1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you : john cusack

2) What is your favorite ’comfort food : pizza rolls

3) What is your field of profession : papa johns GM … trying to purchase my store

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why : Rico Suave – every reason possible

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites : Operation Sports

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche : That’s Racist!

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular : Baseball is timeless and the reds are the team i get the most coverage of (radio and tv). it was arizona when i lived there.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday : atari 2600

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where : for my sister

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked : an assembly factory for a day .. didn’t go back for day two

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why : Bavarian Germany … it the best trip i ever took

1) I’ve been told “Scream”-era Matthew Lillard. I don’t see it but whatever.

2) I’m a sucker for chicken ’n dumplings, biscuits & gravy, and a well prepared ribeye.

3) I work in IT. I’m very good at it but kind of fell into the profession. I originally went to school for Physics Engineering and if I weren’t such a fuckup in so many ways, it’s hard telling what I’d be doing.

4) I’m gonna have to go with Achy Breaky Heart, with a hat tip to Color Me Badd.(That is one awesome video)

5) Probably reddit or fantasy sports sites. I’ve also been known to lurk in /b/ to feel better about myself.

6) The one I’ve caught myself sort of using in the real world is COMMON! so I’ll go with that.

7) Honestly, it’s feeling as though you’re part of something bigger. I get chills on Opening Day when 45,000 people are screaming in unison at the end of The Star Spangled Banner. For me, nothing compares to sporting events in terms of raw emotion and excitement.

8) I’m gonna say the year I got the Millenium Falcon and shitloads of SW figures tops all else. Maybe the Castle of Greyskull, but I doubt it.

9) I have two tattoos, on my lower legs. One is Calvin and one is Hobbes, of James Watterson fame. The inspiration for the characters was also my inspiration for the tattoos. Do your worst, Madville. :)

10) I would love to see the seven wonders of the world, even if it’s only the midieval version.

I really don’t know where a good place to meet up is, I need some suggestions. Also I think the little lady may be accompanying me.

1) Brad Pitt or a young George Clooney. Or maybe Dustin Diamond.

2) I loves me some Kraft macaroni and cheese.

3) IT. Not a passion, but I don’t hate it either.

4) Step by Step, ooh baby.

5) Does Google Reader count? I don’t visit a lot of sites because I tend to get wrapped up too much in their comment sections. But I read a lot of sites through Reader

6) Coutlangus

7) Spreadsheets. They are the only people who truly understand me.

8) Uh, Reds Fantasy Camp.

9) No ink.

10) I was a caddy a Kenwood Country Club for two days. I worked 9 hours one day and made $15. The next day I waited 4 hours to get a loop before I quit without making a dime.

11) I don’t really care as long as there is a beach, golf, and the temp sits in the low to mid-80s. I’m a beach bum vacationer.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?
Frisch’s! What’s your favorite thing?

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? Paul Rudd

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? Kraft Macaroni (from the box) with Tuna in it and some Frank’s Red Hot (I started this before Slyde submitted his, I’M NOT A SHEEP!)

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? I’m a financial analyst at Cardinal Health. It’s most assuredly not my passion but they pay for me to go back to school. So that’s nice, at least.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) I’d like to pick Van Halen’s “Jump” but it’s from 1984. However, it was played on the Chicago Cubs pregame show intro in the early 1990s and, my God, did I hate it.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? Probably ESPN.com or a crossword puzzle site

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? That’s racist! or any mashup of Hopper, Freel, Keppinger, or scrappiness

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? When my dad took my brothers and myself to Riverfront in August of 1990. Plus, Cincinnati is closer to my middle of nowhere home town than Cleveland

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? Anything Nerf or my OSU starter coat

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? I have a toaster on my ass… or not. No ink for me, but I’d like to get a bitchin’ phoenix rising from a skull sitting atop a pile of bullet casings.. or not, again.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? My grandpa’s 30,000 hog farm. You do some brutal stuff in the hog barns. That or working as a server at the Texas Roadhouse in Hamilton (hamilton shout out to Justin) as a college job. You really get some interesting requests there. “Can you dip my steak in ranch then put in on the plate?” “Yes, sir I can, but seriously?”

