hoggers isn't crazy about Grande, but what I'm disappointed in is the lack of Jim Kelch, the voice of the Louisville Bats. I thought he did a fine job in spot duty with the Reds last year. Did Paul Keels do any games last year?
BPro - Reds Team Health Reports
The entire article is subscription only, but I don't agree with what I saw in the publicly available portion. The author falls back on the tired Dusty stereotypes in talking about Homer Bailey (and Cueto and Volquez), the Reds' "big risk": [D]espite not having a history of injuries (other than a bothersome groin), [a] number of things go into this ranking, including his age, increase in workload, and his mechanics. Bailey was recently named in Tom Verducci's "10 for '10: Young aces most at risk of Verducci Effect." The 23-year old finished 40th in baseball in Pitcher Abuse Points with 27780 in only 20 major-league starts. Bailey's innings jumped from 147 2/3 innings pitched in 2008 to 203 innings in 2009. He was one of the game's top pitchers in his final nine starts of 2009, and the Reds leaned on him heavily during those starts. The La Grange, Texas native averaged 112 pitches per start during that time, furthering the thought that Baker likes to ride his top horses.
Bailey also never topped 120 pitches in averaging 112 per start, which I've never seen considered abusive. The issue with his mechanics is also not discussed.
Dewayne Wise still hanging on
Dewayne Wise continues to bounce around the league, but at least he's got a good story from his perfect game-saving catch last year. Apparently he also has a painting in his living room commemerating the catch given to him by Mark Buehrle. This year Wise is in the Phillies' spring training camp and will likely start the year in AAA.
NYT - Catching up with Chad Moeller
Chad Moeller is with the Orioles this year, playing Yoda to Matt Wieters' Skywalker. Moeller recalls some of his more memorable battery mates, including Aaron Harang: Six-foot-seven, very big. He throws an invisible fastball: a lot of them are right down the middle, and they don’t hit it. First game I caught for him, we went into the eighth inning, he just gave up his second hit and the guy was on third. And then he tripped going to the plate, caught his spikes and realized he was going to be called for a balk, so he flipped the ball over. But the delay had taken too long, and that was the only run he gave up. The manager told me I was going to catch him every time after that, and I never caught him again. It was really strange. Moeller is talking about this game, on May 15, 2007. Harang threw rocks for nine innings and the Reds beat the Padres 2-1 in 12 after a Ken Griffey homerun. Moeller is wrong about never catching Harang again, however. He started Harang's next start on May 20, when Harang gave up five runs in five innings against Cleveland. You can never trust a Moeller man.
0 recs |
144 comments
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Comments
I love Paul Keels.
And if you haven’t heard him yet, I think you will too.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
He's FSN's new #2 PBP man for the Reds.
From Wikipedia:
Paul Keels is the current play-by-play announcer for Ohio State University’s football and men’s basketball teams for WBNS Radio and the Ohio State Buckeyes Radio Network. His career began in his hometown of Cincinnati as a News Anchor/Report for WLW Radio in 1979. He then left for WJR Radio in Detroit to call games for the NBA Detroit Pistons. (1980-81) Then came a move to WWJ Radio in Detroit to call Football and Basketball for the University of Michigan from 1981-87. Following a year at UPI Radio Network in Washington DC, Paul returned to his hometown of Cincinnati in 1988, to become the voice of the University of Cincinnati Bearcats and host a sports talk show on WCKY-AM. From 1992-95, Paul hosted a Morning News Show on WHIO Radio in Dayton. In 1995, he again became play-by-play voice for the University of Cincinnati on WLW Radio, then in 1996, added the Bengals play by play duties. Following the 1996 football season, WLW’s parent company, Jacor Communications, lost the rights to the Bengals, and Paul continued Broadcasting Football & Basketball for the University of Cincinnati. He joined WBNS Radio and the Ohio State Buckeyes Radio Network in 1998….
In October 2007, Keels was inducted into the Radio Television Broadcaster’s Hall of Fame of Ohio, and was Co-winner of the Ohio Sportscaster of the Year Award in 2007 by the National Sportscasters and Sportswriters Association of America.
