Eyewitness Report 8/10: The Cards make like early Kanye

And tell the Reds, "Thank you, God bless you, goodnight, I came."

I linked to Kanye mainly to make jch sad, of course. It was a pretty mediocre game, all in all. The fans even started a wave in the fifth inning, which is way earlier than the Greatest Fans in Baseball should ever start a wave. I never thought the Reds had a chance once Cueto left, and I considered leaving early at least 3 times (in my defense, I was sitting in front of this high school dude trying really hard and really obnoxiously to impress his got grating). God bless Saint Louisians, tough. I did hear someone comment, "My friend's the same age as his stepmother, you know."

All in all, though, it was a baseball game. I did get some nice pictures from the thing, so consider this a far more Bubba-esque and Twitter-y account than I usually give.

  • First of all, I would like to give a one-finger salute to the Saint Louis Metrolink for starting to check tickets and all two days before I can ride for free. So I needed to buy a round-trip ticket to the game (instead of just slinking in and out of the subway). I only have a $20 bill. So how does the vending machine like that?
  • Thanksmetrolink_medium

    Thank you for the multitude of rocks in my pocket. The vendors thank you too, for being paid in freaking Martin van Burens.

  • I was happy to see Hal McCoy hanging out on the diamond. No snark here whatsoever.
  • Halisstillhanginaround_medium 
  •   CoCo is getting paid about $400,000 per inning. You know, I would smile, too. Cocoishappytoo_medium

  • Here is my picture of Tatum chatting with C-Dick (I'm very excited for him to get back) while Darren watches. Craiglildustycdick_medium

    So funny story about Tatum. First off, when he was waiting to get into the batting cage, he kept on running back and forth to the dugout. At first I thought he just forgot something, than I realized that Gomes was giving him shit, and I think that Craig was running errands for someone instead. Also, when all the players went back to the dugout before the game, a bunch of kids near me were screaming for a ball from him. He then made a point of pointing at a cute girl 8 rows or so back, telling the kids to sit down, and tossing the ball to the girl instead. The guy she was with was not impressed.

  • Tre Cool throws first pitch...apparently he's friends with Skip Schumaker? So that was a bit awkward. It would've been a lot cooler 10-15 years ago, I tell you that. Trecool_medium

  • Joey Votto saw this guy next to me in a Jay Bruce jersey, and tossed the guy his batting gloves, with the order, "Give one to a kid." The guy was way happy, and after chatting with him for a little bit about how his wife salivates over Joey, he called his wife to tell her. I hear the screaming on the other side from two people away. Does Poodle have a husband in Saint Louis?
  • A lot can be said about Brendan Ryan. Very little of it would be good. However, he comes out to Vivrant Thing, which is pretty cool, especially for a guy coming out of Lewis & Clark State College (and yes, he went to school with our very own Carlos Fisher. They did not face each other tonight).
  • I heard Taveras hit the wall from my seat. I was convinced it was a Freel-esque collision and he wouldn't be getting up for a while.
  • And to give you an idea where my seat is, here's a view of the sunset over the stadium. And yes, as impressive as the food selection was in Citi Field, I give you...Hardee's. Sunsetandhardees_medium
    • Finally, some poor, poor, couple were getting married at Busch Stadium. Inbreds.  Brideandgroom_medium

      • I stared at this guy long and hard, and I came to the conclusion that it was not Guy Fieri. So someone saw Guy on tv, and wanted to look just like him. To compare: Guyfieri_medium


      •  Guy-fieri-douchbag-mag_medium


      • And does anyone else here keep score at games? And if you do, you know that there are certain things you need on a scorecard, like: pitchers' boxes, an RBI box, and space for substitutes? Well, Busch III says GFY. Lamescorecard_medium


      Well, that's it for this eyewitness report. I may go Wednesday, but that's awfully up in the air. Happy 2010, everybody.

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