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? I’d probably either do Europe because i"ve never been and hear nothing but good things (aside from pickpockets and American disdain) or a beach far away from spring breakers.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? I’d say Clooney. Everyone else says Wayne Knight. Same difference.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? Macaroni and cheese.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? Sports ministry with Fellowship of Christian Athletes. Definitely a passion.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) Mambo No. 5.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? Baseball America.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? Madville. It just seems like a perfect fit.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? Hoping to recapture the 1970s.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? When I was about 4, my parents gave me a rubber ball and a bag of fruit and told me it was my only present. The good little kid I was, I was quite pleased with it to the astonishment of others in the room. Of course, I got other stuff later, but they tell me I still favored the rubber ball.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? None. Those shooting stars at age 18 become falling stars at 45.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? Credit clerk at Sears during college.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? Cinnamon Bay. When’s the next flight?

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet? Frisch’s isn’t a bad idea.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? Hacksaw Jim Duggan. or Michael Cera

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? pepperoni pizza and a coke

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? im the texbook manager for a small university bookstore. i love it. not because i love the work, but because i can be on here all the time. and i can teach night classes, which, if all goes right, will become my real job.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) the theme song from Friends

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? probably mlbtraderumors

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? definitely Coutlangus

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? i dont really know. i was a huge baseball fan as a kid because it was so fun, but now it means something else completely different. it is such a cerebral game, but at the same time it is so limbic. as for why i like the Reds and not some other team…i guess it’s a matter of geography. if i had grown up in Texas i’d probably be an Astros fan.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? we got a Nintendo for Christmas when i was 5. second place would be the BB gun i got for my birthday when i was like 10. i shot so many of the neighbor’s chickens that ol’ beauty…

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? ive wanted a tattoo for a while, but it’s difficult to figure out what i like so much that im going to like it when im 60. maybe the Butterfinger logo?

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? i worked in my Uncle’s horse barn for a while making 5 bucks an hour, digging ditches and cleaning up shit. i also worked in a machine shop for a few months, cleaning engines and sweeping floors.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? Athens. not Ohio (sorry obc). the Greeks are a very warm people, and the sunshine even in December is just so invigorating. and im not a whine drinker by any means, but they make a damn good whine. and everyone rides motorbikes!

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? I always wanted “Chasing Amy”-era Jason Lee, but he’s not that fat and I’m not that funny.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? Chocolate chip cookies.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? I work in museums. Currently I help manage traveling exhibitions for science centers. I’m not extraordinarily passionate about it (particularly the current gig), but I’ll probably stay in the field for awhile. And I get to hang out on Red Reporter all day long.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) “”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M3wgaWAHo2Q" >Wannabe." Not because it was that terrible of a song, but it ushered in the new era of pop music that helped make boy bands and girl-divas big, as well as the rise of Simon Fuller who went on to bring us “American Idol.”

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? Facebook. battlekow got me playing Scramble (“Facebook Boggle”) and now I’m hooked.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? Some of the ones that I’m proud of coming up with are “Ain’t no cure for Cancer!”, Arroyo Speedwagon, and Jay Hova.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? Honestly, this site has really fed my passion for the Reds. I’ve learned a lot and laughed a lot and bitched a lot on this site. I think I follow the Reds more closely now than I did when I was back in Ohio.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? Hmm. We’ll say iPod, in terms of coolness of gift and thing that I use all the time.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? No tattoos. I can’t think of anything cool enough that will still be cool (and look good) when I’m 70.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? Two days as a dishwasher at Milano’s Subs & Pizza.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? I’d hang out with Rosario Dawson. Because she’s pretty and fun. Although I guess it would be cool to hang out in swinging London for a week with someone else picking up the tab.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet? In DC or maybe Arlington. I want to meet more of you guys!

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? Matthew Modine

2) ‘comfort food’? -- POT ROAST.

3) Profession? Banker. Yup.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? Tubthumpa. It sounds like the sounds of many asses in collaboration.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? barstoolsports.com……Joe Poznanski’s blog…..bobcatattack.com

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? Daedalus, duh!!!