According to reds.com, on December 7, 2009, Keels was added to the television broadcast team of the Cincinnati Reds.
Keels Graduated from Moeller High School in Cincinnati, and studied Communications at Xavier University.
So, as you can see, he’s good. But what the Wik’ doesn’t mention is that he has that awesome “voice of God” that you want your announcers to have. Kalas-esque. But deeper (maybe?) and more authoritative.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 8:33 AM EST up reply actions
He'll be a'ight.
He’s done football and a lot of basketball which are much more demanding of a PBP guy than our favorite sport. Especailly on the radio.
Remember, he’s doing the call of the games- not the color commentary- so we don’t necessarily need to him to constantly pull from all of his many past experiences in baseball as some do.

"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 9:22 AM EST up reply actions
As long as Anthony Munoz
isn’t paired up with him, as on Bengals preseason games, I guess it will be OK. He does have good pipes, but he’s a little dry for my tastes. I think he used to do UC football & basketball before heading to OSU. He’s been around forever. also, I think his family used to own an automobile dealership in Cincinnati. He also looks like a less attractive version of Charlie Steiner.
If it wasn't for my horse, I never would have spent that year in college!
by Joe Nolan's Glasses on Mar 3, 2010 12:51 PM EST up reply actions
I agree with the assessment of Paul Keels.
He does Buckeye football and basketball and is fantastic at it.
Also, he will never be doing Saturday games in the fall because I’m pretty sure he’d miss his own wedding to call a Buckeye football game. It doesn’t matter, we wont be playing after the first month of college football anyway…
It's kinda funny.
One of the reasons that I like him so much is because I don’t think see him as that much of a homer. To me, he’s much better than Terry Smith (who was like having your golly-gee friendly Sunday School teacher call the game- a la George Grande) and he is rather professional in his approach- almost as if he’s still in awe of the enormity of OSU athletics (and the reverenc paid to it by so many). He seems to get excited when a good or great play is made and usually in Buckeye games, the good or great plays are being made by the Buckeyes so maybe he comes across that way to some. (Bear in mind that I’m a Buckeye fan and I follow them pretty closely but I’m not a fanatic and I don’t usually care for Buckeye fanatics.)
The guys they always have paired up with Keels (is it Lachey now?) are usually over-the-top homers and that’s fine for a color guy working on the OSU network but it doesn’t usually add anything to the broadcasts. If OSU had middling or losing athletic teams, then I’d have much more appreciation for having a cheerleader in the booth. As it stands now, I can get my high fivesYee-haws from the yahoo sitting next to me at the bar.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:26 PM EST up reply actions
Agree.
I don’t think Keels is a homer at all, just that he loves calling college football.
It is Lachey and Karsatos for football that he is paired with, and the always entertaining Ronnie Stokes for hoops.
I'll take your word for it for the time being
As long as he talks about OSU football less than Thom does, I won’t be complaining.
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 9:56 AM EST up reply actions
Which current Red would look the best with a blowout?
My vote is either Nix or Arroyo
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 10:10 AM EST up reply actions
After seeing Nix in street clothes last year
I could see him as a GTL kinda guy.
by Brendanukkah on Mar 3, 2010 10:11 AM EST up reply actions
The gym I go to has 2 tanning booths
All it needs is a dry cleaning place, or a place that does laundry for you, in close proximity and I’d swear I live in Seaside Heights, NJ, minus the boardwalk…
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 10:26 AM EST up reply actions
Jay Bruce!

Every time I see him, his hair looks different.
If we can include former Reds…Adam Rosales! It would look natural on him, since he’s always running around like his hair’s on fire anyway.
All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?
Ditto on the Dusty stereotypes in Will Carroll's article
Will also complained about on Cueto’s usage. But Cueto similarly was well protected last year. He got tired, if for any reason, not because of Dusty but because of winterball/WBC. Good pitchers accumulate PAP’s because they pitch more than other pitchers. The question is how they’re accumulating them, and as you said, it’s not like either Cueto or Bailey are throwing 120+ pitches in outings.
