stupid moral compass.

• I’m sick of losing every year and I’m sick of the Reds trying to “fix” things with marginal players.
• I’m tired of people who say stupid things like, “Where’s this global warming we keep hearing about?” whenever it gets really cold.
• I hate that Arrested Development was canceled and yet According to Jim is in its 8th season.

That last one really hurts.

Way back when, I covered the Bengals training camp in Wilmington. This particular story was a behind the scene look at what goes on. The Bengals were gracious enough to allow me, another writer and our photographer plenty of access. As we were eating with the team, we got lumped in with the offensive linemen going through the chow line. I was 5-11, maybe 150 pounds. BLTs were the featured item for lunch and the staff fed me the same way it did Anthony Munoz, who was directly in front of me. On each sandwich they placed 13 slices of bacon.

Has anybody ever bought a 24-hour pass from MLB.TV? I know people have had trouble with renewals and such with MLB.TV in the past, but I can’t imagine they have that problem with the 24-hour pass, right?

The reason I ask is because Johny Cueto’s debut start is being re-aired today at 3pm ET and I REALLY want to watch it.

*I hate bulletpoints and dot dot dot entries…

*I strongly dislike adult beverages mixed with diet cola.

*I hate people who think the economic environment is bound to get better “after the election”. nah, baby, nah…see ya in 2010, maybe.

*I hate when clothing covers boobs. how is that fair?

*I’m going to try to find GABP’s signature food item this season. Its definitely NOT the goetta dog. Ive heard about a fried bologna sandwich but I havent found it yet.

*I hate it when stats speak louder than words.

why you would ruin a perfectly good donut and bacon sandwich with tomato and ketchup

On another note I could take 33 5 year olds because they always fall for fake tears and the “I’ve got your nose.”

i’m compiling a list of grievances to come later

i contribute my success to my swarm-combat training, hours and hours of my youth spent playing Diablo 2 (those pygmies in the jungle were tough little SOBs. use your Paladin’s defense aura!).

i dont like the Reds’ prospects for next year.

i dont like that Brandon Phillips is now and forever will be a second baseman. i know its a dead issue, but it’s still stuck in my craw.

i dont like the way that restaurants always put stuff on your burger when you dont ask for it. a burger will always come with lettuce, tomato, ketchup, etc. unless you specify not to. i always thought it should be the other way around.

i dont like when every time we visit family, i dont even have my coat off before they start asking when we are having children.

i dont like According to Jim either. i mean, srsly.

i dont like pork bacon. i may be in the distinguished minority here, but turkey bacon is the future of bacon.

i dont like that commercial for Progressive.com where that dark-hair chick is selling insurance to Santa. Santa is magic stupids! if he wrecks his sleigh he’ll just magic up a new one!

But Edwin Encarnacion played his 2nd Winter League game of the season Sunday (1 game at DH, 1 at 1st Base) and is 3-8 with 3 Bombs.

The Bad News – In the same game Johnny Cueto got light up and didn’t make it thru the 3rd inning. He was pulled after covering first on a ground ball to Edwin. I hope he was pulled as result of a pitch count, hopefully not injury.

But would likely get curb-stomped by five twenty-four year olds.

I hate that the Reds always get swept by the friggin’ Nationals when I go to see them play.

I hate that I rely on GameCast and game threads to follow the action. I feel like such a nerd and a loser when I realize I’m just reading a play by play of a game on the internet to the exclusion of socializing with others.

I hate that just anybody can get off Brendan’s Mom jokes. You’re making fun of my mom? Wait, who the hell are you again?

I hate that even though we have so many promising youngsters, there’s an excellent chance that our team still won’t be that good.

I hate not having JD, boobs, and Alan around.

I hate that Dusty Baker didn’t concede that game in San Diego by ordering up a Ryan Franklin special.

I hate that there’s no Skyline in the DC area.

Evidently, 19 five year olds is my limit.

1. I hate people who don’t think for themselves. This goes for people of all political, social, and baseball stripes. You should be able to defend your position, damnit.
2. I hate people who assume you don’t know as much about baseball as they do, simply because they played at a higher level. I’m looking at you, Jeff Brantley (and my friend Chris).
3. I hate people who are too lazy to even try speaking with correct English. I know I don’t have perfect grammar, but at least I try to form complete sentences.
4. I hate BLTs with less than 1/2 pound of salty, porky goodness. I also hate turkey bacon.
5. I hate that kids don’t play the same games I did growing up – everything from various card games, to board games, to outside games (though my neighbor’s kids do spend quite a bit of time outside). If there isn’t a TV and a game console, many don’t seem interested. As a corollary, I hate that you can’t play Jarts anymore (we had the by-God-honest original set, complete with metal tips, and no one ended up in the hospital).
6. I hate that people hate math. It’s the only thing you learn in school that makes sense – it’s all based on 1+1=2. Every other subject is a collection of disconnected ideas.
7. I hate that we cannot edit a post after it’s submitted.
8. I hate that the Reds won’t be very good again this year; I hate it more that the Flubs will be.
9. I hate the way the Barry Larkin Era ended in Cinci.
10. I know it’s all in fun, but I really hate the statements about Brendan’s mom. No matter what your mom should be off limits, because no matter what she loves you.

For those who over indulge during the Festivus celebration, don’t try to dissolve two Alka-Seltzer tablets in a 3 ounce Dixie cup after you stagger into the bathroom in the middle of the night. Seperate each one into its own Dixie cup and then down them like shots. Suck it Martha Stewart!