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? i grew up playing neighborhood ball and the Reds were the local team.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? (comment deleted by admin)

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? Yup. My avatar, left arm.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? UPS wintertime drivers helper. gawdawful.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? I’d probably go to the Philippines. Warm, wonderful, generous, gracious people. : )

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet? SHIMMERS!

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?—— Um, Flying Nun-era Sally Field

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? --Polish sausage, Velveeta Mac and Cheese and carmelized brussels sprouts (I can rock these all of the time)

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? --Stay a home dad and fiction writer (formerly reporter).

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)—— This one is hard because of the sheer volume of shit music. I excuse the entire categories of country-pop, rap, R&B, and Kenny G because I’ve never taken any of that shit seriously. The songs that make me throw up in my mouth a little are the ones that attempt to be “serious rock music” and are nothing more than frat-boy date rape soundtracks. So, I have a 3 way tie (but I’m sure I’ll keep coming up with more after I post this) between Bush’s “Everything Zen,” Seven Mary Three’s “Cumbersome” and Candlebox’s “For You.” They truly induce involuntary nausea.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?—-I am sad to say Facebook. I recently joined and it’s like slowing down to rubberneck at a traffic accident.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?——- I simply adore Madville.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?—— To steal from Field of Dreams, have you ever held a glove up to your nose and just breathed it in? Well, my love for baseball defies words. When I first met my wife, I was still playing ball, and she recently told me, “I’ve never seen you so completely in your element as I did when you were on the baseball field.” I am a bit of a real life fuck-up, so I know what she means, I think.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?—— My fancy watch.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?——- No, but I always wanted to get one of Hervé Villechaize on my arm.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?——A tie, janitor at CVG airport and a press operator at a plastics molding factory.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? I dunno, prolly Scotland in the summer. Check out the motherland.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?——-C’mon, the Levee, …..please!

1) He doesn’t look remotely like me, but I think the surliness and general sarcasm of Benicio del Toro would get the point across.

2) I go through ~3 bags of chocolate chips a week. I am going to die when I stop being a rower.

3) I’m gonna graduate this May and then go to law school (give or take a year or two dicking around for little pay). I like energy politics. I can get paid for doing things about them. I’m still idealistic.

4) If you can get through 15 seconds of REEF’s “”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HdcHv4o2dEQ" >Place your Hands" you’re a better RR than I.

5) I’m pretty compulsive about wikipedia. But in terms of real sites, I balance between college football (EDSBS, Doc Saturday), food (Serious Eats, A Hamburger Today).

6) I’m the only one here who likes lolcats, unfortunately. I see great potential with the Tavoc! meme if it stays.

7) Pure Halberstam-ian nostalgia. I like the characters and personalities of players and the idea that these are real people. A baseball team is 25 people who have been the best at what they’ve done their entire lives…this kinda fascinates me. I like the Reds because my dad told me to like the Reds when we lived in Indiana. I haven’t found a good reason to give up on them. Yet.

8) We’re not a very gift-y family here in the Schorek household. But my worst gift was when an ex-gf gave me a picture of her a couple years back. Her reasoning was “well, I don’t know what else you like.” Needless to say, that ended badly.

9) No tattoos, I just haven’t found anything that spoke to me enough.

10) In HS I worked at a lacrosse specialty store. That doesn’t sound too bad, but then again, dealing with entitled lax dudes all day doesn’t sound too bad either.

11) I honestly have no idea. I’m an absolute travel geek, so my first response was “only a week?!?” With that little time, I guess I’d like to go to the Philippines or Indonesia. I’ve heard good things about Curacao. I could be convinced to do just about anything. Just not Bulgaria. Never again Bulgaria.

1) Matthew Broderick

2) steak, mashed potatoes, large glass of milk

3) slumlord, Majored in History but never got a real 9-5 job, having the income from rentals allows me to take whatever goofy temporary gigs show up on craigslist. I’m sure someday I will take a teaching gig when I get bored.

4) OMC – How Bizarre, only because it has been stuck in my head since ’97

5) civilwarsourcebook.com

6) I enjoy all the insults, photo wars during game threads, and the unintelligent insight that occasionally pops up

7) We Started this Sport! Opening Day, needing something to complain about.