Furthermore, the good tests I’ve seen of the “Verducci effect” (Greenhouse’s article and Bradbury’s article) found no effect, so it’s time to stop harping on that until we see some evidence.
-j
I write at:
Beyond the Boxscore | Red Reporter | Basement-Dwellers.com | Twitter: @jinazreds
Carroll spent a lot of time at game 2 last season talking about Dusty abusing pitchers
I think maybe he’s locked that image in his head and has failed to re-evaluate it properly. Personally, I don’t believe Dusty is particularly abusive. I think maybe he’s a little more over the top in pitcher expectation than most managers, but it’s not to the extreme that I expected when he came to the Reds. I’d say it’s way down on my list of complaints about Dusty.
As for PAP – until I see a good correlation between PAP and injury, I don’t take it for anything. I think there are too many factors (mechanics, effort, weather, etc) that go into pitcher injuries for us to predict them based on usage alone. I think it’s worth studying, but I kind of get the impression that PAP was developed, they noticed a couple of cases that fit, and then they just started using it. I can’t imagine they’ve proven much of a correlation. That would be hard to do.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
Woolner had a good piece in the BPro Annual a few years ago on this
Basically, yeah, no clear relationship as I remember it. Both PAP and Verducci effects are essentially myths, and will be until we see some solid data.
-j
I write at:
Beyond the Boxscore | Red Reporter | Basement-Dwellers.com | Twitter: @jinazreds
I'm intrigued by this quote fro Fay
Del Rosario, 24, was a combined 3-1 with a 1.68 ERA and 12 saves while moving from Sarasota to Carolina to Louisville.
He had a 1.68 ERA and moved all the way to Triple A. I wonder, when he gets traded to Toronto, will he also be a “future American League Cy Young winner”?
c'mon, you need to start refreshing your snark
it’s getting stale. :P
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
Not until I see a retraction!
Fine, though, I will go into a day long hibernation and write some new material.
On a serious note, a obscene sinker ball pitcher in the bully would make me very happy
All I took from this comment was that you are really into obscenities
which is why you are the downfall of this clean, family friendly site.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
single-handedly, no less
Personally, I blame obc. What he did to his Rosales bobble head has scarred me for life
BTW, this from the guy who started the porn discussion below
If I didn’t love you so much, Slyde, I’d really hate you
Porn discussion below?
See ya down there.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:00 PM EST up reply actions
TWSS
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
Baby drinking horse semen'd.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 12:59 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Definitely a good argument
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 9:42 AM EST up reply actions
I can't help looking at that picture in the Reposter
and imagine that Jocketty is thinking, “Mmmm, yeah, just like that. Keep that shoulder in, baby. Yeahhhhhh, you know how to work it.”
He looks like he’s watching baseball porn.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
by Slyde on Mar 3, 2010 9:37 AM EST reply actions 1 recs
If you build it, they will come?
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
Bull Do 'Em
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
by Slyde on Mar 3, 2010 10:38 AM EST up reply actions 2 recs
The Natural (Redhead)
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 10:44 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs
6-4-3 Double Penetration
Calmer than you are.
by 3 Fast 3 Furious on Mar 3, 2010 10:45 AM EST up reply actions
Eight wangs out.
IAN! I'm on traain!
by andromache on Mar 3, 2010 10:52 AM EST up reply actions 3 recs
Hard Balls
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
Damn Spankings
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 10:59 AM EST up reply actions 2 recs
Mr. 3000 inches
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 11:03 AM EST up reply actions
Pride of the Spankings
A Pete Rose by any other name would still smell of cheap hookers and pinetar.
by Pops Daniels on Mar 3, 2010 11:04 AM EST up reply actions
Rookie of the Year
Loses His Virginity
by Charlie Scrabbles on Mar 3, 2010 11:41 AM EST up reply actions
Also known as
Nookie of the Year
by the finest muffins on Mar 3, 2010 3:18 PM EST up reply actions 3 recs
Bleacher Bums
Parts 1-8
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
by nycredsfan on Mar 3, 2010 12:07 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Bad News Bears Go To Japan
A bukkake documentary by Ken Burns
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 12:17 PM EST up reply actions
Natural Bush Leaguers
Before the curse of stastics fell upon mankind we lived a happy, innocent life, full of merriment and go and informed by fairly good judgement.
