The things you find on the Internets....

by BubbaFan on Jul 24, 2008 6:45 PM EDT

I was greatly amused by Jeremy's post:

How many times have you been divorced? Divorce is an archaic counting stat, the batting average or rbi of relationship statistics if you will. I’ve long felt DVPB (domestic violence charges plus bastard children sired) or the committed relationship index (CRI calculated by total months of committed relationships status minus total of one night stands) were much more accurate measures of a relationship success and predictor of future relationship prowess. By any measure I’m still Corey Patterson…

LOL! It reminded me of this site: CriminalSearches.com. Sort of the Baseball Reference of criminals. It works best if you have a name and date of birth, which of course makes pro baseball players ideal fodder...

First I checked a couple who are known to have criminal records, like Darryl Strawberry and Dwight Gooden. Yup, they're there.

Josh Hamilton was nailed for fishing without a license, among other things. Bronson Arroyo got caught speeding. Homer Bailey got a DWI. (Good grief. He hasn't been old enough to drink for very long.) Ryan Freel has a lengthy record, starting from when he was a juvenile. If Mrs. Slyde really did answer one of Freel's Craigslist ads, Slyde's gonna have his hands full. ;-)

CriminalSearches.com also solved the mystery of why the Mariners dumped Bronson Sardinha. Sardinha was the Yankees' first round draft pick a few years ago, and was hitting very well for the Tacoma Rainiers. I saw Sardinha's name on the suspended list, then suddenly, he was released. I figured he must have done something, and he admitted he made an "off the field mistake." I guessed DWI...and that's what it was. (And no, the California police couldn't fit his middle name on the form.)

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This is why I make Red Reporter my blog-away-from-blog

BCB's "very own marginally deserving all-star!"

by battlekow on Jul 26, 2008 4:52 PM EDT 0 recs

Pops has found some 'things' on the internet

And he had the balls to publish them!!!

My Indian name is "Runs For Beer'

by Madville on Jul 27, 2008 1:44 AM EDT 0 recs

At least I've got some more ammunition

for the pro No-Hop crowd…

"My wife ain't never ran and got me no pheasant." - Fistbands

by BK on Jul 27, 2008 2:04 AM EDT 0 recs

Wow

I think we have an all-star among baseball bad boys.

Can’t say I’m really surprised. When he slipped that dropped ball into unconscious Freel’s glove I was impressed. Very slick. But I also thought that he’s not the Reds outfielder you’d trust to feed your cats.

Looks like most of the charges are DWI, and the repercussions of that. If I’m reading the codes correctly, he learned from his mistake and refused to take a Breathalyzer. He got his license revoked, but kept driving anyway. The fraud charges at age 20 are from passing bad checks. There are also convictions for possession of a handgun and drugs in his teen years. But as recently as 2005, he was charged with auto theft.

At least they’re all nonviolent offenses.

All Things Bubba: Because how can you not love a baseball player named Bubba?

by BubbaFan on Jul 27, 2008 8:22 AM EDT up 0 recs

this site is pretty dang awesome

but moderately destructive. I just threw my father’s name in there, and when he showed up, my heat skipped a beat…

turns out that it was a speeding ticket in march. I feel like they need to color-code people between “real criminal” and “traffic violation” or something. Still far, far, too entertaining

...because there's already someone posing as Jacob Brumfield

by Cy Schourek on Jul 27, 2008 9:55 AM EDT 0 recs