8) ’76 Bronco from my wife for my birthday

9) no

10) can’t think of a worst, they all had something enjoyable

11) Machu Picchu – the mysterious allure, hiking above the clouds

1) Probably Jaleel White…

2) Chinese Food

3) It’s hard to explain. I do IT Work for a car dealership. I don’t have a clearly defined set of duties, so I wind up doing a lot of crap. Is it my passion? No my passion would be eating food and sitting on the couch, smoking and watching sports. But it did get me into a salary position without sales, and I quite enjoy it.

4) Push by Matchbox 20. Makes me want to vomit every time i hear it.

5) Probably Fark.com

6) I don’t get it.

7) Used to be listening to Marty and Joe, now it’s probably this site.

8) Buffett Tickets of course!

9) I do. I have a full back Springfield tattoo including a picture of Blinky. I have a ParrotHead Tattoo around my left ankle. It includes a palm tree. I have the Chinese Symbol for Husband on my left ankle. And if Sukr’s guy will do it, I’ll soon have a happy shark on my right foot. Also, we are still supposed to get those damn reds tattoos.

10) Data Entry in college. I think it made me go blind…(yeah that’s what it was)

11) A white sand beach with Clear Blue Water..

BONUS: Shimmer’s sounds good to me!

1) Giovanni Ribisi for looks, Randall from Clerks for the sarcasm; fortunately I’m not a misanthrope like Randall.

2) Baked ziti or shells and meatballs.

3) I will hopefully be a lawyer in 8 months. Wouldn’t know if it’s a passion as I haven’t really done it yet. Law school was definitely not a passionate pursuit!

4) Ants Marching by DMB. Maybe I’m more of a misanthrope than I thought, but lord and heaven that song’s horn lick annoys me to no end.

5) Used to be ESPN, now it’s probably Deadspin.

6) Without a doubt, Michael and all the responses he elicited. I use “soft walk” and “rally killer” in everyday baseball talk.

7) Well, I was kind of brainwashed into it and I’ve never lived in Ohio, so the strongest reasons are nostalgia and loyalty. I would think less of myself as a person if I stopped being loyal to the Reds simply because they are losers. I would feel like I was betraying my dad’s love for them, and my own past. I also really really want to feel like I did in 1990, 1994-1995, and 1999 again. I love baseball for all the usual reasons that anyone loves baseball—cornucopia of stats, history, simplicity, associations with summer, etc.

8) Strat-O-Matic Baseball, because it is the one gift so far that will last a lifetime.

9) Nope.

10) I suppose technically it was when I worked as a shipping clerk in a music store packing up trombones and other large instruments to ship across the country, but it wasn’t so bad because my girlfriend worked at the same store.

11) Whichever country that is hosting the World Cup during the week that the quarterfinals through the final are held. No explanation necessary.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? Probably some worthless reality-show celebrity. I mean. what young asian actresses are out there?

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? This amazing kim-chi and tofu stew with lots of chili powder, garlic, green onions, and served boiling hot in a big stone bowl. I dump like two servings of white rice in it, and my insides are ridiculously warm for like…the next 5 hours.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?
Hopefully – environmental law. It’s definitely a passion. My dream is to work as an attorney in the environmental crimes division of the DOJ.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) God Must Have Spent a Little More Time On You. by N’sync. (‘Nsync? I don’t know.)

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? Probably bbref and hulu

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? I really liked I don’t get it in its time. Particularly because me and a friend used to use it ad nauseum:

Andromache: Obvious and un-subtle lewd joke involving a mother
Ducky: AHAHAHAha – I don’t get it.
Andromache: Me neither.
—Then we both frown and look disappointed in life.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? I love the history. I love how many different men have played the game over the years, how the game has changed, but more how it’s stayed the same. One of my favorite quotes from Bill James deals with how numbers can mean so much. I can cruise bbref for hours, just marveling at old Cy Young Seasons and rookie flameouts and Nolan Ryan’s K and BB rates.
 
