Game 127: Reds at Cubs
Cincinnati Reds @ Chicago Cubs
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Hey, I sold my house today! Drinks on me!
I was surprised to see that the Reds are still playing. Er, I mean that games are still scheduled to play. I wonder if the team missed the bus last night or something. It didn't look like anyone but Cueto showed up. Hopefully Arroyo will get more support tonight.
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First
Now we’ll win!
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on Aug 20, 2008 6:03 PM EDT 0 recs
A new good luck charm? We'll win for sure...

People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on Aug 20, 2008 6:04 PM EDT 0 recs
congrats slyde
you sell the cincinnati home or the michigan home?
if it was the cincinnati one where are you moving?
I’ll be asking more personal questions later
by chandrathan on Aug 20, 2008 6:07 PM EDT 0 recs
oh... yeah, congrats on that... That's kind of a big deal ain't it?
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 6:08 PM EDT
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from what I hear
congrats, brother Slyde. At least something good can come of this August.
...because there's already someone posing as Jacob Brumfield
by Cy Schourek on
Aug 20, 2008 7:13 PM EDT
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the Cincinnati one
And we’ll be moving in Cincinnati, hopefully to a better school district and a slightly bigger house.
I’m more a hello man and a welcome man than a good-bye man. And to me Adam Dunn was more a person than a player.
by Slyde on
Aug 20, 2008 9:03 PM EDT
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On a related note...
I just sold Dusty Baker’s house. He’s gonna be so pissed when he gets home and his keys don’t work.
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 6:18 PM EDT 1 recs
I lawled
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 6:19 PM EDT
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We could kidnap him
With the promise of a pheasant or three I’m sure he could be lured into a box/stick/rope trap, then sent off to live on a farm way out in the country somewhere.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 6:28 PM EDT
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pitfall trap?
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 6:29 PM EDT
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Pit trap
Yes, that’s good…we’ll take a bunch of underachieving former players of his, put them in an open hole/dungeon, and then cover it with a bed of toothpicks. When he comes by and hears the calls of crappy players past, he’ll find himself unable to resist the temptation to pluck a toothpick from the bunch…and SNAP! As he bends over to grasp an oral fixation device, Homer Bailey will spring from the bushes with a bowie knife (and inflated ERA) to add the Reds’ skipper to his list of victims. And Homer will feed Dusty’s entrails to the plebeians in the HomerHole® while they scream in horror at what they all have done…
by PeteyHendrix on
Aug 20, 2008 6:37 PM EDT
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No, silly
The kind I use at home:

How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 6:38 PM EDT
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That's solid!
What bait would best attract Dusty Baker? Perhaps a circa-1977 Pam Grier? Or maybe a circa-1977 Elton John…
Golly, somebody needs to tell me how to paste pix on the blog and quote others like you cool folks do…
by PeteyHendrix on
Aug 20, 2008 6:43 PM EDT
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Things to bait the Dusty trap:
- Australian chewing sticks
- Corey Patterson in a Playgirl spread
- Pheasants
- Tom Emanski videos
Also Petey, those little icons between the title box and the body box might help you out on your quest.
"My wife ain't never ran and got me no pheasant." - Fistbands
by BK on
Aug 20, 2008 6:46 PM EDT
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Javier Valentin is so slow...
…if he ran any slower, he’d be going backwards. You know, like the Reds organizationally.
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 6:30 PM EDT 0 recs
hmm
Javier Valentin is so slow, he’s still running from dinosaurs.
I don’t even know what that means.
Phone's ringing, Dude.
by rjdio on
Aug 20, 2008 6:54 PM EDT
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actually I think the dinosaurs are running from Javy...
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 7:06 PM EDT
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I'm bored at work
So allow me to stir things up a bit while we wait for first pitch…
http://theredsrocket.blogspot.com/2008/08/big-red-rant-by-petey-hendrix-81908.html
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 6:39 PM EDT 0 recs
How did you get the picture embedded in your blog....
If you didn’t know how?
I smell a rat……
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 6:52 PM EDT
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Javier Valentin is so slow
Sean Casey could beat him in a footrace to a plantain buffet. With a rock in his shoe. And Javy on his shoulders. In full equipment.

by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 6:58 PM EDT 0 recs
I know what we need to wake the bats...
a batting practice tickle party!