“Seriously, you’re from Dayton?!?”

In slightly less unrelated news, that Feastivus reminds me of this article about the crazy Hardee’s burgers.

I don’t like having nothing to do in Ohio while I wait for Winter Break to end… But I have a new Reds sweatshirt. (see how I made that about the Reds?)

I Don’t like the fact that during the baseball season football gets talked about more than baseball on SportsCenter, and during the football season baseball gets a grand total of 1 minute.

The fact that the Yankees are spending enough on two players to make a serious dent in the economic crisis or poverty in third world countries sickens me.

I don’t like that the Reds are not going to seriously compete yet again this year.

I don’t like how I can’t go to any RR gatherings… that could change within a few years though

I don’t like that it’s cold right now and the only entertainment I can get without getting sick involves electronics… Please get warmer!!!

I don’t like that my brain isn’t working so I can’t come up with any good grievances…

Bring back the old RR!

The Teixeira to the Yankees rumors are flying all of a sudden. I can’t believe they are serious.

They apparently aren’t going to raise the money to pay Teixeira from their new exhibition game ticket sales. They are pricing them at 25 cents for bleacher tickets, and $1.10 for grandstand tickets – the same prices as on April 18, 1923, the day the original Yankee Stadium opened.

Mark Sheldon says the Reds Hot Stove is cold.

The Reds are still trying to re-sign free-agent infielder/outfielder Jerry Hairston Jr. and have an offer out. Other teams, possibly the Phillies and Mariners, are also vying for Hairston’s services. The veteran planned to huddle with his agent, Casey Close, on Tuesday to explore the options.

“We’re still interested and we’re still talking,” Jocketty said. “We hope to get something done. The fact [that] there are other teams has slowed it down a bit.”

Talks are also still ongoing with center fielder/leadoff hitter Willy Taveras, who became a free agent on Dec. 12 after he was non-tendered by the Rockies.

The Reds also remain interested in outfielder Rocco Baldelli, but “haven’t made a lot of progress,” according to Jocketty.

There have been no talks opened yet with free agents Ty Wigginton and Aaron Miles. Nor has there been serious pursuit of one of the top players on the market, outfielder Pat Burrell, as the Reds continue to exercise patience.

And Rosenthal says the Brewers might have tried for Dunn, if the Cameron-to-the-Yanks deal had gone through.

But Aaron Boone will be the RHB half of a 3B platoon in Houston next year with Geoff Blum. They’re both 36. That team is seriously old.

I kid you not. It’s unbelievable! Leatherdrawers has gone to a new extreme. He signed CoPat for $800,000. It’s in the Denver Post and on mlbtraderumors.com. And Gary Majewski is a Phillie!

Mercy.

The Seinfeld episode it originated from is airing tonight at 7:30 on Fox in Cincinnati. Check your local listings.

I use the reply button all the time but it usually doesn’t send my reply where I want it to go
I think that sMarty should retire and take clownboy with him
‘thom will get better when he realizes that he’s announcing baseball not basketball
I don’t like almost all of the Red’s player nicknames
I miss George Carlin
I could take 4-5 Five year old boys any day of the week and whup up on ‘em
I really hate Charlie Brown and Charles Schmaltz his creator
Why has Ash abandoned RR
I still long for the old RR format
I miss Bob Edwards
What has any of this comment and the previous 180+ have to with Festivus

To continue I don’t like George Lobo Grande or the Crappy ol’ Leftover
Dick Pole
Mark Berry
Mike Brown
Or the little squirt who’s coaching the B-Cats Men’s BB
Plus I’m frustrated that I don’t know how to link stuff on this site.
Seriously – Enjoy each other and those you love, to those of us who have so much, a great deal is required…choose to be happy, choose to forgive yourself as well as those who do bad and stupid things to you and other. That’s today’s Festus commentary from Old Mads.

having no moral qualms was a bonus. But I love how that place had dating site ads.

Feat of strength:
-I climbed the Sears Tower in November and had a breakfast of french toast and chocolate covered bacon. I gotta say, it was a good day.

-I will make Thundering Turtle cry when I link this to “”http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p4WaS_xPsmk&eurl=http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2008/12/23/the-christmas-story/" >All I want for christmas is to get crunk"

Grievances:
-Red Menace just took away my Great RR Winter Idea. But I’ll do it anyway, just feel self-conscious about it.

-People who forget that athletes are humans. I’m rooting for Bailey to make it big and become a star. Partly because I want him to win 20 games for the Reds. Mostly because he seems genuinely insane and has a full body tatoo of the word “Cazador” (“hunter” in Spanish) along his side. Celebrate the weirdness of our athletes, people!

-The fact that Aaron Harang doesn’t get nearly as much respect as he should. He seems to be a guy who’s gotten to where he is on hard work and making the most of his talents, and someone should praise him sooner rather than later.

-That Adam Dunn got run out of town for being Adam Dunn (celebrate weirdness!)

-Not having any holiday spirit. It seems like fun, really, it does. But I’ll just be watching About a Boy because OMG ONLY HUGH GRANT UNDERSTANDS ME!

also, I hate it when a fanpost gets promoted to the front page. it’s a pain because it shows up in two places. i use tabbed browsing to view the site and i just click on everything that says it has new comments when i first log on. i always wind up opening the same thread twice. it would be really neat if we could have threads only be in one place