8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? Banjo! But really, I just like getting cards on my birthday – I used to love it in middle school when your friends would decorate your locker with little notes they made with magic marker during class.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? Nope – I’ve been thinking about getting redwoods up the back of my calves.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? The lab part of the Aquatic-Toxicology-Lab assistant job – It involved cleaning out the blender jars that had been used to liquefy rodents. If you’re imagining that in the most disgusting way possible, you’ve about got it right.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? I’d love to go to South Africa. I…don’t know why, really, except it will complete my continent checklist (I ignore Australia – even though I’d like to go there, too) and I know there are penguins there.

The most 90’s video ever made.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?

I would play me. In drag.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?

Meatloaf, Jambalaya

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?

Teacher. Love it.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)

I contend that Train’s “Meet Virginia” is the most insipid song ever written. She only drinks coffee and midnight?!! Wow, what delightfully quirky and interesting detail. “She wants to live her life and she thinks about her life”? Fuck you, train.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?

I read Arts and Letters Daily the most religiously, though it isn’t updated as much.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?

The stuff that makes me laugh the most usually comes and goes in the game threads. I really liked the idea of “Cherry Hudson, Jr Time” sung to the tune of Peanut Butter Jelly Time. My sorrow at seeing Valentin go is based solely on the LLM meme. Kremchek’s poking stick makes me laugh every time, though I can’t figure out why that’s so funny. I love when posters manage to work in a good “Brandon Phillips will swing at anything” joke. And I love how we can predict exactly what shitty players/moves the Reds will pickup/make, and then they do it, and it never fails to surprise me and piss me off when it actually happens.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?

It’s just the most fascinating sport I’ve followed. I like lots of other sports, but I feel like baseball asks more of you as a fan. It will reward as much thinking as you’re willing to give it. Almost like a religion. A lot of the sanctimonious “poetry of the game” shit annoys me, but I believe in it absolutely. In my myopic view the Reds franchise is the most interesting in baseball.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?

My parents gave me an electric guitar for my 15th birthday. A true gift love, as they must have foreseen how much I would annoy everyone with it.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?

“Me and my brother were talking to each other about what makes a man a man…” Honestly, I have zero interest in having one tattoo, but I want sleeves of tattoos badly. Oh, do I fight the urge! Thank God it’s so expensive.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?

I had a roofing job one summer In Louisiana in which we worked a lot with tar and tack. It were hot.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?

The Greek Islands are appealing, and I’d like to got back to the lake district as well. But at no expense? Outer fucking space.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?

Went to a party, danced all night, drank 16 beers and I started up a fight….

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?
Heath Ledger when he was alive… Assuming this movie included my future life…

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?
Ice cream all the way

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?
I’m a student now, but I’ll be going into entomology, which has always been a passion.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)
Achy Breaky Heart… Those stupid dances…

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?
Facebook I guess

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?
Hobbes, Jayhova, that sorta stuff

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?
I really don’t know… Reds are a family thing.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?
X-Box 360 Elite. :D

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?
no.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?
Nothing too bad… Umpiring sucks some times.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?
California. I could go surfin’.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?

Columbia, MO sounds good to me. :P

) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?
Too hard but maybe a skinnier Vince Vaughn

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?
Chipotle

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?
Naval Officer

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)
Vanilla Ice- Go Ninja Go

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?
Earlybird or Economist

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?
Always avoided them

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?
My history of playing baseball and growing up rooting for the team.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?
2007 NCAA Football BCS National Championship Game tickets

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?
No

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?
GateGourmet at CVG in 1999

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?
Berchtesgaden, Deutschland

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?

Jason McElwain’s house because I always wanted to meet that dude.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? Justin Long, but only immediately after filming “Super Size Me 2”.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? Sauerbraten and potato dumplings. It’s a German pot roast that my family makes around the holidays every year… sentimental and delicious!

