10 Commandments

by RijoSaboCaseyWKRP on Dec 14, 2009 3:39 PM EST

A few months a go, I went up to Mt. Sinai (Medical School) and happened upon a New Yorker Festival book signing featuring Bill James. I wanted to ask him about the genesis of some of his sabermetric theories, but I ended up rambling about how bad the Reds have been. We touched on the subject of Pete Rose's exodus from baseball. I told him I thought Rose to be an unsavory sort, but sometimes major league baseball's standards of behavior can be as contradictory and opaque as the Book of Leviticus. I wish I'd had the chance to talk numbers with him a bit more, but I hadn't prepared anything. Deutoronomy, I guess.

In the same spirit of- and partly adapted from - Bill James' 10 Commandments, I offer the following decalogues for the Reds' franchise succes in the '10s. It's my hope that if the Reds abide by these guidelines, they can begin to part the Red Sea of failure that has been a plague o'er the land for the past decade.

Like James' list, these are slightly exaggerated for the sake of dogmatic effect:

Thou shalt not sign a free agent starting pitcher on the open market
Thou shalt not give expensive, multi-year contracts to relief pitchers
Honor thy players who reach base often
Thou shalt not trade useful position players for relief pitchers
Thou shalt make no idol of the slap-hitting speedster
Economize where ye can economize (bullpen and defense) so that you may spend when thou needest
Thou shalt reverse the tides of committing a lot of money to a few players
Thou shalt not attach significance to outlier seasons
Place thy faith not in veteran "leadership," when cheap players with upside be available
Thou shalt not non-tender those cost-controlled players which have value to thy team

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"Thou shalt make no idol of the slap-hitting speedster"

Dunk me in the water for I am saved!

Wear something sexy to my funeral.

by Pops Daniels on Dec 14, 2009 4:01 PM EST reply actions

Hallelujah and Amen Brother

There is an overriding misconception that Clutch is an overriding misconception.

by Madville on Dec 14, 2009 4:45 PM EST up reply actions

As I went down to the river to pray...

"If it wasn't this, it'd be something else."

by ZJiff30 on Dec 14, 2009 5:40 PM EST up reply actions

Did you ask James why the Red Sox traded for AGon?

Kidding, very cool you got to pick his brain for a while.

I’d add to your list “lock up thy cost-controlled stars to discounted deals.”

by ken on Dec 14, 2009 4:14 PM EST reply actions

for the better defense he played than his predecessor?

by timb116 on Dec 14, 2009 4:15 PM EST up reply actions

I disagree with the first as a Commandmant

I still have PTSD from the Braves signing Maddux and ensuring themselves a decade-worth of success. I guess it could read: “Since YOU cannot afford free agent pitchers who would help you, then shall not sign them.” How’s that?

I like the other 9

by timb116 on Dec 14, 2009 4:17 PM EST reply actions

Maddux was a real health outlier, though, wasn't he?

I still love how Leo Mazzone kept Maddux, Glavine, and Smoltz so healthy with his throwing program. On Studio 42 with Bob Costas, Bob Feller said that today’s pitchers are throwing too little and are unprepared, noting that Nolan Ryan agreed with him. It’s be interesting to hire Mazzone as our minor league pitcher czar, getting the entire organization on 4-man rotations with vigorous throwing programs. With a small-market franchise like the Reds, it’d be worth trying on simple principle that it might well work and no one else is doing it.

Also, Bob Feller was once clocked at 107.9 mph. In a different year, with different machinery, he was clocked at 104. Yowza.

But I digress.

Perhaps the better compromise on #1 would be…
“Thou shalt not sign a free agent starting pitcher for more than two years nor more than 5% of your player budget.”

Of course, some might say that you can violate all of these, as long as you seek forgiveness on your deathbed/segway.

Give me a lineup of 9 Ryan Freels, and I'll show you a team that can't pitch.

by PeteyHendrix on Dec 14, 2009 4:33 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

I was trying to find that sweet video of Feller throwing as fast as a motorcycle

but instead I found this, which makes me want to grill some burgers, eat some watermelon, and watch some baseball like nothing else yet this December.

"And then there was the USAID guy in Kandahar who drove a giant pink Cadillac, which the locals set on fire one day. If you wanted to destroy something symbolic during a riot, you just could not do better than that. Good stuff." - Ghosts of Alexander

by Cy Schourek on Dec 14, 2009 4:58 PM EST up reply actions

that's racist!

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Dec 14, 2009 6:38 PM EST up reply actions

Agreed

by timb116 on Dec 14, 2009 9:14 PM EST up reply actions

Thread jack

Looks like a 3-way deal sending Roy Halladay to the Phillies, Cliff Lee to the Mariners, and prospects (I guess) to the Blue Jays.