-Hilaire Belloc
Bingo Schlong and the Traveling All-Stars
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 12:59 PM EST up reply actions
A League of Her Moans
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:07 PM EST up reply actions 4 recs
The Joys of Hummers
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:30 PM EST up reply actions
Major League III: Backdoor in the Minors
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 2:19 PM EST up reply actions
(Yellow) Fever Bitch
"aaron harnann is so aweseom" - justin
by BK on Mar 3, 2010 2:22 PM EST up reply actions
Put me in the two Hole.
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
The Fan
(unrated version)
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 3:14 PM EST up reply actions
Cobb
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
by Slyde on Mar 3, 2010 3:14 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Damn you! I spent way too long trying to come up with one for that one!
and rec’d
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
The Sandtwat
and
Mrs. 3000
Yeah, those guys and the Cincinnati Reds. They're a terrible football team. / Because they're a baseball team? / Exactly. You know who's the worst football team? The Philadelphia Flyers. - Best Show
by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Mar 3, 2010 2:29 PM EST up reply actions
The Chicago Chicken
I just knew that I would now be having train sex with a very odd broad in no time. I didn’t expect the bitch to shoot me though. (Pops Daniels)
Milwaukee's South Side
Guy-on-guy action in areas you don’t wanna be.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 3:15 PM EST up reply actions
I bet Yahoo is really happy they bought SBN today...
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
I'm not sure you got that right
Yahoo doesn’t own nor have even a part ownership in SBN.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
formed an alliance with SBN?
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
Toeing the Rubber
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
Down and Inside
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
Based on Balls
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
The Nookie
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
Eric Milton's Contract
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
by PeteyHendrix on Mar 3, 2010 3:53 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
The Man with Four Balls
Before the curse of stastics fell upon mankind we lived a happy, innocent life, full of merriment and go and informed by fairly good judgement.
-Hilaire Belloc
That is creepy
Why can’t I stop picturing his head on a goat’s body?
by Brian B on Mar 3, 2010 10:59 AM EST via mobile up reply actions
Because you can take Brian B out of the country...
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:07 PM EST up reply actions
I was about to post about how great that picture is
It has to be one of the top 20 reposter pics. Jocketty looks very creepy in that pic in no simply conventional way.
That's what I was going for in a PG way
But man, you’re 2 for 2 in the unofficial caption contest so far.
by ken on Mar 3, 2010 3:47 PM EST up reply actions
Re: Jim Kelch
Won’t he be on the radio fairly often? Yes, here it is. I’m guessing that’s why he’s out as a TV guy.
by the finest muffins on Mar 3, 2010 10:03 AM EST reply actions
So the Reds have 7 announcers if you count George's limited September role?
That seems like a bit much. Reds.com also lists Kent Mercker as an announcer. I almost hope somebody calls him from the clubhouse and to yell at him about comments he made. At the least I want somebody try to get him kicked off the team charter.
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
by justin007000 on Mar 3, 2010 12:45 PM EST up reply actions
But if you don't count Grande, it's the exact same number as last year.
One guy left (Grande) and one guy was added (Keels). Other people played job musical chairs, but they were all around in 2009.
by the finest muffins on Mar 3, 2010 1:14 PM EST up reply actions
But Grande is still here...coming back once football season starts and the top talent goes off to bigger weekend paydays.
Regardless, the Reds have had a good supply of broadcasters in the past and we all know too well how long it’s been since the last winning season so it’s clear that we need more broadcasters.
"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 1:29 PM EST up reply actions
does pickle juice really work?
Al Leiter tried it, but said it didn’t work for him. The Yanks traded him because he struggled so much with blisters.
All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?