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? Software development. It’s only a passion if I figure I’m passionate about paying bills on time.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) This one. Enjoy having that song you haven’t heard since 1998 stuck in your head for the next two weeks.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? I’m a Facebook degenerate. Especially the Reds facebook app, where crolfer and I spend hours each day arguing about Adam Dunn. Still. Also, I spend tons of time on WhatIfSports checking dynasty teams. And Deadspin.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? All of the player nicknames in game threads are great, especially Hova. I’m loving the new jokes relating to jch’s ridiculous potency.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? I think MM was right on when he said that it baseball takes the most effort to follow, but you get the most out of it. The complexity of a baseball organization is completely absurd when you think about it. Learning about and following one team to the point where you know what’s going on with all of the minor league teams, contract statuses, players in leagues overseas, amateur scouting, roster management and all of that is so much information, that no sport even comes close to being as complex. Not only that, but there’s so many different facets to baseball as a game, that it’s always been able to stay interesting to me. And having a place with like-minded people to keep up with this team really helps my passion for it.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? NINTENDO SIXTY-FOOURRRRR!!!!

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? Nope. If I found something worth getting done, I’d probably consider it, but nothing has surfaced yet.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? I worked at McDonald’s for most of high scohol, but I didn’t mind it that much. I’d take 13-hour days smelling like fries and making shitty food for assholes any day of the week over business casual cubicle life if it paid well enough.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? Germany during Oktoberfest. Then somewhere warm where I could order cocktails while hanging out on the beach.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?

Wherever I am, so I don’t have to go anywhere.

But the standards are damn high around here. I thought I was a fair spreadsheet wizard, but that Volquez chart got my head spinning. I thought I was pretty sarcastic and punny, but nowhere near as quick as the regulars here. Well, this is an easy way to wade into the pool:

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?
I’ve been told Peter Krause (“Sports-Night” and “Six Feet Under”). In my younger days, I was told the goofy 1st Lt. on Major Dad, Matt Mulhern.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?
Ice cream, definitely. B&J Chunky Monkey, preferably.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?
Marketing professional for a credit card bank— I build junk mail! Don’t p*** me off or I’ll start flooding your mailbox.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why?
Pump Up The Jam – Technotronic. Saw the SNL performance at it’s peak. I thought my brain was melting.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?
Joe Posnanski’s blog, currently boycotting espn.com, Slate

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?
I’m relatively new, so I’ll go with “sMarty.” God knows I used to love to listen to him, but the curmudgeon factor is over the top. Cubs’ color man Ron Santo is the bizarro Marty— the ultimate homer.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?
I was 6-7 and living in Springfield Township when the Big Red Machine went back-to-back. My best friend and I played endless games with a tennis ball, simulating the BRM vs. hated N.L. West division rival Dodgers— who conveniently had a stable lineup that we could memorize. Hustle got me as far as high school varsity benchwarmer— who knew there wasn’t a demand for a slaphitting, good hands, no-arm catchers? Statis-Pro baseball— not APBA or Stratomatic— and replaying the 1978 NL West helped me to fall in love with the numbers. And I still haven’t grown up. Plus, it’s every day, eight months a year— well, with the Reds you can check out around August 1.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?
XM Radio— I stay too busy to sit down and watch many games, but I’ve always got the radio on for the play by play.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?
Can you believe a U.S. Navy vet without a tatto? Primarily West Pac tours, too! One of the petty officers in the engine room did some amateur work cheap— my buddy’s tattoo of a seagull ended up looking like a bat, ending my curiousity.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?
Washing Arby’s roast beef pans. My first lesson in the business world, when explaining why I never worked the register: “Doug, teenage girls sell more fries than teenage boys.” Can’t argue with that…

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?
Ireland— the motherland somewhere along my non-forking family tree. Rent a car, make a counterclockwise loop from Dublin. Play some golf and, of course, quaff a few pints.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?

I’m nearest to Brenannukah, so I’ll have to propose we meet at Hooters Inner Harbor as a compromise.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?

Brian Cox

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?

Ovenstone Pizzeria in Columbus. (my wife only lets me have it once a month)
It used to be fried chicken, fried potatoes, apple sauce and cottage cheese washed down with a cold glass of milk but that went away last April.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?

I work in the Municipal Court System. Simply the means to an end at this point.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)

I don’t want to miss a thing by Aerosmith. I loathed that song.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?

joncon08.blogspot.com

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?

Boom Boom Clap, Bohica and LLM.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?