by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 7:01 PM EDT 0 recs
Would you guys stop making fun of the greatest pinch hitter of all time...
My pictures shows him winning the catcher’s sprint to see who gets to flog Mike Stanton…of course he’s gained a little weight since then…but he’s fast when he needs to be bitches.
You can tell your uncle stuff that you could not tell your dad. That is kind of the role of an uncle. I feel very much like a father sometimes but sometimes I feel like a teammate.
Dusty Baker
by Madville on Aug 20, 2008 7:13 PM EDT 0 recs
Could we get him to steal if we put a twinkie on third base?
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 7:15 PM EDT
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LLM NOT FAT
fluffy
Pvt. Pyle, you disgusting fatbody!
by Plowboy5 on Aug 20, 2008 7:19 PM EDT 0 recs
Because you could SMELL them?
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 7:20 PM EDT
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Question for you guys from a Brewer fan
I was looking at the boxscores from yesterday’s games and I am extremely confused by Mike Lincoln’s line. 0 innings, 3 hits, 4 earned runs. He didn’t walk or hit a batter, but he faced 4 hitters. What the heck happened there? It’s gonna bother me if I don’t figure this out. Catcher’s interference or something?
Oh, and, beat the Cubs for us please
And neck size to baby eating ratio.
by jihad on Aug 20, 2008 7:23 PM EDT 0 recs
he gave up a single
and the the next batter attempted to bunt him over. Votto got to it quickly and threw to 2nd, but he threw it wide and the runner was safe.
by Charlie Scrabbles on
Aug 20, 2008 7:25 PM EDT
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got it, thanks
dominate Ted Lilly!
And neck size to baby eating ratio.
by jihad on
Aug 20, 2008 7:29 PM EDT
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sorry pal
this lineup features our two most productive hitters in the 5 and 6 spots, and they have a combined OPS ~.800. this team has been abused by the likes of Brian Moeller. twice.
by Charlie Scrabbles on
Aug 20, 2008 7:34 PM EDT
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lineup
Dickerson CF
Kepp SS
Bruce RF
Phillips 2B
EdE 3B
Votto 1B
Cabrera LF
Hanigan C
Arroyo P
Patterson sits against the tough lefty Ted Lilly. will the Reds have enough team speed to overcome his absence?
by Charlie Scrabbles on Aug 20, 2008 7:24 PM EDT 0 recs
No Rosales...
But we have a 35-year-old journeyman from the Japanese league in LF.
As we near September, we will continue to provide valuable playing time to our young players and new acquisitions who we feel can become significant contributors at the Major League level.
Try to achieve a balance of derisive laughter and open weeping.
by PeteyHendrix on
Aug 20, 2008 7:36 PM EDT
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I have a feeling
That letter is going to be quoted a lot over the next six weeks.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 7:51 PM EDT
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I thought Slyde lived in his mom's basement
Have I been lied to this whole time?
by bengalred on Aug 20, 2008 7:32 PM EDT 0 recs
I've sold the basement
I get to move upstairs.
I’m more a hello man and a welcome man than a good-bye man. And to me Adam Dunn was more a person than a player.
by Slyde on
Aug 20, 2008 9:07 PM EDT
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Can anyone tell...
which player is seen here checking out donkey’s ass?

It sorta looks to me like my old shop teacher, Mr. Krangle, who had 3 full fingers and a penchant for young Asian boys. But I’m pretty sure he’s doing time in Lompoc, not roaming the field during batting practice to glance closely at form-fitting polyester that hides only one’s inflated OBP.
by PeteyHendrix on Aug 20, 2008 7:42 PM EDT 0 recs
So.....
Lohse got suspended five games for throwing at EV. Sweet.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on Aug 20, 2008 7:52 PM EDT 0 recs
gabby