Hideki Matsui looks to be signing with the Angels.
John Lackey looks to be signing with the Red Sox.
The Reds changed paper supply companies.
Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead.

Red Reporter or follow on Twitter: @redreporter

by Slyde on Dec 14, 2009 4:36 PM EST reply actions

Viva! Viva! Franco es muerte!

"Everything you are doing is bad. I want you to know this."

by Charlie Scrabbles on Dec 14, 2009 4:49 PM EST up reply actions

Well, at least that's one decaying Franco we cant sign to a 2 year contract.

IAN! I'm on traain!

by andromache on Dec 14, 2009 4:56 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

Phillippe Aumont of the Ms and Michael Taylor of the Phils headed to Toronto

per mlbtraderumors. Taylor’s a toolsy OF that Philly refused to part with in the Lee trade. I believe Aumont pitched for the Canadian team in the WBC and is a former first-round pick.

Sounds like Toronto got a lot more for 1 year of Halladay than Cleveland did for 1.4 years of Lee.

by ken on Dec 14, 2009 5:24 PM EST up reply actions

Michael, not Reggie?

or Taylor, not Tucker?

by Cy Schourek on Dec 14, 2009 6:44 PM EST up reply actions

Oh for the days when this was the Reds.

Days of acquiring Tom Seaver for prospects. Days of acquiring Vida Blue for cash. Days when the rest of the league looked at Cincinnati as it now looks at the Yankees.

We Are ... Marshall!

by Thundering Turtle on Dec 14, 2009 5:37 PM EST via mobile up reply actions

Here's to the days when the Yankees are looked upon as the Reds are now.

by Brendanukkah on Dec 14, 2009 5:39 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

I believe that the 11th commandment is;

Thou shalt not hire an old school left fielder as your manager.

There is an overriding misconception that Clutch is an overriding misconception.

by Madville on Dec 14, 2009 6:05 PM EST reply actions

12...?

Thou shalt not lust after batting your CF first and SS second.

Set the gearshift to the high gear of your soul.

by Kevin Mitchell is Batman on Dec 14, 2009 6:41 PM EST up reply actions

13

Thou shalt not lust for thine center fielder.

Give me a lineup of 9 Ryan Freels, and I'll show you a team that can't pitch.

by PeteyHendrix on Dec 15, 2009 12:43 AM EST up reply actions

Father, I have a sin to confess

I…. kind of lusted after Josh Hamilton.

by Brendanukkah on Dec 15, 2009 2:17 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs

20 dollars, 2 Hail Mary's, One Our Father

and a Joey Votto rookie card.

"If it wasn't this, it'd be something else."

by ZJiff30 on Dec 15, 2009 7:02 AM EST up reply actions

And one body shot

Wear something sexy to my funeral.

by Pops Daniels on Dec 15, 2009 9:35 AM EST up reply actions 1 recs

Clearly a fan of whipped topping

Start SEEing motorcycles

by Excalib8 on Dec 16, 2009 5:21 AM EST up reply actions

so anybody see Dexter's season finale?

"There is no harder thing than to have Glenn Beck outlive your child."-The Onion

by justin007000 on Dec 14, 2009 7:16 PM EST reply actions

Thou should not hire managers that ruin pitchers

First time I shot her, shot her in the side.
Hard to watch her suffer, but with the second shot she died...

by btcoop71 on Dec 15, 2009 11:15 AM EST reply actions

Thou shalt not fire successful managers because you think no one should have sex outside of marriage.

Give me a lineup of 9 Ryan Freels, and I'll show you a team that can't pitch.

by PeteyHendrix on Dec 15, 2009 2:30 PM EST reply actions

Ray Knight?

by Highlifeman21 on Dec 15, 2009 4:06 PM EST up reply actions

Davey Johnson, actually.

Marge Schott preferred “family man” Ray Knight to Davey because Davey had “shacked up” with his wife before they married.

Davey should have been our manager for a decade, as you don’t get better than a “player’s manager” who has won at EVERY STOP along the way to post a career .564 mark.

In 12 full seasons, he’s only finished lower than 2nd place ONCE (his Dodgers finished 3rd his first year there, due in big part to Carlos Perez’s 2-10 w/ a 7.43 ERA in 17 games). That’s astonishing when you consider his career is spread out over 17 years with 4 organizations.

Thanks, Marge. And thanks to The Old Testament, too. Go stone yourself a pig-toucher TODAY!

Give me a lineup of 9 Ryan Freels, and I'll show you a team that can't pitch.

by PeteyHendrix on Dec 15, 2009 7:43 PM EST up reply actions