I grew up a Reds fan, in a family of life long Reds fans. Baseball is the game that we all can relate to in one form another. Baseball is timeless and is a microcosm of our society. And there is nothing better than hearing “And this one belongs to the Reds”

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?

On Christmas Eve 1977 my girlfriend said yes to my proposal and on June 16 became my wife.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?
None

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?

UPS loading trucks part time at night (10p – 3a) when I was 35,

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?

Ireland. In the summer. I have always wanted to go and have never had the chance yet.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contingent to meet?

GABP

Star-divide

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you ?- I got Leonardo Dicaprio when I was a kid, but ive gotten significantly uglier.
2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?- Rice and beans, fry it with some eggs, maybe some clam and a whole lot of hot sauce.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?- Im in my billionth year of college, I work part time as a tube amp repairman, and I tour with a couple bands for a good bit of the year.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)- Reel Big Fish, Beer. It is to ska and reggae what the Olive Garden is to Italian food.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?- uuuh truthfully… probably freeones.com…

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?- Cherry Hudson Jr. Cutest name/story ever.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?- Jesus, I’ve never really thought about it. Im the only baseball fan I know, and its really the only sport I like, but I REALLY like it.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?- A saxophone, thanks santa!

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?- I don’t but im dying to get one.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?- Being a fake rockstar, you have to be drunk all the time, and not shower, and make out with hot ladies, SIIKE

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?-Probably Oslo, I hear the streets are paved with toffee and black metal conventions.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?- I wish you met somewhere in brooklyn, that would be really convenient.

Daedelus, buckeye22fox, Red Moskau – thanks for your service.

Seems the worst 90’s song has been the best part of this thread. Daedelus, I will be slapping you when I meet you for making me hum “what if god was one of us” all fucking day.

MM had the best “where to go for a week” response, hands down.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? I could pass as Danielle Radcliffe if: a) I could speak with an English accent and b) you were drunk

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? Spaghetti and clam sauce followed by chocolate ice cream. Yeah, I know it’s weird.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? Finishing the political history degree now, though it looks like campaigning might provide a means to pay for grad. School these next couple of election cycles. I’m too reasonable to work for a national party, so if I have to do that to pay the bills, it will be a means to an end. If I can choose who I work for, I rather like the adrenaline rush.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)
Only because my sister liked them when she was a kid and they are now coming back to haunt me in Edinburgh during their reunion tour this Friday, I present this offense from the Brit pop outfit, S Club 7

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? Even though it’s trash, I always check thebiglead for some reason. Also, huffingtonpost.com, guardian.co.uk, and davidsoncats.com (for my college-ball fix).

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? I can’t believe no one has said RALLY CAPS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! COMMON GUYS!

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? First Marty and Joe as I fell asleep as a kid. Then playing wiffle ball in the backyard. Then Barry Larkin. Then my own short lived baseball career (better as a runner). Then god knows what for the early 2000s. Now… really only RR.

 8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? My dad went through and sorted my 20,000+ baseball card collection out for my 18th birthday into 40 five hundred card binders.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?
Nope, though I’d get Calvin and Hobbes if I had to pick one.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? Well… the roughest one I ever had was probably a high school landscaping job I had on weekends and afternoons after track practices to help out the family. I burned out, got real bad anaemia, tore a ligament when a mower flipped over, missed some practice time, and saw a running scholarship evaporate. In retrospect, a huge favor as competitive running fucking sucks.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?
Back home. I love the mountains of Western NC.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet?
Want to meet me here at Bannerly’s pub (the only damn place in the country that apparently has free wifi)???

) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you? – obc

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’? – Beer

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end? – Pro RRer – neither a passion or a means to an end. Just something to do.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena) – Runaway Train

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites? – Barely Legal

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche? – Frank Pastore

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular? – Played little league, club ball, American Legion Ball, High School…always listened to the Reds as a kid…it stuck with me

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday? – I once got a NEW brick

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where? – All my daughters have tats, none for moi

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked? – General Mgr. Henredon/Drexel Heritage Showrooms

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why? Slyde’s Basement – to learn the RR Way.

BONUS: Since Willie’s looks to be out Friday night, where would you like the RR contigent to meet? O’Bryon’s Irish Pub.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?