Kentuck Arts Festival: October 18th.
Details at Sinful Savage Tigers
by Man Mountain on
Aug 20, 2008 8:15 PM EDT
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"I'm sorry, but not really"
“I was surprised and pretty disappointed,” Lohse said. “My intent wasn’t to hit anybody. My intent was to make the opposing pitcher feel as uncomfortable as I did the at-bat before. The way they interpreted it, it seems like they feel I was trying to hit him.”
Edinson handled the questions like a man:
Volquez, who was not disciplined, learned of the Lohse suspension prior to the Cubs-Reds game.
“I don’t know if he really tried to hit me,” Volquez said. “Maybe he was trying to take me out of the game a little bit, and mess with my concentration.”
Volquez denied having any ill intent when he nearly hit Lohse with a pitch.
“I don’t want to hit a pitcher,” Volquez said. “If I’m going to hit somebody, it’d be position players.”
http://mlb.mlb.com/news/article.jsp?ymd=20080820&content_id=3339807&vkey=news_mlb&fext=.jsp&c_id=mlb
by ken on
Aug 20, 2008 8:18 PM EDT
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doesn't Dickerson suck vs. Lefties
but do we have any righties besides Rosales, Philips, EdE?
eesh.
...because there's already someone posing as Jacob Brumfield
by Cy Schourek on Aug 20, 2008 8:07 PM EDT 0 recs
bad call
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on Aug 20, 2008 8:09 PM EDT 0 recs
"and he does have his foot on the bag...barely....if at all"
wonderful insight there chris. of course the replay didn’t even have lee in the picture, so there was no way to tell if it was an out or not…
by chandrathan on Aug 20, 2008 8:10 PM EDT 0 recs
shat
8 pitches? not good….
predictions on bronson? im going conservative with 17.
by obc2 on Aug 20, 2008 8:11 PM EDT 0 recs
hits given up? batters faced?
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:12 PM EDT
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oh snap
we have an obc sighting.
Speaking of which, I have some good info for ya son, call me.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on Aug 20, 2008 8:12 PM EDT 0 recs
feck
im on a call with family. text it….im multitasking.
by obc2 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:15 PM EDT
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Too much to text, holmes
It’s worth it though, I promise.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:16 PM EDT
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Arroyo-ho-ho looking efficient
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on Aug 20, 2008 8:14 PM EDT 0 recs
Makes sense
If you can see the bright side of that franchise you can see the sunny side of anything.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:19 PM EDT
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like eggs
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 8:20 PM EDT
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at least the reds' half of the inning will go by fast
again
www.crosleyfieldterrace.wordpress.com
by xjjeep90 on Aug 20, 2008 8:22 PM EDT 0 recs
Rooting for the Reds
makes me thankful for the 3 outs rule. I mean, otherwise, we could sit here all night watching out team ground and strike out.
Everybody's a jerk. You. Me. This jerk.
by andromache on
Aug 20, 2008 8:24 PM EDT
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Out Team! Assemble!
Kentuck Arts Festival: October 18th.
Details at Sinful Savage Tigers
by Man Mountain on
Aug 20, 2008 8:25 PM EDT
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We increased pitches seen by 37.5% Oh, the discipline.
Everybody's a jerk. You. Me. This jerk.
by andromache on Aug 20, 2008 8:22 PM EDT 0 recs
I never understood
The other night, did you say you were a /. nerd or no?
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:23 PM EDT
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Haha, I read faithfully.
But don’t post.
Everybody's a jerk. You. Me. This jerk.
by andromache on
Aug 20, 2008 8:24 PM EDT
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Why?
when she can be hanging out with the 71 Ls
Kentuck Arts Festival: October 18th.
Details at Sinful Savage Tigers
by Man Mountain on
Aug 20, 2008 8:35 PM EDT
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mmmmmm... those are good...
Reminds me of the Cholesterol Burger they sell at a bar and grill near me…
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 8:25 PM EDT
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Foods not containing bacon, eggs, more bacon, cheese, and ground beef
Are simply not worth my time.
Everybody's a jerk. You. Me. This jerk.
by andromache on
Aug 20, 2008 8:27 PM EDT
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obligtory

How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:41 PM EDT
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rec'd for xkcdness
"My wife ain't never ran and got me no pheasant." - Fistbands
by BK on
Aug 20, 2008 8:43 PM EDT
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i love xkcd
i suppose it goes along with the /. ness.
Everybody's a jerk. You. Me. This jerk.
by andromache on
Aug 20, 2008 8:44 PM EDT
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It's part of my daily routine
Along with Garfield Minus Garfield, Pos, and Overheard in New York.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:46 PM EDT
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Same here with GMG
I’ve got Married to the Sea and Toothpaste for Dinner on my list as well.
"My wife ain't never ran and got me no pheasant." - Fistbands
by BK on
Aug 20, 2008 8:49 PM EDT
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Love TFD
Haven’t seen Married To The Sea, I’ll go Google now.
How can such a good looking man be so bad at getting to first base?
by jch24 on
Aug 20, 2008 8:52 PM EDT
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Made by the same guy.
Same humor, different format.
"My wife ain't never ran and got me no pheasant." - Fistbands
by BK on
Aug 20, 2008 8:55 PM EDT
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A friend just sent this to me yesterday.

"Being a human cannonball is not just a job, Pee Wee. It's a career."
by Fat Vegas Alan on
Aug 20, 2008 11:32 PM EDT
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Huh. Well...
it’s funnier when you can read it.
"Being a human cannonball is not just a job, Pee Wee. It's a career."
by Fat Vegas Alan on
Aug 20, 2008 11:33 PM EDT
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That is exactly what the Cholesterol Burger has
People Don't Kill People. Burning Couches Kill People.
by crolfer on
Aug 20, 2008 8:27 PM EDT
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