The Yanks should have told him to use his other hand
Problem solved
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 10:27 AM EST up reply actions
Moises Alou says no
"They're the ones that gave you the keys, they can’t get upset when you crash the car" -- 'tHan on my being a mod
by jch24 on Mar 3, 2010 12:23 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Harang was named the Opening Day starter
according to everyone on Twitter.
According to CTR, the rotation will be Harang, Cueto, Arroyo, Bailey, 5th. I like that Baker split up Cueto and Bailey. Hopefully that will help save the bullpen if neither pitcher can go deep into games.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
Yep, slide Maloney into that 5th spot and you've got a decent little rotation
No real aces, but the potential for 3 #2 types and 2 #3-4 types.
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
I'll bite
Cueto’s a #2, and I’m assuming you’re lumping Harang & Arroyo as #2s as well, leaving Bailey and Maloney as #3-4s?
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 11:06 AM EST up reply actions
I said potential
so, to me, Cueto, Harang, and Bailey could all be potential #2 types, Arroyo a #3 type, and Maloney is a #4-5 type.
Bailey being a #2 type is a big question mark, but Arroyo hasn’t been that good over a whole season in a while. His ceiling at this point is a #3 guy, I think. (not that there’s anything wrong with that.)
It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
Unless it's a gangbang.
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
I really think Cueto pitching to contact more
(economizing his pitch count) and learning to rely more on change/slider to get ahead and fastball to put away (which is what Bailey did last year) could make him an ace. I gots high hopes for that little bastard
I too hope that Maloney gets a fair shot at the #5
He’s a lefty.
jch is a left
Ash is a lefty
BK is a lefty
Yours Truly is a lefty
anyone I leave out?
’tHan?
Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
I wish I was a lefty :(
LB is and it makes me jealous.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
because we are so handsome
and intelligent
by Charlie Scrabbles on Mar 3, 2010 11:51 AM EST up reply actions
I thought you had a significant other?
Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
by Madville on Mar 3, 2010 1:43 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
rec'd
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
Because I would be an even beastlier pitcher
And I have it in my mind that if I was a lefty I would somehow be pitching at a D2 or D3 college.
"People don't kill people. Burning oreo packages kill people."
Both of my parents are lefties
But I am not left-handed, which is proof that genetics is more complicated that Mendel’s punnett square (and therefore beyond my ability to comprehend.)
Personally, I’m jealous of the ambidextrous crowd. That would be a handy skill to have (pun not intended originally, but definitely left in intentionally.)
by the finest muffins on Mar 3, 2010 12:01 PM EST up reply actions
I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
by Slyde on Mar 3, 2010 12:06 PM EST up reply actions 3 recs
This made me pee a little
Before the curse of stastics fell upon mankind we lived a happy, innocent life, full of merriment and go and informed by fairly good judgement.
-Hilaire Belloc
James Garfield, former president of Hiram College and the country,
was ambidextrous and could write in Greek with one hand and Latin with the other at the same time!
by Brendanukkah on Mar 3, 2010 12:13 PM EST up reply actions
bfd
i can clap with both hands at the same time, while standing on one foot!
by Charlie Scrabbles on Mar 3, 2010 12:17 PM EST up reply actions
If people wonder what it sounds like when one hand is clapping
Then it will blow their minds to hear two hands clapping!
by Brendanukkah on Mar 3, 2010 12:19 PM EST up reply actions
Damn. Show-off.
All I want to do is not get smeared pastels all over my right hand.
by the finest muffins on Mar 3, 2010 12:21 PM EST up reply actions
what's so odd about that?
I just knew that I would now be having train sex with a very odd broad in no time. I didn’t expect the bitch to shoot me though. (Pops Daniels)
Can't argue that
There was also a statue of him (another version of the one in the Capitol Rotunda) erected in Hiram, and that night, vandals cut off its head. The dude just attracts bodily harm.
Unlike the actual Garfield, the head was later recovered and reattached.
by Brendanukkah on Mar 3, 2010 10:29 PM EST up reply actions
Speaking of Garfield
I fucking hate that comic and that fat fucking cat…I hope he is dead.

Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
He's not dead but he is in like a quasi-meta-limbo.

"Let's get this movie. We already have the underwear."
by Fat Vegas Alan on Mar 3, 2010 11:34 PM EST up reply actions
Bill Murray's one regret
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
by justin007000 on Mar 3, 2010 11:49 PM EST up reply actions
Good Lord
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
by justin007000 on Mar 4, 2010 10:26 AM EST up reply actions
He told me B
He liked it but rated it behind Frost/Nixon. Further proof that he is a raging fucking idiot.
"They're the ones that gave you the keys, they can’t get upset when you crash the car" -- 'tHan on my being a mod
Dr. Hobson also said it was a choice.
Why am I so snarky today?
by Brian B on Mar 3, 2010 2:47 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Cuz you've been reading the commenters over at teh Fay's blog?
Just take the ball and throw it where you want to. Throw strikes. Home plate don't move. - Satchel Paige
ah but there is a heavy burden
being asked to spell the word … some folks just can’t handle the strain.
I just knew that I would now be having train sex with a very odd broad in no time. I didn’t expect the bitch to shoot me though. (Pops Daniels)
I wish I was left handed
I want to be a situational left hander.
Volquez, Bailey, Cueto, Chapman, and Leake. The future is so bright I have to wear sunglasses.
by justin007000 on Mar 3, 2010 12:47 PM EST up reply actions
I'm left handed and get myself into all kinds of situations
"They're the ones that gave you the keys, they can’t get upset when you crash the car" -- 'tHan on my being a mod
by jch24 on Mar 3, 2010 1:47 PM EST via mobile up reply actions 1 recs
Oh, I bet you do

It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it. -Aristotle
obc really gets pissed when sombody photoshops their head on to his body...
Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
And congrats to Harang for winning that "wide open" competition for being Opening Day starter, without ever throwing a pitch.
Damn, Dusty’s good.
by Brian B on Mar 3, 2010 11:05 AM EST via mobile up reply actions
Same way Stubbs won the CF job....
then again, 8 of the nine position player gigs are filled and 4 of the 5 rotation spots are filled, so I guess at least 12 people won their jobs very early in camp
Razor Ramon won his job by coming back to the Reds
Who cares that he should back up Hanigan….
by Highlifeman21 on Mar 3, 2010 11:15 AM EST up reply actions
FWIW
There were no position competitions in the 1990 camp, and the players said they loved that. Even the bench guys were happy to know their role right away.
Not that I agree with it, but as I think about it, it’s not a terrible thing that positions are established before camp. It’s better than the alternative of a player making the team because of a good Spring Training.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
I completely agree
I think it’s a sign of stability and MLB talent. Teams with multiple open competitions have those, in general, because they didn’t have anyone proven to be major league ready. The Reds do.
Slyde, did you ask any of the 1990 guys how much Rose sucked as a manager? *
*Now, that snark is weary! I’ve been carrying that one since 1989
Nobody dogged on Rose
but the common response was that he wasn’t into managing as Piniella.
Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter
As much as I am concerned about Dusty making tose choices for the wrong reasons, I do believe that most guys do want to know what jobs are available and what their job is most likely going to be.
that said, I still am hoping for an opportunity for Frazier or Heisey either to go North or early in the season. Not that I want anyone to be injured…excuse me for a sec…
What’s that dear? You say the guy with the crowbar wants to know if we have El Kabrera’s address…
Anyway ….
Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
So, Cabrera has a crate he needs help with?
by Brian B on Mar 3, 2010 2:43 PM EST via mobile up reply actions
Always wear your Gold Medal when you are about to get whacked

Yu Na...if I were 40 years younger and single.
i was at that Moeller-Harang game
a going-away from the West Coast present to myself. i couldn’t believe harang gave up just that one run that way, and Mrs. Dubman was pissed that we ended up watching extra innings. i’ve never watched a moeller game again.
Wha' happened??
Yeah, that's a pisser to give up your only run on a balk
But at least you got to see Griffey park one for the victory!
by ken on Mar 3, 2010 7:31 PM EST up reply actions

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