Growing up I was told I looked like Little Man Tate. I would choose Ben Kingsly though due to his versatility.

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?

Since I have been in the Dominican Republic, I always ask people to bring Cheese-Its when they come visit. Thanksgiving doesn’t really happen here so pumpkin pie was very nice to consume when I had a small ex-pat gathering in November.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?

I teach high school English at a private school in Santo Domingo. I also work as an organizer with a self-funded, self-operated organizing school, named Justicia Global. The latter job is my passion and I try very hard to make it encompass the former.

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why? (Difficulty: No Macarena)

Your asking someone that had cassette tapes of New Kids On The Block, Shaquille O’Niel, Paula Abdul, Janet Jackson, Ace Of Base, MC Hammer, Bryan Adams, Arrowsmith, and All-4-1. I remember the 90’s junior high as a wonderful decade for music.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?

Besides gmail, it would have to be DemocracyNow.com By far the best news source I have found in North America.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?

I kind of miss Manos De Oro. Good thing we have Niño Destructor on the way.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?

It has to have been Marty and Joe and summer nights listening to the game. Then fall would come around and school bed time would go into effect and I would pretend to be sleeping but really be in bed with my ear pressed to the radio listening to the Reds try to close it out or come back. I used to visualize really hard Reds players hitting home runs with the hope that I had magic powers to make it happen. I remember I did it once before Davis hit one. After that, I felt like I could do anything.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?

I received an acoustic guitar for my 20th birthday. Now after 7 years it is on its last leg, but we have had lots of good journeys.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?

I never really understood them. Growing up in the music scene I was always envious of the punk rockers that had the full sleeves, but at the same time it always felt kinda like smoking: it made you look sexy in a way that you hadn’t necessarily earned.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?

Dignified labor is something really important to me and I am happy (and privileged) to say I have never had a truly horrible job. Well, then again, teaching 8th graders as a first year teacher was pretty much a nightmare.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?

I would have to go back in time. There are few weeks in my life that I would live over and over. Mostly they have to do with times at summer camps, or exchange I did in Germany when I was 16, or the first time I came to Santo Domingo in 2005. I might jump on this South Africa 2010 bandwagon though if time travel is not permitted.

Cool band name though.

1) If someone made a movie about your life, who would play you?

Michael Stipe, Moby, or Neil Patrick Harris

2) What is your favorite ‘comfort food’?
Fried eggs, sunny side up. Eat around the yolk. Then break the yolk and mop it up with wheat toast. I’m a big breakfast guy, although not a morning person.

3) What is your field of profession? Is it your passion, or simply a means to an end?

In the media business. Used to be a passion. Now just means to an end. Also, an aspiring landlord. Anyone want to rent a house in Dayton?

4) What was the worst song of the 90s and why?

Anything from one of those man bands. Or Michael Bolton.

5) What website do you spend the most time on besides RR and email sites?
Sportsline.com for my fantasy baseball teams. Mostly troll the sports sites. Also, I really like Andrew Sullivan’s blog.

6) What’s your favorite RR meme/nickname/cliche?

Any derogatory term we use for Dusty. And I love the new T-Virus.

7) What drives your passion for baseball and the Reds in particular?

Masochism…….Baseball in general…..it’s fantasy baseball that has kept my interest so high. The Reds…..that’s when you get into all that mushy stuff of me and my grandpa sitting on his porch listening to the Reds when I was kid. I remember when the Reds mattered.

8) What is the best gift you’ve ever received for Christmas or your birthday?

The Death Star playset when I was kid. As an adult, autographed first edition of Harlan Ellison’s Slippage from my wife on the first Xmas we were dating.

9) Do you have any tattoos? If so, of what and where?

Absolutely not. I have major issues with anything puncturing my skin and I’m a big baby when it comes to needles.

10) What is the worst job you’ve ever worked?

Hospital janitor, followed closely by some mind-numbing temp work in some office that I’ve mostly blocked out.

11) If you could spend a week anywhere at no expense to you, where would you go, when would you go, and why?

South Africa 2010 sounds sweet. Big soccer nerd. Also, I would love to hit Europe, primarily Austria and Switzerland.