running Veteran Presence. Apparently veteran presence does not win championships. Bummer. Congrats to Menace; she earned it.

The dream that began in spring training came true tonight as Menace II Propriety captured the pennant, the franchise’s second in three years.

“This one feels even sweeter,” said GM Red Menace. “There aren’t many who have two of these.”

The title served as affirmation to team architect Menace, who began the year on the hot seat following a disappointing double-second place finish in 2007.

The champions’ emotions, long held in check during the season, erupted in a champagne fueled clubhouse. Players danced and sang along to David Bowie’s Life on Mars, which became an unlikely anthem following a team karaoke night in July.

“Again!”, shouted Lastings Milledge to Oliver Perez, who was acting as DJ. “I love this [song]!”

(from left) Randy Johnson, Rickie Weeks, manager Red Menace and Jose Reyes celebrate their 2008 championship. Reyes was named MVP

The team’s famed camaraderie was on display tonight, as it was all season. “We stuck together through it all,” declared Trevor Hoffman, the all time saves leader who finally has a ring to cap off his Cooperstown career.

According to reports the players voted to give a full championship share to phenom Jay Bruce, who was traded from the team in June, reacquired, then ultimately traded away in July. “Absolutely, we couldn’t have done it without Brucie,” said Chad Billingsley, summing up the group’s feelings. Players offered no comment as to whether similar respect would be paid to Juan Pierre.

The exciting 2008 season was dedicated to team owner Red Menace. The legendary industrialist, who purchased the franchise in 1962, was conspicuously absent from his box seat during much of the year. Rumors of his failing health abounded. As his team celebrated around him the octogenarian appeared frail but resolute, clutching the championship trophy. “This one’s for ‘Old Sport’,” said Ryan Braun. Menace thanked his left fielder, took one drag from his customary victory cigar then retired for the night. His second wife, Dakota Todd-Menace danced late into the night with players at nearby Club Onyx

Casey Blake and Ryan Braun involve team owner Red Menace in the festivities

As jubilant fans poured into the streets of Menaceville one man was already planning next year’s campaign. “It’s going to be quite the challenge to repeat”, said General Manager Red Menace, “but I promise we’ll be up to it.” Asked whether that meant rumors of his imminent departure to manage an investment banking firm on Wall Street were unfounded, Menace laughed. “I know better than to get involved in that [mess]. I’ve got a dynasty to build here.”